Original Fiction

[Bun]

Prologue

- Eight Months Prior -

James sat on the couch in the tiny office, eyes glued to the book in his hands. He licked one finger to turn to the next page and jumped in his seat at the sound of a thump coming from the other room. It was loud enough to grab his attention, and he set the book on the small stand next to the couch, frowning at the ominous silence that fell over the townhouse.

For a few moments, James sat and listened yet heard nothing in accompaniment to the strange thud.

“Val?” he called out, knowing his wife could easily hear him if he spoke to loudly enough. When she didn’t, he felt a sharp pang course through his chest, into his stomach.

“Valerie, are you alright?”

Again, there was no answer, and it made him even more worried; the silence rung loudly in his ears, tauntingly almost. An hour earlier, they had crossed in the washroom, giving each other a quick peck as they went their separate ways. Now there were other concerns on his mind. She was 3 months pregnant and fresh from a checkup with the doctor. Unfortunately, they had been warned of a potentially dangerous complication and Valerie had been instructed to take things easy for the next month. James couldn’t be too sure everything would be perfectly fine, and his thoughts raced to the worse case scenario.

Off of the couch, James moved through the small makeshift office lined with file cabinets and bookshelves, down the hallway and into their bedroom only to find Valerie sprawled out onto the floor. His heart jumped into his throat, dropped back into the pit of his stomach and James didn’t bother to hold back his cry.

“Oh God…”

He fell down next to her on his knees against the hardwood floor, eyes darting over her body to check for any signs of injury. There was a wound on her forehead, but nothing consistent with a complication in the pregnancy. Right away, it seemed odd to James that the blood streaming down the side of her face had anything to do with what he assumed had happened.

Valerie seemed to be disoriented by the injury; unable to fully focus on his gaze, but as she glanced over his shoulder, James quickly realized there was someone standing behind him. There was no mistaking the familiar sound of a hammer being cocked back, but his weapon was too far to reach.

“Don’t turn around,” the male voice told him.

He thought he recognized it for a moment, though found it hard to focus on anything other than Valerie’s condition.

“My wife,” James began, cautiously raising his hands to feign surrender. “What did you do to her?”

“Shut up.”

He wasn't going to argue with the man pointing a gun to his head. “Okay…”

A loud pop reverberated off of the walls which made James flinch. He knew what it felt like to be shot; being a police officer put him in danger of the possibility every day, but no bullet had entered or even grazed him. James nearly sighed out of relief at the realization, until his mind quickly focused back to Valerie. He glanced down at where she was lying in front of him on the floor, expecting their eyes to meet and when they didn’t, when he was looking at a second wound on her forehead instead, James choked on the bile that rose in the back of his throat.

“Jackie sends his regards,” the man said. There was not a second shot; instead, a painful, quick blow to the back of his head and James fell forward, blacking out.

* * *

I got the call just as I pulled into my driveway and turned right back around. The car came to a stop at the curb in front of the townhouse and could see yellow police tape billowing in the breeze , blocking off the wrought iron railing to block off the stairs. In a frenzy, I kicked the car door open and marched down the pathway, ducking under the tape, through the front door. There were people everywhere, swarming about the house like an infestation. It was pure and utter chaos. My eyes darted about the entryway looking for him. Where is he? I thought, and headed the living room. I had to snake my way through the crowd of bodies to get there. He was standing near the coffee table to my relief, and when our eyes met from across the room, he looked at me in a way I would never forget.

“Nick! What the hell are you doing here?" the lieutenant shouted. "Go. Somebody get him out of here!”

“Where is she, David? WHERE IS SHE?!”

“Don’t do this, Nick.” He tried to pull us back the way I came, but I struggled in his grasp, wondering why he wouldn’t tell me what was going on in my own sister’s house with half the fucking police force inside.

I shouted at the top of my lungs, not caring if I made a scene, “Why won’t you tell me what’s going on?!” After writhing like a fish in his tight grasp, I managed to get free and made a beeline through the kitchen doorway. I knew the layout of that house like the back of my hand, and moved from the kitchen to the hall where their bedroom was.

I heard the flashing of a bulb and in that second I knew exactly what was going on; I’d been through it a hundred times over, but I couldn’t process it in my head, under these circumstances, right there, in her house. This wasn’t happening; not to them, not to us—it couldn’t be.

“Nick!” David called out one last time, though his voice became a part of the dull roar of background noise. He was still far behind once I made it to the bedroom door. That’s about as far as I could go when I spotted her. She was lying on her back on the hardwood floor, arms and legs sprawled in every direction, her head was turned facing the door. I noticed the mark on her forehead, knowing exactly what it was. They were putting that damn white blanket over her and that’s when I felt it; the bile rose up from the pit of my stomach and I backed out of the doorway hitting the wall behind me.

The lieutenant up at that moment, ordering two officers that didn’t have their hands full to remove me from the house. He said something about doing it quickly and we walked down the hall back from where I came, but my knees buckled under my weight and they ended up having to carry me. I couldn’t find James, either. What happened to James…? He must been somewhere else. Oh God, James…

- -

Chapter One

- -


Nick McCarthy had never been one to drink heavily. Though there were times on special occasion when he would nurse a glass of champagne or some other lavish alcohol and hardly get to half, it was never like tonight; not even close. He sat hunched over the mahogany counter, shoulders slumped, head nearly touching the wood. In his right hand, he held a glass half empty with bitter whiskey. Standing in front of him, leaning against the counter, the bartender – a younger woman named Jill with short blonde hair and green eyes – stared as she mindlessly wiped the excess water off of a clean mug. She had seen a few cases like this before, but not to this extent in her first year on the job.

“Care to tell me what’s on your mind?” Jill asked. Nick sighed and raised his head. He set the glass down in front of him and took a moment to gather his jumbled thoughts; though the alcohol wasn’t making things any easier, it was exactly what he wanted.

“I'm paying for the drinks, not a therapy session,” he spit in reply, his words only slightly slurred as the liquor was taking its sweet time to affect him.

Jill simply smiled and answered back, “It’s in the job description,” she said with a chuckle, tucking her hair behind her ear. Having put the mug away, Jill leaned forward; she wasn’t going to leave him alone until he said something. This caught the dark-haired man’s vacant stare.

He shrugged, muttering inaudibly to himself. After downing the last of the drink he slid the glass forward, eyes staring somewhere beyond the counter. He wasn’t sure how much more obvious he could make it, that all he needed was just one moment free from all that pained him, if he could only resurface and take a big, deep breath...

“Okay,” Jill said, taking his glass. “How about I give you a break, go against the boss’s orders”—pointing to a sign behind her; it referred to the owner’s right to refuse to serve drinks to any patron—“and refill your drink and in return if you tell me what I wanna know?”

Nick snickered, though not out of any light-hearted amusement at the woman’s persistence. In fact, it was quite the opposite. He was not a violent man by nature, or uncouth by any means, but he was finding it difficult to control urge to tell her off. Sadly, he was not yet drunk enough to reach the point of apathy he was looking for.

“I’d rather not…”

“C’mon, what’s it gonna hurt?”

“…I just—”

“No one comes to a public place like this feeling like you obviously do and says they don’t want to talk about it. I’m not as dumb as I look, hon. I work in a bar for Christ’s sake.”

She had a valid point; Nick couldn’t deny that; somewhere deep inside of him, all he really wanted was someone to go to, someone to lend a shoulder for him to cry on and tell him everything would be okay… He did not have that luxury anymore.

“…It’s complicated.”

“So simplify it.”

Of course, Nick thought and sighed heavily, breaking eye contact if only for a brief moment. Simplify it… Knowing full well she wasn’t going to back off, he took a few moments to figure out where to begin.

“My fiancée called off our wedding tonight.” She hadn’t noticed it before, but Nick had been balling his hand in a first. Unclenching it, the small, platinum ring with a simple diamond fell onto the counter top. “She said I wasn’t involved anymore, said she couldn’t put up with what I’d become so she grabbed some things and left.”

“I see…”

“She’s got every right to, anyway,” Nick muttered, lowering his head back down to the counter in shame. The thought of finishing the drink made his stomach turn. Instead, he fished his wallet out of his back pocket and grabbed whatever bills he could, half-trusting that the woman wouldn’t rip him off; albeit, she seemed nice enough.

“Why do you say that?” Her eyes caught sight of a picture of a woman inside of his wallet, and she leaned forward to get a better look. “Is that her?” she asked, but her question was met with silence.

Nick sat there staring at the picture, no doubt reminiscing about the woman with wavy, dark, shoulder-length hair, sharp and at the same time striking features, soft blue eyes and warm smile. He shook his head to give her some sort of reply, then snapped the wallet shut.

“That’s my sister.”

“She’s very pretty.”

“She’s no longer here…” Nick grumbled. Jill stopped for a moment, eyes wide with shock in the usual fashion. Though it wasn’t something he talked about a lot, people never failed to respond any differently.

“Oh… I’m sorry, I-”

“-Forget it,” he sighed and shook his head as he returned the small leather wallet to his back pocket. To the right, the front door opened and a cold breeze blew inside as two men entered, sporting long, heavy jackets to brave the wintry weather they’d been experiencing. The two went to the far end of the bar occupying the empty stools at the corner and continued their conversation from outside.

With the transaction completed, Jill dared to continue. “…How long has it been, if you don’t mind me asking?”

Now it wasn’t so hard; the questions didn’t bother him so much when his head start to swim. “Almost eight months now.”

“Ahh…”

She knew she’d hit a tender nerve, but Jill continued to eye the man with a bit of hesitance. By now, he was starting to exhibit definite signs of intoxication; sluggish reactions, the way he teetered in his seat… She couldn’t keep her eyes on him, though, knowing she had to tend to the new patrons. It seemed that the dark-haired man was going to finish his drink anyway, and to her relief, at a much slower pace. He didn’t mind that she’d left him to wallow in his misery and nearly ten minutes passed before she made her way back after having been distracted yet again.
Nick grabbed his coat that lay on the empty stool next to him and he struggled to shove his arms in the sleeves but somehow managed to shrug it over his shoulders.

“Can I call you a cab?”

He raised a hand to negate her kind offer and, out of his peripheral vision, unthinkingly, watched as the two men rose from their seats. He, on the other hand, had taken to the seemingly difficult task of getting off the stool upright and unharmed. It proved to be much more dangerous than he had thought, and as he figured he’d found stability on one leg, the other—his ankle—had gotten caught in the stool step. Nick knew he was going down, but there was very little he could do. He simply shut his eyes shut and hoped for the best, feeling his weight drop to the floor. To his surprise, however, the impact wasn’t as painful as anticipated. Nick peeled his eyes open, spotting the blond man who had been sitting at the end of the bar, looking down at him and Jill peering over the counter.

“Is he okay?” the taller man asked. He seemed to be in a hurry.

“I don’t know,” his company replied with a laugh and directed the question to Nick. “Are you?”
Too disoriented to focus on what either of them had been saying, Nick felt himself being pulled up by the taller man who then helped his friend up as well. He murmured something to him, some nods were exchanged and the taller man exited the bar, leaving his companion behind.

“That was a close one,” Jill said. “I’m definitely calling a cab.”

“You okay?” the blond asked, but Nick couldn’t even get his tongue to cooperate with his mouth properly and gave no answer. “That could've been bad. My ass hurts!”

Hanging up the phone, Jill came back with the news. “It’s pretty nasty out there but they said they’d take him if it isn’t too far.”

“Don’t worry about it,” the man replied. “We’ll get you home safe, right, buddy?”

Right…?




“God,” Nick muttered, brow furrowed, rubbing his weary eyes with a thumb and index finger. For a moment, Nick sat upright in bed. It didn’t realize it until he looked down that he was still fully dressed; coat, shoes, slacks, everything. He tried to remember what had happened last night after trying to leave the bar, but it was all just too hazy. He couldn’t even begin, or wanted to for that matter, to think about how he wound up at his place again. The only thing that mattered was that he was there and in one piece.
Rolling onto his side, Nick reached out with an arm to bat around for the clock when he found a piece of paper instead.

Mr. Nick McCarthy,

Sorry I had to sneak a peek in your wallet; it was the only way to get you home. But don’t worry, I didn’t steal anything—go ahead and check. Anyway, that’ll be one killer headache you have in the morning, so try to take it easy. And don’t make a habit of letting strangers escort you home!

~Gavin S.

It all came rushing back to him in one painfully humiliating fell swoop. He could taste the alcohol lingering in his throat and mouth, which was quickly replaced by the tang of bile in the back of his throat. Then the alarm rang out, wailing loudly in his ears to let him know that if he didn’t step on it, he’d be late for work.

