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16:45:09 Whiplash
... sudden craving for fried chicken
16:40:44 Whiplash
What would your grandmother think?
16:40:37 Whiplash
Risotto-y doesn't sound very Asian
16:36:20 Dora
Learned how to make a risotto-y type thing the other day. Which is good. Gotta get rid of this sack of rice before we move out.
16:35:21 Dora
Welp, time to make dinner.
16:35:02 Dora
16:32:34 Whiplash
I was actually working up to a joke but I got distracted and now I can't remember it
16:28:19 Dora
Jesus, that's almost as bad as that Gwyneth Paltrow movie where the guy gives up his seat on a plane, other guy dies, and he falls in love with dead guy's widow.
16:24:50 Agent Dunham
Unless you're a nerd. Then never.
16:24:47 Whiplash
Probably the time those two snipers fell in love after scoping each other out
16:24:20 Whiplash
I think they're referencing something
16:23:19 Dora
Wat?
16:23:11 Agent Dunham
Sure.
16:20:59 Singularity
But do you really think love can bloom on the battlefield?
16:18:46 Agent Dunham
But you get to have a bitchin' pack of wolves.
16:18:01 Dora
I'm rather terrible at lying.
16:18:00 Whiplash
Nah, snipers have to do a lot of maths in real life
16:17:49 Whiplash
Hey, Australia is a very hot climate
16:17:38 Dora
I think I'd rather be a sniper.
16:16:06 Agent Dunham
They generally prefer if you wear something under the trenchcoat, though.
16:16:00 Whiplash
Or a dumb waiter
16:15:55 Singularity
Realised I have KOTOR already bought on Steam and it will work on my new laptop. And I can play the sequel with mods restoring lost content. Sweet.
16:15:52 Whiplash
You could hide in a rubbish bin
16:15:43 Whiplash
But someone of your... stature, say, would be very useful for spying
16:14:07 Dora
Espionage isn't my thing.
16:13:31 Whiplash
I've seen every episode of Get Smart
16:13:26 Whiplash
I can do that thing where you pretend to be reading a magazine but there are eyeholes cut out of the cover
16:11:50 Whiplash
I even look good in a trenchcoat
16:11:40 Whiplash
God I'd make a good spy, I can't believe ASIO didn't want me
16:08:50 Whiplash
It's not like NOT working for the Chinese but leaking top secret information is keeping the US off his back
16:08:14 Whiplash
He can be as shady as fuck as he likes, he'd be safe in Beijing if he was working for the Chinese
16:07:38 Whiplash
"Why would I make the information available to the Guardian instead of just telling it to Beijing and leaving America none the wiser?"
16:07:09 Dora
They have so much red tape they'd never get rid of me.
16:07:05 Whiplash
He was in Hong Kong, I don't know if he still is
16:07:04 Agent Dunham
To which I thought "Because it's shady as fuck, bro."
16:06:52 Agent Dunham
His response was "Then why didn't I go directly to Beijing?"
16:06:39 Agent Dunham
People accusing him of being a Chinese spy.
16:06:31 Dora
Or I could just move to one of the other EU states.
16:06:30 Agent Dunham
Yeah, the NSA dude.
16:05:02 Dora
Isn't there that American guy in Hong Kong at the minute?
16:01:38 Whiplash
Julian Assange has a way with women
16:01:19 Agent Dunham
Well, you can always go hide in the Ecuadorian embassy if you need to.
15:59:15 Dora
I think we're all legal anyway.
15:58:56 Whiplash
Beat up a street punk called Nomura in Yakuza 3. It was oddly satisfying.
15:58:11 Dora
No, I was laughing at the slut-grandma part.
15:58:06 Whiplash
Jake, where have you been? We've been fixing your life for you
15:57:22 Agent Dunham
Oh no, Dora, which part was it? Was it the immigrant part?
15:56:07 Dora
"Go Hong Kong, get free money from the government."
15:55:35 Agent Dunham
"Go to Singapore next, tell them all Hong Kong better."
15:55:30 Jake
so Tabata's co-director for XV. That's interesting. Thank god it isn't Nomura by himself.
15:55:15 Dora
Oh my God, Shannon. ;;
15:54:28 Agent Dunham
"You go to Hong Kong, see grandma, yeah? Then go see grandpa and new young slut grandma. Tell her she a slut."
