Whiplash
Nov 13 2009, 01:57 AM
Ladies, germs, faggots and the undecided (Shuyu), we are gathered here today, under the ever changing banner and in our halls of blues, greens and yellows, to dishonour those who have tormented us for so long. To name, shame and vote for those who, throughout the year, have done the most to justify the existence of SHFL and its restricted membership. The awards (trophy design and catchy nickname pending, I suggest the Crappies and a resurrection of the Golden Kira) are as follows:
The 4chan Award
Given to the member who most frequently and horribly uses and abuses internet memes.
The 'They Took Gullible Out of the Dictionary and Stuck it in Your Mum' Award
Given to the best retard to mess with for the lulz, whose stupidity, having been exploited, turns to mad outrage akin to limp-wristed flailing at you, their assailant.
The Internetz R Seriaz Bizness Award
Given to the member who would most require intense, invasive surgery to remove the rod they have stuck up their arse.
The Doppelganger Award
Given to the member that most resembles an evil, horribly unfunny version of us. In our privileged position as prominent members, we all know we frequently encounter those who seem to believe that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery and that by attempting to mimic our behaviour they will transcend their mundane existence to the higher planes of SHFL and everyone will love them and respect/fear them and who knows what else goes on in their delusional little minds. Unfortunately they're crippled by a common birth defect, being born without the ability to be funny. Some may think that this award is in bad taste, mocking those with a disability, but I believe that it is in the finest traditions of SHFL.
The 'Is This a Piece of Your Brain?' Award
Given to the member who clearly has sustained a serious head-injury that caused their brain to fall out, causing them to be a constant, stupid annoyance.
The Flogging a Blinkered Dead Horse Award
Member who most blindly and irrationally holds an opinion, refusing to see alternatives, in fact frequently construes their opinion into 'fact', and boldly proclaims it. Then is proven wrong. Continues at it. Is ignored. Goes away, comes back again a bit later and continues at it again in another thread. Special consideration should be given when voting for a member to the length of their opening post; the more tl;dr, the better.
The Proppar Spealing Award
For the member who abuses the English language the most. Try to avoid members who speak it as a second language, there are plenty of native-speaking retards who qualify.
Overall Most Annoying
People can be annoying for a variety of reasons. This member has managed to become the embodiment of most of them. The most unprestigious award we have to offer.
Vote, dear friends. You do not have to put a name down for every category, voting will close whenever the hell I feel like it.
The 4chan Award
Given to the member who most frequently and horribly uses and abuses internet memes.
The 'They Took Gullible Out of the Dictionary and Stuck it in Your Mum' Award
Given to the best retard to mess with for the lulz, whose stupidity, having been exploited, turns to mad outrage akin to limp-wristed flailing at you, their assailant.
The Internetz R Seriaz Bizness Award
Given to the member who would most require intense, invasive surgery to remove the rod they have stuck up their arse.
The Doppelganger Award
Given to the member that most resembles an evil, horribly unfunny version of us. In our privileged position as prominent members, we all know we frequently encounter those who seem to believe that imitation is the sincerest form of flattery and that by attempting to mimic our behaviour they will transcend their mundane existence to the higher planes of SHFL and everyone will love them and respect/fear them and who knows what else goes on in their delusional little minds. Unfortunately they're crippled by a common birth defect, being born without the ability to be funny. Some may think that this award is in bad taste, mocking those with a disability, but I believe that it is in the finest traditions of SHFL.
The 'Is This a Piece of Your Brain?' Award
Given to the member who clearly has sustained a serious head-injury that caused their brain to fall out, causing them to be a constant, stupid annoyance.
The Flogging a Blinkered Dead Horse Award
Member who most blindly and irrationally holds an opinion, refusing to see alternatives, in fact frequently construes their opinion into 'fact', and boldly proclaims it. Then is proven wrong. Continues at it. Is ignored. Goes away, comes back again a bit later and continues at it again in another thread. Special consideration should be given when voting for a member to the length of their opening post; the more tl;dr, the better.
The Proppar Spealing Award
For the member who abuses the English language the most. Try to avoid members who speak it as a second language, there are plenty of native-speaking retards who qualify.
Overall Most Annoying
People can be annoying for a variety of reasons. This member has managed to become the embodiment of most of them. The most unprestigious award we have to offer.
Vote, dear friends. You do not have to put a name down for every category, voting will close whenever the hell I feel like it.