[SVEN]

Wow, this is great. And I'm not just saying that to be nice. Especially since this is unedited. By the way, is this the story you have set in Baltimore or is that another one?

[Bun]

Yup, this is the one. I'm glad you're enjoying it so far because I'm a little hesitant about it. Not having a beta is nerve-wracking and I really hate not having a second pair of eyes to look over my work. :3 I'll just have to make due with myself for the time being, however.

[SVEN]

It definitely needs some work, but I find the story intriguing.
There's a part where Jill says "honey", but for a nice Baltimore feel she should say "hon".

[Pixel]

Very nice. I like it, although, it was driving me crazy because I could see spelling errors. LOL.

[SVEN]

I could definitely use someone like you to give me some pointers on the mannerisms of folks from Baltimore. There's only so much research I can do on my own. D:

Well, not everyone says "hon", especially not the younger people. However, it does create a mood that can help.
Anyway, I'd be happy to help with that. Just as long as it doesn't get overdone, lest it turns into something similar to the Hairspray remake with John Travolta's weird so-called Baltimore accent.

[Bun]

Chapter Two



“—ck? …Nick?”

It came in a split second, like the flipping of a switch. One moment in a daze and suddenly everything was so very real again. When his mind caught up with his body, he told himself to breathe and he turned around to meet Holly’s worried gaze. She stood behind him, leaning forward slightly, carrying a stack of files in her arms.

“Lieutenant Cruso wants to see you now.”

Nick nodded and watched as the secretary stepped away. He’d been waiting for this moment since Cruso mentioned it a few days ago. Inside his heart beat so fast he thought it would explode, pumping hard enough that he could hear the blood flowing through his ears. His hands were shaking and his breath had gone ragged. He needed to calm down before he walked into that room. It took great deal of effort on Nick’s part to control his nerves, but he managed to swallow them and rapped gently on the door before stepping in.

When that familiar voice called out, he opened the door slowly, preparing himself for what was to come. “There you are. Have a seat,” lieutenant Cruso said, briefly glancing up from what he was writing. Nick complied and sat in the chair on the right of the two that faced the desk. He made himself as comfortable as possible, though for some reason he was finding it a bit difficult to control the involuntary trembling, the tightness in his chest and the way his stomach knotted into a ball.

The lieutenant, 10 years his senior; a shorter, stockier man sporting dark hair with a hint of gray growing from the sides, sat back in his chair and let out a heavy sigh. He had been a driving force in Nick’s life and considered himself a sort of parental figure to the man in a way. They’d always been good friends, from the moment Nick joined the department as a rookie cop, but he was finding it difficult to say what he needed to say.

“As you know I’ve been facing a lot of difficult decisions lately,” Cruso began. “Then again, I don’t really have much of a choice.” The man paused and wiped a shaky hand over his mouth; now he was the one trying to control his nerves. “I’ve been giving this a lot of thought and there seems to be only one fair solution. I hate to do this, Nick, but there’s no other way around it—your unofficial letter of resignation? I’ve put it into effect. This is not working out, for either of us…”

All Nick could do was stare at the man, at a complete loss for words. He sat in the chair, unmoving, while hundreds of thoughts raced through his mind.

The lieutenant shook his head at the frightened yet curious twinkle in Nick’s eyes, already knowing the expression Nick wore called for an explanation. “I don’t want to fire you, but I can’t sit here and watch you waste away like this. For a good portion of the year, you’ve been stumbling downhill; not so much in your work as it is personally. Nick, I know you’ve been through a lot, and this is completely understandable, but what I do see is that it’s only gotten worse. But you’re still in this environment, where James…” Cruso paused, stopping himself before he could say much more. He let out a heavy sigh and shook his head instead. “You need to do something with your life before it comes to a point where you can’t come back. I won’t let that happen. I’m transferring you to another department.”

“Transfer?” Nick echoed, blinking in disbelief.

“Yes. A friend of mine, Mike Reese, in the southern district, is in need of an extra pair of hands. They’re understaffed over there and I told him I had someone in mind, but I’d need to ask him about it first…” When he received no reply, the lieutenant continued in a more sullen tone. “You can either take the offer or I’ll have to let you go.”

There were so many things that Nick wanted to say, wanted to shout at the top of his lungs yet at the same time it all made some sort of weird sense; perhaps it was the push he needed to start moving forward again? He could hardly find the motivation to care let alone argue why he should stay in his little rut there at the department and in that stupid apartment that seemed to get emptier each time he stepped inside. He wouldn’t question the verdict this time. For the passed eight months, that was how he had been living his life, and maybe even before then in some manner.

Nick couldn’t help but feel a bit guilty in a way. After all, it was his behavior had landed him in that situation. It was true what Cruso had said about his deterioration. Ever since the day he lost Valerie and James—for ‘good reason’, people always said, like they knew just exactly how he felt—it was just a matter of fact. Nevertheless, Nick couldn’t imagine things getting any worse than they already were; he was much too numb inside to put up a fight. He’d lost everything important to him in this world, and although it seemed like the perfect time to give up, he knew he could always consume himself with work.

The week whirled by in a blur, each day fused with the next; somehow feeling like an eternity. Nick had managed to pack about a third of his apartment, the things he could easily toss into a box that didn’t need to be carefully wrapped, clothes he wasn’t going to wear, and those stupid pillows Kelly thought were ‘cute’ that took up half the bed… Nick wondered if there was any remote chance of her coming back; not necessarily in hopes of working things out between them, but because she hadn’t left behind her stuff. He would have to tell her about the news sooner or later. He wasn’t exactly anticipating the moment when he would have to dial her number and hear her voice; it was a simple request, but Nick didn’t think he would be asking too much by hoping she’d be the one to show up first.

It didn’t matter, in any case, with the amount of things piling on his to-do list. He hadn’t even begun to look for an apartment closer to where this new department was located, and he sure as hell didn’t feel like getting on top of that either. There was no doubt that he would still be there for at least a couple of weeks, if not a month in order get things wrapped up. But the apartment was becoming more and more of a nuisance every day. Nick would glance up at any given moment in a random place and remember those seemingly insignificant moments with her, like the time in the kitchen when that meatball exploded. Even if he couldn’t explain how it happened, he recalled spending a while picking up the tiny pieces of meat from every corner. It wasn’t too bad as Kelly made him laugh, but he couldn’t deny the fact that those feelings were no longer there.

Yes, he loved her, at first; at least, that’s how it felt to him. And they got alongfor the most part, especially before he popped the question two months prior to the incident. When he, reluctantly, told Valerie about his plans to tell Kelly, she had given Nick their mother’s wedding band, which she’d kept over the years. She had most of their valuables: family photos, dinnerware, and clothing. They had to keep it in storage, however, and passed the key down to Nick when Valerie was no longer around.

It hurt, literally shot stabbing pains in his chest and made his head throb to think about it. His stomach still churned, every now and then forcing a bit of bile to the back of his throat, which he swallowed with a frown and Nick had to force himself to stop. When packing became a tedious job instead of the frivolous act of tossing junk into boxes, Nick gave up and glanced at the clock. The digital read in big numbers numbers: 12:49 AM and in less than 7 hours, he had a meeting with the man named Mike Reese. Unfortunately, this meant waking earlier to attend to his morning routine as, over the months, it had dwindled slightly. Kelly was the only one with enough guts to point this out, noting—whenever they met—that he looked “like a ragamuffin” as she so lovingly put it. As much as Nick couldn’t care, this time—for some reason—he would have to put a bit more effort into his appearance.

Upstairs in the bathroom, Nick tried to avoid looking at his reflection in the mirror. It made him sick, at times, to see what he had become. Instead, he reached to open the cabinet and retrieved two prescription bottles of medication the psychologist strongly insisted he tried. They’d put him on some kind of anxiety pills, which had been prescribed first, for when he was simply trying to function thosedays just after it had happened, but now he didn’t bother to take them anymore. The other bottle was a sleep-aid for those nights when the anxiety pills weren’t working so well; he still took those. They usually did the trick and he was gone within 15-20 minute, especially on an empty stomach. It had been a while since he’d taken them, but tonight seemed like a night as good as any to force himself to sleep with chemicals. He could just imagine what it would be like trying to get to sleep without them; lying there tossing and turning every other minute, staring at the ceiling while every single thought he could think of popped into his head. There will be none of that tonight, he thought and swallowed the tiny pill dry.

[Kitmitsu]

Story is no longer being worked on.

Then what was the need to delete it?

[Bun]

Then what was the need to delete it?

I need to revamp it later, it was shit and I want it to be a surprise. D:

And also plagiarism purposes. I actually had a bit of trouble with that recently, also another reason why I'm taking it down (not just here, but a couple different places) for an undetermined amount of time. I probably should've said "not being worked on at the moment."

[Moklin]

--------------------------

[Bun]

Chapter Three

A woman with blonde hair pulled into a low ponytail sat behind the desk, rapidly tapping the keyboard at an impressive speed. She glanced up from the computer screen and flashed Nick a smile. To her left he spotted a nameplate that read ‘Anna Martins’.

Her greeting was filled with exuberance; a bit too much for Nick’s taste. “Hello. Can I help you?” To her left sat another woman, though a bit older, at the other end of the long desk. She didn’t look up from her work.

“I’m here to see Lieutenant Mike Reese. He should be expecting me.”

“Ah, you must be the new detective.” Anna glanced down at a stack of papers on a small, black shelf and grabbed a manila folder from the middle. She shot up from her chair, whispering something to the other woman and breezed around the corner towards the opening of the hall. “Follow me, please.” Nick trailed behind her down the maze of corridors, passing a number of men and women, some who returned his reserved gaze and smiled and some who did not. He wasn’t paying much attention to them, in any case, catching the way Anna’s ponytail swished from side-to-side against her back instead.

The building wasn’t exactly small, but it wasn’t as big as the department he had come from. The wide halls had been painted in a tranquil off-white color to match the tiled floor; it wasn’t much to look at—boring, if anything. Before he knew it, they had arrived at a door labeled with the lieutenant’s name and Anna rapt on the obscured glass. She waited until a voice called out to open the door, peeking inside.

“He’s here,” Anna said, but Nick couldn’t hear the lieutenant’s reply. The blonde took a step back and Anna moved aside to let him in. Mike Reese had already stood from his chair, smoothing out his suit as he approached with one hand extended which Nick shook.

“Please, have a seat,” Reese offered as he made his way back to his chair behind the desk. Once they were settled, he continued. “Right off the bat, I have to thank you for accepting the position. It really is a load off of my back and the department’s as well, Mr. McCarthy.”

Such a formality always made him uncomfortable. “Nick is fine.”

“Nick,” Reese echoed, nodding. “As you may already know, we’re in over our heads here and your presence and expertise will be not only a big help but a great asset. David tells me he is handing over one of his best men.”

Nick ignored the compliment and shrugged. “It’s not a problem.”

“Then I suppose, since you’re not exactly new to the game, we can just skip the unnecessary initiation protocol? Oh, by the way, did your lieutenant happen to mention that you’ll be working with a partner? I hope that’s all right…”

Cruso hadn’t said a word about anything of the sort. He’d been somewhat dubious about the entire transfer; adding a partner to the deal was not going to be the deciding factor that swayed him from the deal. “I don’t suppose it should be a problem.” Nick couldn’t say that for certain, only if it would help to speed things along.

Reese smiled and leaned over to press a button on the telephone. “Anna, could you send in detective Shaw, please?”

“Yes, sir,” she replied over the speaker.

Turning back, Reese felt the need to delve deeper into the issue. “As you said, it shouldn’t be a problem. Detective Shaw may not be your traditional per se, but he gets the job done and with minimal repercussions to the department. He’s a good, honest man and he's pretty easy to get along with.”

A set of knocks interrupted their one-sided conversation and the door was already opening before Nick could fully turn around in his chair. The very moment his eyes fell upon the man walking toward him and it was as though a switch had been flipped. Nick had seen him before, but he couldn’t, for the life of him, remember where. A dream, perhaps? No… The wide-eyed look on the blond’s face told him that he had made the connection as well.

“Oh, no way!”

As enthusiastic as the detective seemed to be, Nick could not share his sentiment. He was at a complete loss, and the expression he wore made that quite apparent.

“…You remember, don’t you?” detective Shaw said as he sat down in the only remaining chair next to Nick. “About a week ago, at the bar…?”

Then it hit him, at full force; every bit and piece he could remember came flooding back and Nick knew his face was flushing red.

Reese had been watching them, silently and with heartfelt amusement, the entire time and smiled when they turned their attention to him. “It seems as though you two have already met.”