15:53:17 Agent Dunham
"You go on boat for navy and stop those immigrant from coming in. They get here legal like rest of us, wait like rest of us."
15:50:02 Dora
"You don't have child! You look after your mother!"
15:46:40 Whiplash
"Bad enough you not ever give your mother grandchild!"
15:45:18 Agent Dunham
"Why can't you be more like your brother? Your brother have job and married. You join navy, get a man, get on boat to Canada and get married."
15:44:49 Whiplash
"Like cruise only you get paid"
15:43:55 Agent Dunham
"Get you out of house. You like beach, you like ocean; you get out of house and go on a boat."
15:43:01 Dora
"You get benefits!"
15:42:38 Agent Dunham
"I grab pamphlet for you, call and make appointment at centre for recruit."
15:41:58 Whiplash
"Professional! Has good job!"
15:41:44 Agent Dunham
"You wear nice uniform, see world with all your boy flends."
15:41:32 Dora
"So handsome."
15:41:02 Agent Dunham
"Sooo many boy flends. Sooo accomplished."
15:40:54 Whiplash
"Adopt many children for your mother"
15:40:35 Dora
15:40:24 Agent Dunham
"You join navy, get boy flend."
15:40:16 Whiplash
"Jake, you want boy friend? You join navy, right now!"
15:39:55 Agent Dunham
"Jek. You want boy flend?"
15:39:19 Agent Dunham
I read that with the accent of an Asian mother.
15:37:57 Whiplash
Jake, you want a boy friend
15:37:15 Whiplash
Male or female, it's up the poop chute at 8 bells
15:36:48 Whiplash
And yeah, they take it up the pooper a lot
15:36:09 Whiplash
Mostly they deal with sailors on drug charges in real life
15:36:06 Agent Dunham
I think this has made me biased towards the navy.
15:34:50 Dora
Think NCIS has made me biased towards the navy.
15:34:18 Agent Dunham
I once mistook the drowsy eye alcohol warning for a winking eye alcohol suggestion.
15:33:36 Whiplash
I'd join the air force
15:33:35 Dora
Seriously though, my cousin gets paid pretty damn well considering she's in uni, for whatever she does...
15:32:36 Dora
I'm just not a fan of pathology, or microbiology either.
15:31:48 Whiplash
You just want to write those warning sheets that come with my medications
15:31:21 Whiplash
... for all the good it's doing
15:31:15 Dora
My cousin's in the OTC, and gave me the idea of maybe going to work for the armed forces. Though upon investigation, they really mostly want pharmacists, doctors, nurses, and people who do pathology stuff, not my cup of tea.
15:31:14 Whiplash
Sure I'm without longterm employment and already $35 000 in debt, but at least I have a degree
15:30:42 Whiplash
Thank God for HECS
15:29:38 Agent Dunham
"Sorry, don't need you, cutting back our business hours tough shit lady."
15:29:20 Agent Dunham
"Hey, it's after Easter and I haven't heard from you."
15:29:11 Whiplash
Just use a fake name and email address and don't show your face
15:28:59 Whiplash
You have boobs and this is the internet, you can always make money
15:28:58 Agent Dunham
"We'll get you started after Easter."
15:28:43 Oracle
The moral of this story is that there's always going to be another opportunity. You just have to keep looking. I applied to two different places after that, and one of them hired me. Just don't give up!
15:28:34 Dora
Thank God for the UK and their easily-abused university loan system.
15:28:32 Agent Dunham
I was so pissed when I trained for the grocer.
15:28:04 Whiplash
I have TWO bachelor degrees and I can't get a job using either one of them
15:28:03 Oracle
I did. I went to this park and sat there.
15:27:53 Oracle
It's incredibly stressful and panicky, I know. I needed money for my bills next year, and I can't really rely on my parents because they're already taking on a huge burden with my tuition.
15:27:50 Dora
V
15:27:41 Whiplash
... I hope you pulled over
15:27:21 Whiplash
The ER part is really scary because she is not the coolest person in a crisis and I'm fairly certain she only got the idea because a friend of hers is one
15:27:13 Oracle
When I left Game Stop, I was in between jobs. I was supposed to be getting a job at a bakery, but that fell through. Honest to god, when I heard that, I started absolutely losing it. I was driving, couldn't even see through my tears.

 




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