“Yeah! Well, only briefly. It was the funniest thing. Anyway, it wasn’t official.”

“Then, here is your official introduction—Nick McCarthy, this is Gavin Shaw, the man you’ll be working with. Gavin, this is your new partner, Nick. There seemed to be some miscommunication in the process regarding your being paired together, but hopefully you'll work well together.”

“I don’t see why not,” Gavin replied with a grin. Nick shifted uncomfortably in his seat; it was almost a bit unnerving.

“Good. Then I’m entrusting him to you since I cannot stick around much longer—I’ve got a meeting to attend,” Reese explained, standing from his chair. Out in the hall now, before leaving, the lieutenant placed a reassuring hand on Nick’s shoulder to add one more thing. “Don’t look too nervous, you’re in good hands. I’ll be seeing you,” he said and quickly disappeared down the hall. Both Gavin and Nick did the same, though splitting off into opposite direction.

Their pace was slow and steady; Gavin meandered next to Nick with his hands shoved in his pockets. At first, there was an unnerving silence between them, but it only lasted for a moment until Gavin spoke up.

“What a coincidence that we would get paired like this,” he laughed, still enamored by the ironic twist of events. “I was a little concerned to leave you alone that night, but it would’ve been worse if I’d stayed.” A pair of hazel eyes darted in Nick’s direction; a look he caught yet dismissed. “It looks like you fared well, anyway.”

Down the last hall, they had come to a stop in front of a door. Gavin fished his keys out of his pocket and unlocked it, stepping aside to let the dark-haired man in first, then slipped in behind him.

“Well,” he sighed, leaning in the doorway with his hands crossed over his chest, “This is it. It’s small, I know, and drab, but we’ll probably spend most of our time in the field. We do share the room with a few more detectives; they’re usually on a different shift, but you’ll run into them, I’m sure. It’s more of a glorified storage unit than anything else, so feel free to utilize whatever you need.”

Nick ran the tip of his index finger over the top of the only empty desk and found himself zoning out again. It had been hard to concentrate on much of anything that day, though the night before his mind swam with hundreds of thoughts.

“Listen, uh…I know you just got here, but…you wouldn’t happen to be hungry, would you?”

For the first time, the first real connection, their eyes met. Nick didn’t need to say anything for Gavin to understand. He flashed his new partner a wicked smile and turned back into the hall. For some reason, Nick could not fight the feeling that things would get interesting.

--


The small diner over looking the harbor was practically empty when they arrived, save for an older gentleman sitting at the counter sipping coffee. Gavin led them to a booth in the corner and the waitress appeared seconds later. She was an older woman, heavier set with bright red hair and jovial smile.

“I was wondering when you’d show your face again,” the woman said, smiling warmly at him. Her name tag read Agnes.

“Good to see you, too, Aggie. This is Nick McCarthy, my new partner.”

“Oh my,” Agnes beamed, smiling in an almost flirtatious manner. “It’s a pleasure to make you, Nick. You got yourself a handful here.”

“Stop it,” Gavin spat, waving off the comment.

“What? I’m just saying…”

Gavin rolled his eyes. “All right, I think that’s enough.”

Agnes shot the blond a look Nick had almost forgotten; a glare any man would cower under, with a hint of playful affection on the side. “I suppose you’ll have the usual then?”

“As always.”

“And for Nick?”

His brown eyes skimmed the choices; everything looked good. “…Actually, I’m not sure.”

“You should try the soup of the day. It’s clam chowder--delicious.”

“I’ll have that then,” Nick said, handing her the menu.

Gavin tilted his head back over the booth to thank her. The two exchanged grins as Agnes shuffled down the walkway lined with black and white checkered tile back behind the counter and disappeared into the kitchen.

“Would I be wrong in guessing you come here a lot?” Nick asked observantly.

“Let’s see,” Gavin began, exaggerating by counting on his fingers. “S’got to be the third time this week. But what can I say?” He smiled, and leaned forward to prop his elbows on the tabletop. “They’ve got some killer pancakes. Anyhoo, as much as I’d love to chitchat, we should probably get down to business. I know you haven’t had a chance to glance over the case file, but there’s really not much to read about. Because of the lack of a lead, I’m going to have to reexamine everything: evidence, suspects, witnesses—you name it."

“Should I take notes?” Nick joked, though he wasn’t expecting much of a response. Gavin continued.

“About 3 months ago, narcotics got a case involving a homicide. A handful of men were convicted for dirtying their hands with dealing, but we never could track down the suspect responsible for the murder. Then, all of a sudden, we got a bunch of tips in like crazy, but they all led to dead ends. We didn’t have much to go off of and had to put the case on hiatus for a couple of weeks. Now some people are slowly stepping forward, although I don’t know exactly what that’ll mean for us.”

Nearly 10 minutes later, Agnes appeared from the kitchen carrying two plates. She placed one in front of Gavin, which had a surprising amount of food piled on top, then carefully placed the steaming hot bowl of clam chowder in front of Nick. From her red and white striped pocket, she pulled out some crackers in a bag and placed them on the table, asking them if they needed anything more.

Both men glanced over their food before Agnes could take off again. Gavin eyed her mouthing the word ‘coffee’ with a pout tugging at his face. She playfully slapped the back of her hand against Gavin’s shoulder and excused herself only to return shortly with his drink. When she was gone again, Nick blew softly on his soup while Gavin dug right in, eagerly cutting into his pancakes with a fork.

“Right after this,” he said, shoving a piece into his mouth, “I’ve go’uh gir-” Gavin paused to chew and swallow, “a girl who said she’d be willing to talk. I haven’t had a chance to tell her I’d be bringing someone along, but I’m almost certain that won’t make a difference. She’ll be armed so you should watch yourself.”

“Gun?”

“Knife, most likely. And if she’s really wary, she’s got some guys on her back that could pose a big threat—they’ll have the guns.”

This made Nick frown. He wasn’t sure if he understood everything he was being told, other than he needed to make sure he should be on high alert.

“I know this seems a little over the top, but the guy we’re trying to track down is, obviously, dangerous. I guess the woman who’s agreed to meet with me has some information that could get him in some serious trouble. She’s asking for protection; that is, if she’s going to cooperate with us first. If we can provide that for her, then maybe...” Gavin downed a mouthful of pancakes with a swig of coffee and lightly padded the mess away with a napkin.

“I’ve done so much, reached out to so many people and it’s gotten me nowhere. And now I have to start all over again; although, I have to say, with a new partner, it could be interesting.”

The look in Gavin’s eyes as he said that caught Nick off guard and he softly choked on his soup. “…Just how many partners have you had?”

“I’m more of a do-it-yourself kinda guy, and the lieutenant will allow it on occasion, but there are others when he looks me in the eye, points a finger, shakes it and says, ‘It’s time to play nice, Gavin. Just admit you need some help!’”

Gavin laughed at the thought, but his enthusiasm was short lived when Nick didn’t respond in the manner he had hoped for. If anything, Nick seemed horrified.From the moment they collided at the bar, and in Reese’s office, Gavin could feel the tension radiating off of the man. Just the way the Nick carried himself was suggestive enough that there must be something more, something deep inside him boiling, ready to surface at any moment.

They finished their meals in a hurry, paid the tab and left a generous tip between the both of them. Agnes nodded as Nick eyed her in return, trailing out the door behind Gavin in his white button up shirt, long-sleeves rolled to his elbows, tan slacks, and loafers. Noticing a man was not something he did much. In fact, Nick had to remind himself not to think about how handsome the other detective really was. Most likely younger by only a few years and taller by an inch, Gavin had a fine body, tuned to the demands of his profession, enough that Nick had to force himself to put an end to those thoughts.

He hadn’t realized it until the car stopped in front of a row of run-down townhomes that they were at their destination. Nick slipped out of the car and squinted when the sun hit his eyes. He glanced down the street both ways to find children playing on the sidewalk and older folks sitting on their porches, staring. It couldn’t be any more obvious that a visit from two guys dressed in suits meant trouble. On the steps, Gavin had found an older woman who was pointing to the back of the house, but he shook his head at her gesture. With a little bit of convincing, another woman, though reluctant, came to stand in the doorway.

Every now and then, she would glance to the street as though she were waiting for someone. It was just as unnerving for the detectives as well, to which they both conferred it would be best to get inside the house. The woman scurried into the hall first, not bothering to wait for them to follow, but they stayed in the entryway close to the door.

“Cynthia, you need to talk to us or we can’t protect you.”

“He’s gonna show up; I know it.”

“If anyone comes here it’ll be his friends. Do you really think he would put himself out there when he knows the cops are on his tail? We could be the ones to intercept them, so, please, don’t jerk me around like this.”

“You know what’s gonna happen,” the woman insisted, hugging herself in an attempt to calm her trembling. “He’ll send those people after me once he figures out I’m talkin’ to you guys.” She frowned and shook her head. “I can’t do this.”

Gavin stepped in closer, placed a comforting hand on her shoulder and leaned down to meet her gaze. “Yes you can,” he said. Still standing in front of the door, Nick watched as his partner tried to console and encourage the woman. “If you help us, we can help you.”

“No,” she shook her head once more, this time with more resolution than the first. “You should leave.”

Heavy steps sounded up the front stairs to the porch and a thunderous crack echoed in the hall. Nick barely had any time to react to the door swinging at him. He was struck hard in the back, throwing him off balance. Nick stumbled forward and collided headfirst with the doorway leading to the den. Gavin, on the other hand, had instinctively drawn out his weapon and aimed at the two men pointing theirs at him.

“Put the gun down!” Gavin spoke in a stern voice. He glanced to his side to make sure Nick was alright, but couldn’t break his aim. The sight of blood dripping down Nick’s forehead made the situation even worse.

“Wait a minute!” Cynthia shouted and stepped in between the chaos. “What the fuck are you guys doing here? I thought I said to wait for me!”

“Tell this nigga’ t’get his gun outta my face!” the taller, darker one spat, thrusting his gun forward over the small woman holding him back. His finger itched, gently squeezing the trigger, ready to unload at any moment.

On the floor, Nick turned himself over to lean against the wall and Gavin could no longer ignore what had happened. Instead of holding his stance, he turned his back on the men and leaned in closely to inspect the wound on Nick’s brow.

“You alright?” Gavin asked, holding his partner steady when he swayed a bit.

Nick nodded in reply, despite the throbbing in his head. Cynthia had already managed to calm her friends down enough that they were no longer aiming their weapons, but they still looked tense.

Gavin spoke warily, returning his gun to its holster hidden by the flap of his long coat. “All we’re trying to do here is find some middle ground, and maybe exchange a little information. But this really isn’t working out…” He glanced at Nick who was still bleeding, though quickly regaining his sense of awareness. They would have to get that wound tended to and reschedule this meeting in a secure location.

The taller man holstered his weapon having been persuaded enough that there was no reason to have them waving them about. “Good…that’s good…” Gavin said. “We’re here to help both of you to the best of our abilities. We want to help Cynthia; we want to protect her so you don’t have to put your asses on the line when they come around looking for her.”

The two men glanced at each other again, silently conversing.

“Okay,” the taller one replied. “We’re listening.”

~

“You should really get this checked out by someone who knows what they’re doing,” Gavin said, sitting in the back seat of the car facing Nick as he tended to the wound on his forehead. Luckily, there had been a first aid kit in the trunk. Nick flinched slightly at his partner’s touch, but otherwise braved the sting. “You might need stitches.”

“I’ll be fine,” Nick replied and hissed softly. “Head wounds always bleed a lot.”

“Hold still.”

“Tsk…that hurts!”

“Don’t be such a baby,” Gavin scoffed, rolling his eyes. He hadn’t meant anything by it other than for to hold Nick still and slipped one hand around the man’s neck while the other hand wiped away the now dried blood. Gavin quickly realized what he had done and was about to pull away when the thought became too suspicious. If he reacted on instinct, it would be painfully obvious, so he couldn’t do that. Instead, he focused on the task of getting the band-aid on properly. “There.”

Nick sat back in the seat and gingerly tapped his brow.

“You sure you don’t want to get it checked out?”

“Yeah, I’ll be fine. We should be heading back anyway,” Nick answered, perhaps even a bit hastily than he meant it to be, and opened the back door. Gavin waited a moment before Nick slipped into the passenger’s side to take his place behind the wheel. They were on the road in seconds, no more questions asked.

- -


Bleary eyed and sore from having been staring at a computer screen for nearly two hours and Gavin returned to the office only to find Nick still sitting at his desk. The man was staring at something and snapped his eyes up to meet Gavin’s gaze.

“You’re still here? I thought you’d be going home by now.”

“Why would you think that?”

“…Well, it’s about a forty minute drive up north. I figure you’d want to be home before,” Gavin glanced at the clock on the wall, “Ten.”

Nick paused to check the time for himself and tossed the manila folder back on the desk that had been lying on his lap. He stood from the chair, plucked his keys out of the top drawer and went for his coat hanging on the rack near the door.

“How’s the, uhh…?” Gavin pointed to his own brow, but was already focused on reading something he had found lying on top of his desk.

“A bit sore, but I’ll live,” Nick replied.

“I should hope so…”

With his hand on the knob, Nick hesitated before leaving. He thought he should say goodbye or something of the sort and was thankful when Gavin did the honor for him. Luckily, being around the blond wasn’t as awkward as he thought he would, if only for the fact that Gavin had a strong personality. The man forced himself out there, which wasn’t necessarily a bad thing. It made being his partner that much easier.

“I’ll see you in the morning then?” Gavin asked. He sat back in his chair, feet propped on the desk with his legs crossed. He wouldn’t pry any further into Nick’s business out of respect for the fact that they’d just met. But it was something he was definitely interested in.

“Yeah, tomorrow morning.” With watchful eyes, Gavin stared as Nick turned to head into the hall and the door clicked shut behind him.

[Bun]

Chapter Three (cont.)

--



As anticipated, Nick arrived at the empty apartment sometime around ten. He hadn’t been paying too much attention to the time because it simply didn’t faze him. He’d lost track of when seven turned to eight and eight turned to nine, and now he was home again dodging boxes scattered about the entryway as he slipped into the living room. Nick was just about to toss his jacket onto the couch and had one finger tucked into the knot of his tie when he spotted a figure standing in front of him. She seemed to be a bit distressed by the look on her face, hardly fazed by the wound on Nick’s forehead, much more concerned about the boxes.

“What’s going on here?” the woman asked.

“…Kelly.”

“What are all these boxes for?”

Nick braced himself for what he knew was about to come, sucking in a deep breath through his nose and straightened his back as he walked passed her to toss his keys on the counter. He was not in the mood to deal with this and most certainly had no desire to explain what she had voluntarily walked away from.

“Are you moving?”

“No, I’m trying this new minimalist thing, so I thought I’d get rid of all my stuff,” he joked, but she didn’t share his sarcasm. Kelly said nothing in reply and when their gazes met, Nick just shrugged. “I was transferred.”

“Transferred?!” Kelly yelped as though she was allowed to be surprised. “But why? And where to?”

With his back facing her, Nick wondered aloud, “I don’t see why this should be any of your concern…”

“Of course it should. We’re engaged after all.”

“I thought you were passed that idea?”

“Nick,” she whined. He hated it when she whined but he couldn’t, no, didn’t want to fight her.

“To the southern precincts,” he sighed and muttered. It would take a miracle to get her out of the apartment, but anything Nick could do to speed the process was worth it. “I have to be out of here by the end of the month and I’m not even close to having half of this place packed up.” Nick paused to gather his thoughts, immediately changing the subject. “Why are you here, Kelly?”

A frown pulled at her brow as she inched closer. “Because I was worried about you. I said some things that I didn’t really mean and now that I’ve had some time to think about it, about us, I want to try and work things out…”

She was within arms reach and Nick was finding it increasingly difficult keep his hands off of her. He had heard every apology she could spout after their constant fighting. As badly as he wished she would go, he wanted nothing more than to pull her body close to his, take in the scent he’d become so familiarized with and forget about what happened. But when he turned the idea over in his mind, the thought didn’t seem to be as appealing as it once had.

Kelly tilted her head down to force him to look at her. It made his blood boil. How could she waltz in there like nothing had happened and act so sweetly, so innocently? Suddenly he wished he hadn’t come home from work, wished he’d stayed at the department instead.

“Please, don’t do this right now…”

“Do what?”

“This!” Nick barked and walked around her, putting some space between them. “You always do this, and I end up falling for it, but I don’t want to this time.”

“You don’t want to what? You’re not making any sense.”

“I don’t care! It doesn’t matter anymore. I just…I can’t handle it; not tonight,” he said with an ease that amazed even him. Although he could tell just by the look on her face that Kelly wanted to object—she didn’t, for whatever reason. Nick didn’t care to understand and watched as she reluctantly made her way to the entryway.

Kelly turned to face him with her hand gripping the knob, pausing as though she had something else to say. She refrained, however, feigning defeat in her green eyes and then disappeared through the front door.

[Bun]

Chapter Four


Kelly’s unexpected visit had been enough motivation for Nick to get a significant portion of packing finished; though the lack of evidence in the case, witnesses, suspects and tips gave him some free time as well. He had no arguments when Gavin insisted he get his personal business settled before fully immersing himself into work. It would give Nick a chance to spend as much time as he could unaccompanied, and that was all he wanted for the moment.

As much of a hassle as boxing the apartment started out to be; Nick could hardly believe how empty it felt as he neared the end of his task. Just a short time ago, the place had been warm and inviting, a safe haven fit for parties or something as simple as reading a book in the sunlight that shown through the tall windows, but now it was not that at all. Nick tried not to picture the place where Kelly was staying, whether it was with a friend or family; another man, maybe? Just the mere thought made him upset. It was at that moment when he decided not to stay there. He thought it best to rent a motel room in the city for as long as it would take to get things done, and brought only what he needed to a small place on the harbor.

The building was aged, reminiscent of the architecture from back when he was a child; a two-story building that sat on a sizeable lot and cheap enough that he could afford. An older man greeted him as he stepped in the front entry—the owner, perhaps—who remained silent and let the young girl behind the counter handle the transaction.

“Hi there! How can I help you?”

“I need a room for a few days.”

“Okay then.” She turned to the computer and began typing without having to look at her hands. “We’ve got a couple rooms available…number 12 on the first floor closest to the office, but there’s also number 28, which just opened up. It’s on the second floor. Do you know how many days you plan on staying?”

“Not sure,” Nick replied in a monotonous tone, fishing his wallet out of his back pocket. “28 is upstairs, you said?”

“Yeah. It’s still being cleaned, but I can have it ready by 3:00 PM.”

“I’ll take it.”

“Will that be cash or credit?”

“Credit.”

“If I could see your card and a form of picture ID, please?”

Nick set both his card and driver’s license onto the counter between them; deliberately avoiding eye contact with the picture of the woman is his wallet. The young girl entered some more information into the computer and glanced between him and the screen.

“We have a couple of complimentary services if you’re interested: breakfast, laundry, newspaper…”

“Just the paper is fine…”

After a brief moment, something began to print out behind her and she handed Nick his card and ID.

“Alright, Mr. McCarthy, you’re in room number 28 and it will be ready at 3:00 PM today. I will see you then!”

He tried to meet her enthusiasm with a half-hearted smile, but could barely manage even that. More than ready to get out of there, away from the cheery brunette, Nick headed straight for the department.

- -

When he arrived, it was a bit early though not early enough to beat his partner. Gavin was sitting at his desk, still sporting his trench coat. He was in the middle of turning off the computer screen and rose from his seat when Nick moved across the room to settle at his desk.

“Don’t get comfortable just yet. We’ve got a stiff on our hands,” Gavin said, snatching a couple files out of one of the cabinets against the wall and headed for the door. Nick just stared at him, surprised to have a break in the case, and after only a week, but somewhere deep in the pit of his stomach he felt somewhat reluctant to accompany his partner—for what reason he was not sure.

- -

Nick’s body tensed the moment he laid eyes on the outside of the apartment building. He could feel his legs moving under him, directing his body forward closely behind Gavin who walked with long, determined strides, yet the urge to run back to the car continued to engulf him. Nick hadn’t been on too many crime scenes—of this caliber, in any case—for a few months. After being forced to take a bout of temporary leave, he had to be slowly eased back into work, despite having demanded they let him return to the way things were before. Now, after assuming the progress he had made really meant something, it was falling to pieces. His breath caught in his throat, his chest tightened and his stomach turned. Just when he thought he might give into the fear, he quickly realized that Gavin had stopped dead in his tracks in front of him.

“You okay?” the blond asked. Gavin was standing very close, almost uncomfortably so.

Nick sucked in a deep breath of air before replying and nodded, hoping this bout of anxiety would pass before Gavin had enough time to read into it. They strode up the staircase and in through the entryway when Nick managed to gain some composure, only to walk into a complete and utter mess.

“Holy crap,” Gavin whispered, standing face to face with a picture that had been smashed in, hanging askew on the wall. A uniformed officer greeted them and shook their hands.

“Detective Shaw…”

Gavin nodded. Apparently, they knew each other. “My partner, Nick McCarthy,” he said, motioning behind him. “Who else are you expecting?”

“Some people from narcotics,” the detective said; more detectives meant more trouble, but it wouldn’t be any of their concern at the moment.

“I see. What’d you find?”

“Mostly marijuana—we’re still tallying that up—but a significant amount of cocaine and pills as well. We found a couple of lines in the bedroom that were being used. From the looks of it, I’d say we’ve got a dealer on our hands.”

“That much?” –enough to constitute the man a drug dealer—“Where’s the body?”

“In here.” They were led down a hallway to a bedroom that was being tended to by the forensics team. “We haven’t bagged her yet, but we’ll have to soon. I figure the whole scenario went something like this: she was using when the attackers came. We found some shoe prints on the tile in the entryway, albeit smeared; it’s pretty obvious there are two different sets. It looks like she put up quite a fight by the mess in the hall, which led them to the bedroom. Now, we’re not too sure about what happened in here, but judging by the marks on her body, they roughed her up a bit. There’re scratches, bruises, some broken fingernails and some dried blood under them. She wasn’t killed by any blunt force trauma as far as we can tell just by looking at her, no gunshot or knife wound. From the looks of it…I’d say she was strangled, maybe, and the drugs weren’t helping either.”

“Has she been identified yet?” Nick asked and bravely circled the bed to get a different angle. His nerves weren’t so bad when he forced them back down. After all, he had a job to do. The young African American woman was on her back on the bed, limbs lying in awkward positions. She wore a peach colored tank top, but her bottom half was covered by the sheets.

“Yeah. Her name is Mindy Carlisle, 26 years old. Doesn’t live here, though; at least that’s what it says on her driver’s license. Supposedly, she lives off of I-95 out west. The only things I found in her purse were a couple condoms and some paraphernalia, but not much else. She was probably a hooker or something.”

“…How long until the coroner arrives?”

The detective glanced at his watch and sighed. “’Bout 5…10 minutes tops. Since we’ve got a troop of people needing to be here, we don’t want everyone in at the same time. Forensics will be hanging for a while, though, so try to keep out of their way and don’t touch anything you don’t need to…you know the drill.”

“Thanks,” Gavin said and turned to find Nick leaning in closer, staring at something. He watched as his partner frowned, and instead of inspecting the body, found himself studying Nick. “By your intense concentration, I’d say you’ve picked up a scent, Lassie.”

“I think…” Nick began, ignoring the joke and shifted into a different position. He couldn’t tell exactly what he was looking at and needed to get a closer look. A box of gloves sat on top of the waist-high bureau, only snatching one to pull over his right hand. This time, Nick came to his knees, eye-level with the woman’s body and pointed at something that stuck out from under her. “I think there’s a condom under here.”

Gavin knelt down beside him. “Well I’ll be damned,” he said. “It looks like it’s been used.”

“There’s blood on it, too.” Nick looked up and glanced around the room, spotting a young man holding a camera. “Hey,” Nick called out. “The body’s been photographed already, right?”

“Yeah.”

“There’s something under here I’d like to get a closer look at.”

“Sure,” the younger man nodded and fetched one of his fellow team members. Nick snatched a latex glove from a box in one of the toolboxes, waiting until he got the go ahead after every pertinent piece of information was recorded.

He barely had to lift the left side of the victim’s torso to pull the object out from under her, but a closer look confirmed their suspicions. “The blood is on the outside,” Gavin noted. “Probably hers.”

“It’s definitely been used,” Nick said as he left it to the team to collect and properly label. He slipped the glove off of his hand, disposing of it and stepped back to take one good look at the room before getting to work.

“Well,” Gavin slapped him on the shoulder, “Ready to do this?”

- -

Another hour gone and the idea of taking a break sounded more than tempting. Nick sighed heavily, leaned back in his chair and combed his hands through his hair. He wanted nothing more than to curl up somewhere and sleep, if only for a few minutes, but there was much to be done. Alone inside the room, Nick had parked himself at the table against the wall closest to the door; a box with the victim’s name sat in front of him, as well as a mess of envelopes.

He glanced up when the door swung opened and Gavin appeared, most likely having just gotten back from dealing with other matters.

“Find anything interesting?”

“They’re just love letters, from what I gather,” Nick replied; his tone sounded a bit thwarted by the fact.

“Something juicy, I hope?” Gavin asked with a smirk and sat across the table from Nick.

“I checked it earlier and we’re almost positive this is Mindy’s handwriting. It matches a note that was found in her purse, but we’ve yet to get that fully confirmed. But, going with the assumption, the letters are made out to a guy named Syd. They get pretty intense, so I assume they must have some sort of romantic connection.”

Gavin frowned and pursed his lips, repeating the name aloud.

“…Did you find out who the owner of the apartment was?”

“No, actually, I didn’t.”

“No?”

Sighing, Gavin leaned further against the back of the chair. He was tired from the looks of it as well. “When I confronted the landlord about tracking down the tenant, he started acting weird, hesitant almost. Turns out he was hiding the fact that the name on the rental agreement is a fake. The rest of his information is still being tacked down, but I’m sure something else is going on. Whoever owns the apartment is living in it under an assumed identity, and until we can find out who, the only thing we can rely on is what forensics found at the scene.”

Yet another thing to add to the list of obstacle.

“Well, whoever it is, it’s probably not the guy living in the apartment. I got a sense, judging by some of the things that were said in these letters, that whoever this Syd guy is might be a secret; it kind of sounds as though she’s trying to be inconspicuous about it.”

“Love affair, maybe?”

Nick shrugged. It was a possibility, but they had no clue who they were dealing with; just the thought made his head throb.

“You look tired,” Gavin pointed out. Nick hadn’t realized it until the blond spoke up that he’d been staring at him and shot his gaze back to the letters. “You’ve done enough today. Why don’t you head home?”

Earlier, Nick had excused himself to check into the motel, which is when they had parted ways. He hadn’t bother to tell Gavin what business it was he departing to tend to, however, and thought it somewhat pertinent to let the man know that he would be in town, at least for the week.

“I uh, got myself a motel room, actually,” Nick said. He busied himself with collecting the letters instead of having to make eye contact with his partner. “I did all the packing I could at the apartment; thought I might as well stay in town to take care of a few things.”

“Oh, well, that’s a good idea.” Now a heavy awkwardness hung in the air—it was getting personal. Gavin shifted upright again, but couldn’t meet Nick’s gaze. “You do have to find a place to live, after all. Have you started looking yet?”

“Not really…”

“I guess you have been busy.” Silence blanketed the room, ringing loudly in Nick’s ears. He wasn’t exactly up for a friendly chat with this man he’d known for a little over a week, but Gavin didn’t seem to be pushing the subject too hard…or so he thought. “I know this may sound forward, but I could point you right direction as to where you might want to be looking. It’s a lot of work when you don’t know the area, but I wouldn’t mind making the task a bit easier.”

It certainly was forward and definitely not something Nick expected to hear. How could Gavin have become so comfortable to suggest such a thing? With what courtesy he could muster, Nick felt the only thing he could do was decline the offer, but he didn’t know how. In fact, he wasn’t even sure if he had the guts to.

“I don’t know…that’s asking a lot of you. I can take care of things myself…”

“Well, tomorrow is going to be slow and then comes the weekend. Might as well utilize what resources you have before things get crazy again. When those tests get back, I’m sure we’ll be in over our heads.” Gavin stood from the table and was heading for the door before Nick could stop him. “Just think about it. You can give me a call if you want. It’s not a problem, so whenever’s good for you.”

Nick wanted to say something; he wanted to tell Gavin not to bother yet the words were just not there; and then he was gone, out the door, down the hall before Nick even had a chance. He let out a sigh, alone again. This would definitely be on his mind for the rest of the night…

- -

The lingering smell of spaghetti greeted Gavin as he stepped inside the apartment, shutting the door behind him. It made him feel somewhat guilty for coming home so late, and even more so when the man appeared from around the corner still sporting his black chefs apron.

“I’m sorry, Cole,” Gavin apologized immediately, setting his keys on the small table in the entryway.

“I drive an hour to come see you and don’t even have the decency to call and tell me you’ll be home late,” the taller man said; a slight smirk tugged at the corner of his lips. He crossed his arms over his chest and leaned in the doorway of the kitchen, watching as Gavin grab a bottle of water out of the fridge.

“I know I should’ve called, but we had a break in the case this morning and I lost track of time…” He was at the cupboard now, rummaging between the mugs for something way in the back.

Cole shook his head and sighed. “I don’t even know why I bother anymore.”

“If it’s any consolation, dinner smells like it would’ve been great.” Finally, Gavin found the bottle of Tylenol he was looking for and popped two of them into his mouth followed by a swig of water. He threw his head back to help coax the pills down his throat and braced himself over the counter as it settled. He hadn’t noticed that Cole had moved behind him, but nearly jumped when he felt a pair of hands snaking around his waist. Suddenly, Gavin could feel Cole’s body push against his back, trapping him in between the counter.

“I would have preferred to eat it with you,” Cole murmured softly. He pressed his lips against the crook of Gavin’s neck, making the shorter man sigh. As busy a day as Gavin had, he couldn’t very well turn his back on the chance to spend at least the rest of the night with Cole. Tomorrow morning, he would be catching a flight to Los Angeles and their visits were scarce enough already.

“You’ve already missed dinner,” Cole began. Turning in his arms, Gavin faced the taller man. “Come to bed with me?” Gavin nodded without hesitation. He took his hand in the other man’s and led them straight to the bedroom without a word. Although dark, there was enough light shining through the window to know where to place his hands. They stood at the foot of the bed, Cole took Gavin into his arms to resume what they had put on hold in the kitchen––a kiss, much more eager than before.

Gavin wasted no time in kicking off his shoes, and before he knew it, they were on the bed. Gavin watched fixedly as Cole inched up his body, crawling over him like a predator ready to take the final move on his prey. He met those big blue eyes and Gavin could’ve sworn he spotted a mischievous twinkle in them.

[Bun]

Chapter Five

The house they pulled up to was located off of the freeway, as the victims identification indicated; a small, 2-story, dwelling with chipping white paint and a dark roof. The grass out front was greenish brown, though neatly trimmed and one car sat out in the driveway covered in dew.

Gavin stepped away from the door after knocking a few times, then an older woman with features reminiscent of the victim answered. “Mrs. Carlisle?”

“Yes…?”

“My name is detective Shaw,”—a flash of identification—“My partner, detective McCarthy. I believe you were informed we would be dropping by. This isn’t a bad time, is it?”

“Oh, no…come in,” she replied, stepping aside so they could enter the house.

“I’m very sorry about your daughter.”

“…Thank you.” The woman paused, wearing a solemn expression. Her face was drooping, the whites of her eyes were red and dark circles shadowed them; quite obviously, she had lost a bit of sleep in the last few days. From the doorway, Mrs. Carlisle led them to the small den where she offered them a seat. Both Nick and Gavin took a place on the couch. “You saw her, didn’t you? You’re the detectives overseeing her case?”

“That’s right.”

“I was only asked to identify the body, but they never gave me all the details. Can you tell me…did she suffer or was she…?”

“Uh…” Unsure of how to answer, Gavin glanced over his shoulder at Nick who returned the look, just as clueless as he was. “Well, we haven’t received the findings of the toxicology report yet, but according to a suspect we just interviewed she had been using. While we don’t know how she reacted to them on a regular basis, it’s very plausible she was unaware or at least numb to what was happening.”

“I see;” a small smile tugged at the corner of her lips. She seemed to be happy to hear that. “Then I suppose the drugs were good for one thing.”

“She was a drug addict, I’m assuming?”

“Completely. They took over her life, got us into some money problems trying to take care of her, but we were just as much to blame. The councilor called it enabling. I guess he was right.”

“Did she live at the apartment she was found in?”

“No, it was her boyfriend’s…”

“Then she lived here?”

“She did until I kicked her out.”

“Did she tell you where she was going after this happened?”

“She couldn’t have made it clearer if she wrote it in the sky. She was always telling me how bad of a mother I was, that her ‘man’ treated her so much better and actually cared about her. It broke my heart to hear her say that to my face. And I hated having to tell her no, but it was just a bunch of drama we didn’t need.” The older woman chuckled with a hint of scorn behind it. “I thought for sure it would be the drugs that took my baby from me…”

“…Mrs. Carlisle, about your daughter’s boyfriend, Jackie Oleander?”

“I hate that name,” she spat.

“Have you ever met Jackie before?”

“No, but Mindy would always talk about him; she was in love with him and couldn’t see anything else. I knew exactly what he was doin’, too, ‘cause of all the gossip around town—some friends of mine, their kids are junkies, too. But I got to know the name differently.”

“To your knowledge, was she using before she met Jackie?”

Mrs. Carlisle frowned and looked away, racking her brain for the answer. “I don’t think so. She could have been doing other things, lighter stuff, but there was a big change when they were together. I’m pretty sure he was the one who got her hooked. I know it was her choice in the end, but if she’d found herself a decent man she might still be here.”

“Did she ever talk to you about him? Mention anything in regards to his line of work? Friends? Anything personal?”

“…Well, at first, when I thought she was clean. Nothing was complicated and we got along and talked, but it was never anything about what Jackie did, just how happy she was with him. As soon as she started showing signs that she’d been using, we started to drift apart. The only time she came back home was when she didn’t have any money or needed a place to stay for the night.”

“So you never heard anything about him?”

“Nothing more than a stranger would know.”

“Did she ever mention a man by the name of Sydney Park?”

It was hard to tell by the look on her face what Mrs. Carlisle was thinking. She’d stopped talking and shot a few hesitant glances to the kitchen doorway. The older woman didn’t excuse herself when she stood up from the couch and left Gavin and Nick wondering where she was headed. She returned after a few moments to hand the blond a piece of paper with something scribbled on it.

“I thought the name sounded familiar…do you think it’s him?”

Syd was all it said, followed by a number.

“Maybe,” Gavin replied and asked her if he could keep it. She nodded.

“Mindy had so many friends calling the house, and at all hours, too. It drove me nuts. I had to unplug the phones from the wall at one point.”

“I see…”

He finished writing something on a notepad he kept before realizing there wasn’t much else the woman could do for them, and she knew by the silence that had fallen over them. Gavin then stood from the couch and so did Nick, ready to pursue the next route.

“Thank you, Mrs. Carlisle.”

“I’m sorry I couldn’t be much of a help,” she said, stopping at the front door.

“Quite the contrary,” Gavin smiled and turned to leave but was stopped when she added one more thing.

“Whoever did this…I want you to catch them and throw them behind bars for what they did to Mindy…”

Gavin simply nodded, not wanting to promise anything and followed Nick down the walkway back to where their car sat parked on the other side of the street. Inside, they both buckled up and sat in the car before taking off; listening to the engine humming softly. After a few moments, Gavin pulled into traffic but headed the opposite way of the department.

“Where are we going?” Nick asked. The further they drove, the less idea he had of where he was.

“I want to show you something,” was Gavin’s only reply, but the smirk he wore was slightly unnerving.

- -

Nick glanced at his partner and then to the quaint, 2-story brick building they had parked in front of. “What is this—?”

“I thought, since we have some time before we have to head back to the department, that you could get a head start on the apartment hunting.”

“Gavin…why did you do this?”

“Because, I know you’re working your ass off and there’s got to be no way you’re able to spare enough time to actually look for a place. Wouldn’t want you to settle for some atrocity you found online and never even got to see before you moved in.”

As shocked and speechless as Nick was, he knew Gavin had a point. Still, the gesture seemed like quite a stretch.

“You really didn’t have to do this.”

“I know I didn’t, but I wanted to,” the blond said, killing the engine. “Besides, I know some people that feed off of recommendations; it’s the only way their tenants get a lease and they’ll have nothing else if not an extensive background and credit check.”

“This has got to be too good to be true.”

“Not necessarily. They just want to preserve the idea of a peaceful community, and they manage to keep the real estate business alive by doing so; the neighborhoods are pretty nice. Hell, it’s how I found my place. Been there about 4 years now.”

“…Gavin, seriously.”

“Well, we’re already here.” Gavin laughed, unbuckled himself and went to step out of the car. “Come on!”
- -

A woman in her late fifties stood on the steps, waiting for them. She wore a dark dress and long peacoat that reached the hem, black stockings and a scarf to match. Gavin stepped up to her first, extending a hand which she shook and did the same with Nick.

“Susan? Thank you for meeting us.”

“It’s not a problem,” she said with a smile, then turned to Nick. “Now that we’re all here, shall we?”

~

“…The total size of this unit 820 square feet. It has hardwood floors throughout; two bedrooms—master and guest, though the latter is a tad bit smaller; one and a half bath, living and dining room, fireplace, central air conditioning…”

“This is too much,” Nick began to say when Gavin placed a hand on his shoulder and interrupted his train of thought.

“Don’t reject it so fast. There’s still a lot more to see!” he said, moving into another room with an enthusiasm like Nick hadn’t seen since he watched those home videos of Christmas day.

“You should listen to your friend,” Susan agreed and hooked an arm around Nick’s. “Come to the balcony with me. You can see the harbor from here.” She slid out from under his arm to pull the sliding glass door open and stepped aside to let Nick out first. “My husband owns a boat and keeps it just off into the distance. Sometimes you can see the mast on a clear day, through the others. It seems impossible, I know, but he’s tied a big red bow around it for me. Do you like the water, Mr. McCarthy?”

“It’s not so bad. I grew up in Seattle on Elliot Bay.”

“Ah, yes. I haven’t been there myself, but my husband travels extensively. He sends me postcards every time he’s there and it looks beautiful.”

“It is.”

“I hope to go myself one day,” Susan said as she glanced over the rooftops of the other buildings. She finally turned to face him, leaning on one elbow against the same wrought iron railing that was out front. “You seem like a very nice young man, Mr. McCarthy.” Susan turned to face him, pausing a moment to gather her thoughts. She lowered her tone as if intending to keep it a secret between them. “I won’t say this to all of my customers, but there’s something about you… Even if you don’t choose this particular unit, I hope you find one that you’ll be able to enjoy.” Susan snickered softly. “Your friend seems eager to help you, anyway.”

That made Nick smile, though he tried to fight it back. She was an odd woman, for sure, but managed to get a chuckle out of him. They were soon interrupted by Gavin who joined them out in the freezing cold temperatures.

“There you guys are. What are you doing out here? I thought we came to see the place and you’ve only been through the living room so far.”

“All right, all right,” Nick sighed, following his partner back inside. For once in a long time, longer than he could remember, Nick let out a genuine laugh. So much time had passed since his loss that he wasn’t sure if he was even capable of doing it anymore, but it felt good to allow himself such a simple pleasure.

After seeing the rest of the apartment and calculating a few numbers, Nick left with Susan Whitaker’s business card and followed Gavin back to his car. He was surprised to find the next few places they visited to be so close, and thoroughly enjoyed each of them in some way or another. It was the fact that he wasn’t going to be picky about the decision that made it harder for Nick to side on one specifically. The only thing he wanted was to get away from that old apartment, and that left him with a handful of options.

The day eventually wound down and they’d seen everything they set out to see.

Back in the car, Gavin waited, letting the engine run idle to get things warmed up.

“I know you’ve been forced to spend the whole day with me,” the blond began, “but it’s been hours and you’ve got to be hungry.”

“I could go for something to eat,” Nick replied, though it surprised Gavin to see how easily the dark-haired man opened to the idea. He’d been so reserved and unwilling for the first week, but there was no doubt in Gavin’s mind that he was beginning to wear off on him.

“Well, I’m a man of many tastes and I don’t think Aggie works on Saturday’s. There’s a nice, quiet little restaurant a couple blocks over if you’re interested?”

“Sounds good to me...” Nick murmured and stared out the window.

- -

Compared to the hole-in-the-wall diner Gavin took him to the first time, this restaurant was on the other end of the scale and Nick could’ve sworn he felt a painful ache coming from his wallet. He said nothing, however, following the waitress to their secluded table.

“So, which one do you like best?” Gavin asked, speaking as he read through the menu.

Nick glanced up at the man, unsure of what he was referring to and that seemed to be written all over his face.

“Of the apartments!”

“Right,” Nick said with a nod. He placed his menu down in front of him, having already made up his mind before they arrived.

“Well?”

He found himself at a loss and shrugged instead. “I don’t know. They were all livable.”

“Livable?” Gavin laughed at his choice of words. “In all honesty, and this is just my opinion, but, I think you should go with the first one. It’s a great price, good neighborhood, still in the downtown area and wow, the view?”

“It was pretty nice.”

“Pretty nice? Hell, if you don’t take it I might just break my lease and snatch it up myself,” he joked and smiled when the waitress returned. She took their orders without having to write it on a pad and quickly scurried away again. “Not that it’s any of my business to be pushing you, but it’s obviously a steal.”

“Yeah..."

Gavin spotted it as soon as it hit; that gloomy cloud that seemed to linger whenever Nick got in one of those moods. He’d seen it before when they first pulled up to the apartment, but for a few hours, it seemed to disappear. Now, Nick was thinking again. About what, though, was beyond Gavin. He couldn’t outright ask what it was that was bothering the man—with anyone else, of course, but not Nick. For now, he would have to keep their conversation light hearted, and wracked his brain for something else they could focus on in hopes of bringing Nick out of the rut he’d fallen into.

~

The door closed shut behind him and the window rolled down before he could walk off Scott free without saying a word. Nick turned to glance into the car as Gavin leaned over the passenger seat.

“I, uh…thanks.”

“It was my pleasure,” Gavin replied, smiling. “I’ll see you on Monday then?”

Nick nodded. “Monday it is.” The window rolled up and the car drove away, disappearing into the traffic that whizzed by. A powerful chill racked through Nick’s body and he shivered violently, hunching his shoulders up to brace the cold. He wasted no time rushing back to his room to get warm.

[Bun]

Chapter Six

As always, Gavin arrived a bit earlier than his partner, which gave him some time to get settled in before they would need to get down to business. He hung his coat on the rack and went to his desk to boot up his computer, then pulled open the top drawer of his desk in hopes of finding the report he wasn’t sure where he’d left two days prior. Around his area and in the far corners of the office, Gavin searched high and low, but to no avail. He figured he would try looking in Nick’s area having turned up empty handed and began to shuffle around the desk when his eyes drifted to a picture sitting near the pencil holder.

“Hey, Gavin, I didn’t see you come in,” a voice said. The detective glanced up to find Scorsani walking into the office. “When’d you get here?”

Jim Scorsani was his name, one of the fellow detectives he and Nick shared the office with. He was a married man, however, and spent what free time he could at home. It wasn’t a rarity to cross paths, when they were stuck at the department filing papers or attending meetings, but it was certainly not as much as Gavin saw Nick.

“Just now.”

“Hey, I’ve been meaning to ask you—how is that new partner of yours? I’ve only met him once, officially, and we see each other every now and then, but I haven’t really had a chance to talk to him. He seems kinda closed off.”

Jim’s assumption wasn’t far off from the truth, but with being the overbearing individual Gavin was, it didn’t take much to get through.

“He’s a nice guy,” Gavin said, catching sight of the picture of the woman sitting on Nick’s desk. He knew he’d seen her before, though he couldn’t remember where for the life of him. She even looked like the spitting image of Nick, too.

“Well, we should all go out for drinks or something, maybe? My wife owes me a night with the guys and I’ve been anxious to use it. I think we all could stand for a few drinks after how busy things’ve been.”

“Yeah,” the blond murmured, straining to think of where he’d seen this woman before. Then it hit him; the connection he’d been looking for.

“Anyway, I gotta scram. Just picked up a suspect and they’re waiting for me in the interrogation room. I’ll see you later!” Jim said, rushing out the door. When he was alone again, Gavin moved quickly to his desk and went straight for the internet, opening the browser for a new search.

Baltimore and McCarthy were two of the words he used to direct the search engine, which turned up a bunch of useless crap he had to sift through. Then he saw the headlines.

Assistant DA found murdered in home; no suspects revealed.

Another…

Double homicide claims the lives of Baltimore detective and assistant DA.

And another…

ADA McCarthy case gone cold; detectives are stumped.

“Oh, fuck me,” Gavin whispered as he let his weight fall back into the chair. He didn’t realize it at first, but his heart was thumping in his chest like a hammer against metal and his hands were shaking. He wasn’t sure if he should be surprised, confused, disgusted, angry or every one of those. It didn’t matter, though, when Gavin started to panic at the thought of when his partner would arrive. He thought he should close the browser, but Valerie’s pictures were plastered all over the page following a brief description of what information the press was given.

“Morning,” a voice said as if on cue. It startled Gavin and he jumped in his seat; half sitting, half standing, unsure of what position he should be in.

“What’s the matter with you?” Nick asked and approached the blond where he sat at his desk. It was too late for Gavin to close out of the pages and Nick caught a glimpse of what was on the screen. “This…what the hell?”

“Nick, listen, before you get angry—”

“Why are you looking at this?” His brown eyes focused on the headlines, squinting at the picture of Valerie they’d taken a few months before the murder.

“I didn’t mean to, I…”

Gavin stood upright, stumbling over his words as Nick turned away. He didn’t like the fact that he couldn’t see the look on Nick’s face; it made him uneasy.

“…Jesus Christ,” he thought he heard the other man whisper, but he couldn’t be too sure.

“Nick, let me explain!”

Without even knowing it, things had spiraled completely out of his control. One moment Nick was strolling into the office, unaware of what awaited for him on the other side, and the next he was on the floor, knees drawn up to his chest, head resting in his arms. His breathing had gone ragged and he was trembling even, sitting with his back against the wall, curled up like a frightened child.

“Nick?” Gavin spoke softly, coming to his knees beside his partner. He wanted to touch him, place a hand on his back and comfort him but the thought seemed risky considering there was no way to tell how Nick would react.

Quickly, Gavin realized that Nick wasn’t even paying attention and had retreated somewhere far away from the office. He had been talking, but the man never replied, never gave a verbal or physical response; not even a sign that he could hear his voice.

“Hey, come on…Nick? Snap out of it.”

There was no answer and that worried the hell out of Gavin.

Sliding closer now, the blond leaned down in hopes of getting a glance at Nick’s face. It barely registered when he had unconsciously placed his hand on Nick’s shoulder which was shrugged away; at least it was a sign.

“Listen to me.”

His voice croaked from his throat, a low growl as if it were a warning.

“You had no right to stick your nose in my business.”

“I wasn—okay, fine…maybe I was! But would you just listen for a second?” Gavin spat, raising his voice a bit and shot into a standing position. “I was looking for that report I left over the weekend, but I couldn’t find it, so I tried looking around your area and I noticed you’d put up a picture of her.” He pointed, emphasizing his reference to the woman on the desk.

When there was no reply, Gavin continued.

“I knew I’d seen her face before, ‘cept I wasn’t sure where. And…well, curiosity got the best of me. She looks a bit like you, too, so I figured you were related. I did a search just out of interest and it turns out I had seen her before, in the papers and all over the news. But I didn’t make the connection between you two until later, I swear!”

A frown still pulled at Nick’s features, but he didn’t seem to be as angry anymore; not at Gavin, in any case. Still, he didn’t say a word.

“I know this looks bad.” Gavin paused and stared at Nick—Nick who looked so small and vulnerable, unlike the man he’d met a week ago; stoic and preserved. “But you’ve got to believe me when I say I didn’t mean for things to turn out like this. I didn’t realize...”

A chilling silence blanketed the room and the only thing Gavin wanted to do was say something, anything that might alleviate the awkwardness between them. It taunted him, rang loudly in his ears and drove him insane. He was surprised, however, when Nick finally picked himself up from the ground, but the man was heading for the door instead, leaving without a word.

~

Water poured from the silver faucet into the sink, swirling about the white porcelain and eventually down into the drain. The cold, clear liquid helped to sooth him enough that he could calm himself, but Nick still felt a bit nauseated from what had happened only a few moments ago.

He wasn’t expecting to react in such a way. In fact, he wasn’t expecting the issue would ever come up, and therefore, made a bit of sense in his otherwise senseless world. After so long, Nick thought he’d found some way to function throughout the day without losing his mind every time the subject came up, but that assumption went right out the window, with his self control and everything else.

At least he could be alone in the bathroom for a few minutes. It was a slight comfort and a nightmare rolled into one. Nick put up a front for the main purpose of driving people away from him, yet the only thing he needed now was physical contact; a pair of arms to hold and comfort him, maybe—anything would do. And there he was, alone, staring at himself in the mirror, watching the streams of water roll down his unnaturally pale face. 10 minutes had passed since he left the office, and he half expected the door to fly open and Gavin would appear. The worried look on his face was enough to tell Nick that he was being genuine with his words; concern, something Nick had not sense from anyone in quite a while.

S’now or never, Nick thought and grabbed a paper towel from the dispenser to wipe his face. Out of the bathroom, he walked casually down the hall, though cautious in his steps, keeping a watchful eye at everyone who passed by. They didn’t seem to notice anything unusual, but Nick only felt slightly safer back in the office. Now he was faced with a different and more difficult task of confronting his partner.

Gavin sat at attention in his chair having been leaning on his elbow, still sporting that worried expression. He didn’t say anything, though, and waited for Nick to initiate the conversation.

The door shut softly in his wake. Nick paused briefly before doing anything, then moved to his own desk where he took a seat at the edge, back deliberately turned away from his sister’s smiling face.

“This would’ve happened eventually,” Nick began, though he wasn’t sure if it was the right place to start.

“I’m really sorry…”

“Don’t. Don’t do that. It’s not your fault.” He moved across the room to his desk and sat down heavily in his chair. “I guess I’ve been avoiding it…”

“But you shouldn’t!” Gavin protested and rose from his seat. He pulled back a bit when he realized he might be coming on too strong and continued. “Not that it’s any of my business… Maybe it’s better now that it’s out in the open?”

“Maybe…”

There it was again; the same dejection in his voice, so consuming. It was driving Gavin insane.

In the corner of his vision, Nick spotted Gavin approaching him. The blond stopped a reasonable distance away, but there was that closeness he felt before the day of the crime scene investigation.

“We could talk about it or somethi—” Gavin began, only to be interrupted by a set of knocks. The door swung open and in walked Reese, holding a manila folder.

“I hope you boys aren’t too busy.”

“No, sir,” replied Gavin, then motioned to what was in the lieutenant’s hand. “What’s that?”

“The autopsy report of the recent victim…amongst other things. I’d like to discuss this with both of you.”


Once the lieutenant was settled in a seat, he placed the folder on his lap and began. “As we suspected, the young woman, Ms. Carlisle, did not reside at the home she was found in. It turns out she was just involved with the man and lived at her mother’s before the murder. After speaking to a few neighbors, it was collectively agreed upon that the girl was there quite a bit, as were many other people.”

“So did you find out who it was?” Gavin asked.

“Jackson White, though you may know him as Jackie Oleander. We’ve known of him and his business importing and exporting illegal substances from a few states, but we’ve never been able to make the connection until now. He’s never bought or leased any property, has no credit cards; nothing other than a driver’s license and that, he received nearly 20 years ago. But the thing is he’s nowhere to be found. His neighbors say they think he left a day or two before the murder and never came back. There is security footage of the parking lot, which we haven’t gotten through entirely just yet, but it seems as though the hearsay is turning out to be true.”

“What about the two sets of DNA on the victim’s body? Have they been identified?”

“Yes. Their names are Cal Rogers and Sydney Park.”

“Sydney Park,” Nick echoed, suddenly interrupting the conversation. He met Reese’s gaze who didn’t seem terribly surprised by the reaction; almost like he was expecting it, but the lieutenant continued to explain.

“He’s infamously known around Baltimore as being quite the business man himself. His specialty is firearms, but he’s dabbled in illegal substances as well. This is his first suspected murder, however.”

“Maybe not,” Nick said and stood from his chair. At his desk now, he rummaged through his drawers. Somewhere in the room, a phone rang and Reese excused himself to answer it. Having found whatever Nick was searching for—what looked like a tiny black book—Gavin approached his partner to inquire about his unusual behavior.

“What’re you doing?” Gavin asked, lowering his tone, deliberately trying to make it harder for Reese to hear what he was saying.

“We need to find this guy Sydney,” Nick murmured back.

“And how are we gonna do that? He’s disappeared, and understandably so. Chances are he’s long gone if he really did have a hand in murdering that woman…”

Nick didn’t say a word, just stood very closely, unmoving next to his partner. Behind them, the lieutenant spoke on his phone in the corner of the room near the door.

“I’ll find him.”

“Don’t be unreasonable here. You know that could take a while.”

“I’m not—” Nick stopped himself having spoken the words a bit louder than he intended to and lowered his tone. “I’m not being unreasonable.”

“Well, you’re obviously not thinking clearly…”

The statement was met with a scowl. For whatever reason, Gavin wasn’t sure, he had offended the man. At that moment, Reese had ended his call and stood waiting for the detective’s to finish whatever business they were discussing. Nick glanced over Gavin’s shoulder and shut the top draw he’d been rummaging through, focusing his attention on the lieutenant.

“Sorry about that, I’m needed to speak with the chief. If you two could take a handle on these…?” Reese handed the manila folders to Gavin who accepted them and turned to meet Nick’s gaze. Alone in the office again, Nick snatched his keys and the rest of his things, headed for the door.

“Where are you going?” Gavin asked.

“To see an old friend,” Nick replied, stopping just before he could step into the hall when Gavin didn’t follow immediately. “You coming or not?”

- -

It took them nearly an hour to get to where they were going; a hole-in-the-wall pawnshop up north close to where Nick used to live, but it wasn’t a place that Gavin had ever been to before, so he let his partner take the lead on this one.

They rushed inside out of the cold and the moment the bell chimed overhead as they passed through the doorway, the man behind the counter looked up from what he was doing. His eyes went wide and his mouth hung slack, no doubt surprised to see a familiar face.

He stumbled to get the words out, “N-Nick,” and laughed nervously, going rigid in his posture. The clerk wasn’t doing much of a good job trying to be nonchalant; by his reaction, it was obvious just how nerve-racked he was. “I thought you’d been kicked off the force or somethin’. What brings you here?”

“I was transferred and that’s none of your business,” Nick spoke in a soft tone, stepping closer to the counter while the man took a step back. “You know why I’m here.” The only thing Gavin could do was stand back and watch the scene play out before him.

“I haven’t seen you for a while. What’s up?”

“Don’t play coy with me, Teddy.”

“I swear to God, I don’t know nothin’.”

Unbelievable, Gavin thought. It was true he hadn’t known Nick for very long, but it was just as surprising to see this other side of him.

Nick let out a heavy sigh and fought the urge to reach for his weapon. It would’ve been a bad idea in front of his partner, but mostly because it was against protocol.

“In the back,” Nick said, making a gesture to the door on the left. Teddy looked at the door and then back to the dark-haired man.

“No, hey, we don’t gotta do this.”

“Yes, we do.”

“Don’t you think,” Teddy laughed, “you’re being a little unreasonable here?” The man was visibly shaking now, although the reason as to why he was so frightened was not so clear. Gavin had no idea about their history and he couldn’t outright ask at a time like this.

Nick spoke more slowly this time, accenting his words though his stern tone remained the same, perhaps even more threatening. “I’m not going to ask you again. Get out from behind the counter and into that room before I take you in there myself.”

Teddy hesitated a moment, shooting a glance at Gavin, then back to where Nick stood. He nodded and obliged, slipping into the room as Nick excused them for a brief moment.

From behind, Teddy felt a hand shove him forward and he nearly tripped, catching himself on the edge of the table before his face hit first. It was true, they hadn’t spoken to teach other for nearly a year, but nothing in the shop had changed since then.

“Jackie Oleander,” Nick said. “You know of him, don’t you?”

“Look,” Teddy began, “I haven’t done any business with the guy in months if that’s what you’re talkin’ about.”

“That’s not what I asked.”

“Okay. Yeah, yeah I know him.”

“A woman was killed in his apartment a few days ago.” It would be all over the news soon anyway, and Teddy wasn’t exactly the kind of guy to spread gossip. “Did you know about that?”

“No…I didn’t.”

“Well, he wasn’t there when it happened. Apparently, he had already left a day or two before; at least that’s what his neighbors are saying.”

“So what does this have to do with me?”

“Sydney Park.”

Teddy blinked at the name, surprised, unsure of what to say.

“His DNA was found on the body, but ironically enough, he’s disappeared, too.”

“And you think I know where he is?”

“I think you know exactly where he is,” Nick snarled, leaning in closer to scare the man a bit. It seemed to be working. “That or you’ve caught wind of where he might be headed. You two got along pretty well, so I heard…from James.”

That name; it was well known all over town and Teddy was no exception.

“Oh, y-yeah…”

“I need to know where Sydney went, Teddy.”

“I don’t know.”

“Bullshit…”

“Seriously, I couldn’t tell ya—”

Before he could get the rest of the word out, in one swift move, Teddy found himself being shoved onto the table with Nick holding one fist full of his shirt and the other pressing the barrel of a gun to his forehead.

“Bullshit!” Nick shouted this time and forced the barrel down harder. A fire burned behind his eyes, fierce and filled with anger, something almost carnal to it.

“Okay, okay!” Teddy cried, squeezing his eyes shut. “Jesus Christ, don’t shoot!”

“Then tell me what I need to know!!”

Teddy nodded furiously. He would do it if only to save his life. “H-he said somethin’ about meetin’ Jackie in Philly, that he’d been gone for a few days and wasn’t sure when he’d be back in town. But he never mentioned anything about what happened to the girl, I swear!”

“And what about Rogers?”

“Who?!”

“You don’t know him? Cal Rogers?”

“No, I never heard of the guy!”

Nick believed what Teddy was saying only because of the looming possibility that he would have a bullet through his head if he didn’t answer truthfully. Neither man had enough time to realize what was happening when the door flew open behind them and in stepped Gavin.

He seemed to be just as surprised as Teddy had been at the sight of the weapon, but Gavin pulled Nick off of the frightened store owner and kept a firm grasp on the man; the least he could do was apologize for barging in, though a simple apology seemed inadequate for having a gun shoved in his face.

“Sorry to bother you. We’ll be out of your hair now.”

Leading them out of the store, Gavin let go of Nick’s arm when they made it outside. Neither of them said a word until they got into the car.

“Areyououtofyourmind?!” Gavin hissed, spitting out the words fast enough that they streamed together.

“He told me what I needed to know…”

“Yeah, but you didn’t have to pull your gun on him! What would’ve happened if you lost your cool?” It was difficult, but Gavin stopped himself before he could go on a rant and let out a heavy sigh. When he had found his composure, Gavin continued. “…Nevermind. Just…let me know when you feel the need to do that next time, alright?”

He was met with silence as Nick sat leaning as far into his corner as he could, deliberately avoiding eye contact.

“You said he knew where Sydney is?”

“In Philadelphia…meeting with Jackie.”

“What for?”

Nick shrugged, “I don’t know.”

“We have to put out an APB and have their people expedite him back to Baltimore if they catch him.”

“They may not be able to. Besides, he’s supposedly leaving in a few days.”

“Might as well give it a try, right?” Gavin leaned forward to turn the keys and start the engine. “Anyway, I think you’ve had enough excitement for one morning…”

[Bun]

Chapter Six (cont.)

--


The car ride back to the department was an awkward one, and the atmosphere between them remained that way for a while. It was too much for Gavin to bear; to see his partner in such a state, so he decided, after taking care of some business, he would try to convince Nick to take the rest of the day off. He began with the unfortunate fact that there wasn’t much more they could do seeing as how two of the suspects were—supposedly—no longer in their jurisdiction, and the third’s whereabouts were as good as anyone’s guess. Surprisingly, it didn’t take much for Nick to agree. An aura of despondency loomed over his head like an ominous grey cloud, threatening torrents of cold, heavy rain. All Gavin could do, or what he felt he was capable of, was sit back and watch.

What he had to finish didn’t take long. Just after the sun set behind snowy clouds, Gavin rushed to the motel as fast as traffic would let him. At the door, he balled his hand into a fist, gripping the hem of the coat sleeve to fight off the cold and rapped softly. It took a moment for anyone to answer, but Nick was certainly surprised to see the blond standing there with a big grin on his face holding a box of pizza.

“This isn’t a bad time, is it?” Gavin asked and moved passed Nick, reluctantly stepping aside.

Nick hadn’t changed from earlier, still wearing his blue, long-sleeved button up shirt, top few buttons undone; no tie this time and dark slacks. He didn’t give an answer, just watched as Gavin set the pizza on the table near the window. Beside it, something caught his eyes; a file he hadn’t seen before yet looked awfully familiar.

Upon closer inspection, it looked to be something in regards to the murder of his sister. That made Gavin’s stomach drop.

“Jesus, Nick, why are you reading this?” he asked, picking up the folder to wave in the air for emphasis.

Nick sat down in the chair in the corner of the room, body slumped and hardly paying much attention.

“Why do you care?”

“…Why do I...? Are you serious?”

“It’s none of your business.”

“With it lying around in the open, I’d say it’s my business.”

“Forgive me for not tidying up,” his partner sneered. “I wasn’t expecting company tonight.”

In a scolding tone much like his mother would use, Gavin declared, “Well, it’s going away—in the drawer—and you’re gonna eat this pizza. I didn’t spend seventeen bucks on an entire meal for myself.”

“Sorry, not hungry…”

“You were with me all day, and, if I’m right, you probably didn’t get anything on your way back, either.”

“You don’t have to do this, y’know.”

“Do what?”

“Act like you care.”

Gavin took offense Nick’s heartless assumption, but he wouldn’t play into the childish behavior. “Who says I’m acting?”

“…Whatever, just…please, leave, okay…? This isn’t necessary.”

“You think I’m giving you a pity party?”

Nick shook his head, avoiding eye contact. “That’s not—”

“Eat the pizza,” ordered the blond.

“I told you, I’m not—”

“—Going to argue with me,” Gavin interrupted, and for the last time. “I am a part of this no matter how much you don’t want me to be. So you’re just gonna have to get used to the fact.” Luckily for Nick, Gavin was had enough common sense to understand they didn’t need to discuss the situation any further. He’d come there with one purpose and one purpose only, and by God, if it took him the rest of the night, he’d do whatever was necessary to keep Nick’s mind away from those thoughts. “Besides, this pizza is the best in town. I used to get it all the time when I first moved to Baltimore; can’t say I’ve had anything better.”

Gavin made a bold move by taking a seat on the bed, leaning his back against the headboard. He cross one leg over the other and set the pizza box down beside him, leaving enough room for Nick to sit on the other side. In front of him sat the remote, which he grabbed to turn the volume up on the television and flipped through the channels until he found an old sitcom. “Aw, man, I haven’t seen this in ages.”

Canned laughter echoed from the speakers, but Gavin only snickered. Out of the corner of his eye, he watched Nick push himself out of the chair and stood unmoving as if he wasn’t sure what to do next.

“Pizza’s getting cold,” Gavin said. He leaned over to enticingly pat the empty spot on the other side of the bed, never breaking his gaze with the man. Nick sucked in a deep breath of air and let it out slowly. He said nothing, but screamed surrender, taking a seat next to the pizza box. A low growl rumbled from his stomach, blowing his cover. Missing breakfast and lunch, he was hungry and understandably so.

It was hard for Nick to give in, but he grabbed a piece of pizza and took a bite.

“S’good,” he admitted.

[Bun]

Chapter Seven


Arriving early that next morning meant Nick had a chance to check on a few things that had been bothering him ever since he left work the night before. There had been one thing salient over the rest; no matter how hard he tried, he could not forget about Gavin’s unexpected visit. At first, Nick was livid. Seeing his partner standing there in front of him with that big dumb smile on his face and a pizza box nearly sent him over the edge; it was hard enough control his cool, much less refrain from shouting at the man. The thought never crossed his mind, however, that if he had made a big deal about it, Gavin would have simply thrown it back in his face. He wasn’t expecting his partner to be so assertive, but with such an overbearing personality; it made perfect sense.

As much as Nick continued to try and better understand the workings of Gavin, he knew he couldn’t mull over it the entire morning. He’d gotten as far as sitting at his desk, just about ready to peel open one of the manila folders he held in his hands when a set of knocks sounded.

“It’s open,” he called out, wondering who would be so courteous as to knock and wait like that. When the door opened, he never would have guessed who it was standing on the other side. The man from the bar that night—tall, olive skinned, with a slight tan and hair a bit longer than Nick’s—came waltzing in.

“I hope I’m not interrupting anything… Has Gavin arrived yet?”

“Uh, no,” Nick replied, sitting back in his chair. “He should be here soon, though, so make yourself comfortable until then.”

The man set his briefcase on top of Gavin’s desk, along with his overcoat and turned to face Nick who wasn’t hiding the urge to stare very well. Nick couldn’t help himself and found a set of blue eyes staring right back at him.

“We haven’t met properly,” Cole said, extending a hand to which Nick accepted and shook. “My name is Cole Werner. I’m an old friend of Gavin’s.”

“I see…”

“And you’re Nick McCarthy. Gavin does nothing but sing your praises.”

Nodding, Nick found the statement to be quite a curious one, yet remained silent. Something about the man was odd, from the way he smiled to the pressed and obviously expensive suit he wore. “Does he now?”

“Yes, well…it’s been a while since he’s had a partner, so he’s thrilled about it.”

Just then, as if on cue, the door swung open and Gavin strolled in; the wide-eyed expression he sported screamed suspicion.

“Cole…”

“Good morning!”

Gavin forced a crooked smile. Had he received a heads up about the visit beforehand, the initial shock wouldn’t have been so powerful, but he was much too focused on trying to figure out why Cole hadn’t bothered to let him know he would be swinging by.

“…What are you doing here?” Gavin asked, slipping out of his coat.

“Ah, well, I’m in town on business, had a bit of free time on my hands and I thought I’d drop by, see how things are.”

The blond nearly snorted at that and folded his arms over his chest. “Is that so?”

“Actually, there is something I wanted to discuss with you, if…it’s not a problem.” Cole then turned to where Nick was sitting and directed the question to him. “You wouldn’t mind if I borrow Gavin for a moment, would you?”

“Go for it,” was his reply, which earned him a scowl from the blond just before they stepped out of the office.

In the hall, Gavin led them to an unoccupied room where they were unlikely to be disturbed. He closed the door, flipped the lights on and faced the taller man, ready to sink his teeth in.

“What the hell are you doing here?”

Cole reeled back from the hiss and smiled. “It’s good to see you, too. I really am on business.”

“I mean what are you doing here in this building?”

“Is there something wrong with wanting to see you?” A pair of hands snaked around his waist and pulled him into an embrace, trapping his body between Cole’s and the counter behind him.

“Yeah, as a matter of fact, there is. Are you trying to rub it in his face?”

There; he’d seen that glint in the man’s eyes before but only when he was up to no good.

“Now why would I go and do something like that?”

“Because,” Gavin explained, “You’re a dirty, rotten, son of a—” only to be cut off as Cole buried his face in the crook of his neck. The man was taking in his scent, holding him close and pushing him hard against the counter on purpose.

“You know you like it.”

“…Not here.”

“Why?”

Gavin snorted, shocked by his arrogance more than anything else; though it seemed naïve that Cole could still manage to do so.

“You are such a shi…uhnn…” Only for the briefest of moments did Gavin allow Cole to do to him what he wanted. Whatever it was about the man, Gavin normally had a difficult time resisting. Perhaps it was the fact that he was still wary about the vague reason Cole had shown up that made it easier to shove the man off of him. “You’ve had your fun, now get the hell out of my sight.”

Cole did not have any intentions of letting Gavin off so easily. Just as he was about to reach for the doorknob, Gavin felt a hand clamp around his wrist, a position he could’ve easily gotten out of, and was suddenly being flung around, back pressed against the door. The way Cole came at him was even more of a surprise. He was not anticipating for the man to crush their lips together in an almost painful manner, but when Cole broke the kiss, Gavin hardly heard the door open; Cole had gone without a word.

~

Nick glanced up from the paperwork he was reading to find Gavin looking rather stunned and his clothes somewhat disheveled. That arrogant man had swung by the office to grab the things he left behind, but was still wearing that damn smirk of his that irked the hell out of Nick.

“Ahem…”

Confused, Gavin followed his partner’s gaze down to his waistline where the bottom of his shirt hanged untucked. The blond quickly shoved it into its place and went to sit down at his desk.

“Oh, by the way,” Nick began, standing from his desk to gather a few things. “Cole wanted me to tell you that he would be stopping by later to drop off some things you left at his place.”

If Gavin had been drinking something, he surely would’ve spit it out, but the only reaction he could give made him look like a deer in headlights.

“Anyway,” Nick chuckled and moved across the room, brushing behind his partner’s chair. “We’ve got a meeting to get to.”

—


His back was killing him, aching and throbbing as was every other part of his body. Sitting in that chair in front of the computer screen was not something Gavin would’ve eagerly volunteered for, but paperwork and research were two other important factors that accompanied the job.

The clock on the wall told him he had been at it for some time. He figured he was well passed due for a break and leaned back in the chair, rubbing his weary eyes with a thumb an index finger. It felt good just to close them and let his head loll backwards. That’s when it hit him hard; the exhaustion finally caught up. If there had been a couch or some oversized chair in the room he might’ve considered taking a catnap, but when the door flew open from behind, startling him, he quickly spun around in the chair to face his visitor.

Nick held a piece of folded paper in his hand which he extended to his partner. On the paper was an address, though whose was as good as anyone’s guess.

“What’s this?”

Dragging a chair next to Gavin, Nick sat down to explain. “I did a bit of digging into Sydney’s files and found a woman that has been involved in some of his business in the past. Her name is Maria Olvarez; she doesn’t have anything out for her now, but I thought maybe we could talk to her; see if she knows something?”

Gavin glanced down at the paper to read over the address one more time. It was less than ten minutes away and definitely worth a try.

~

Baling his hand into a fist, Gavin knocked hard against the door. It took a bit longer than he would have liked, but eventually an older woman poked her head out of the crack, eyeing the two suspiciously.

“Good evening; detective Shaw with the Baltimore PD,” he said, flashing his badge. “Is Maria Olvarez at home by any chance?”

“No, she not here; she did’n do anything.” The old woman knew who they were; however, she did not care what they wanted.

“I never said she did anything, ma’am; we just want to speak with her in regards to a case. We we’re hoping she could help us out.”

“No,” the woman insisted, shaking her head furiously this time. “She not home.” The woman went to slam the door, but Gavin slapped his palm against the cold wood to prevent her from shutting it completely.

“Please, this is very important. If you could only tell us where she is—” It happened quickly, but Gavin knew exactly who the shadow was that darted across the living room behind the old woman, heading straight for the kitchen. Nick spotted it as well and, having met his partner’s gaze, took off as fast as he could, bounding from the steps to the alley in pursuit of Maria.

Nick pushed the chain-link fence open and it slammed hard against the side of the building, but he paid no attention to anything other than what was in front of him. A thin film of rain coated the dirty cement under his shoes, sometimes nearly throwing him off balance, though the other obstacles were what hindered his ability to keep up with her.

Nearly missing a couple of garbage cans, Nick propelled his body forward as fast as he could to keep up with his target. He could feel his muscles start to burn after only a few minutes and his breath turned to short, heavy pants, billowing into the cold air in front of him. Amazingly enough, he managed to keep up despite it being her territory and having no prior knowledge of the layout of the area. The one thing he did know, by the smell of the sea that hung heavily in the air, was that they were heading towards the docks.

He barreled around a corner, reaching one hand out to grab the brick wall and help slow down his speed, but also to keep his balance on the slippery cement. It didn’t seem to matter when Nick lost his traction briefly and skid on a couple of loose pebbles. Nick managed to keep himself up and pumped his legs as hard as he could, rushing into open. Suddenly, the ground felt different. It was made of wood and he could hear the waves sloshing back and forth. The light on the docks was scarce, making it difficult to spot much of anything. His eyes darted back and forth between the boats and down each path the docks led, but it was no use. Nick could hardly see ten feet in front of him; knowing there were too many places Maria could be hiding in.

Just as he came to an intersection, Nick accepted the fact that he would not find the woman alone, in the dark. Though giving up seemed to be the most logical decision at the moment, Nick kept his eyes open and his steps light for the chance that Maria didn’t make it very far. Once he neared a single light post dimly showering light over the immediate area, he slowed his pace, certain he could hear a strange noise coming from behind.

A familiar voice sounded in the distance, but Nick couldn’t make out the exact words. He turned to face his partner, knowing it was Gavin yelling at him and, instead, saw Maria barreling at top speed in his direction. The surprised look on her face was enough to tell Nick that she hadn’t seen him lurking in the shadows either, but it was too late to slow down or even dodge Nick on the narrow, slippery dock.

~

We collided, hard, falling into the icy water of the harbor. The water was so cold; colder than anything I had ever felt in my life. Being completely submerged, I felt the sharp sting of the freezing water and soon after tit became increasingly difficult to breathe. I wanted to gasp and shout out, but my airways were constricted as my body trembled violently in response. Only a few seconds had passed from the moment we hit, though it felt like an eternity.

“Get a hold of yourself,” I said. “Breathe, breathe!”

My thoughts had been reduced to telling my body to do even the most basic of functions. As cold as the water was, the stinging sensation slowly began to fade away each second I spent in the water.

Beside me, Maria thrashed about aimlessly, trying her best to do exactly what I was doing. She couldn’t seem to find control over her sudden panic, however. I could only imagine how much worse it was for her given the fact that she was significantly smaller and lacking in body fat and muscle. There was no way I could think of anything other than getting her out of the water first, and swam the few feet between us. I found her arm and latched on tightly, then swam towards the dock where Gavin waited nervously above.

He knelt down to grab hold of Maria and pulled her up, and I grabbed the edge of the dock, more than ready to get out.

~

Two uniformed officers in the area had responded to the call, requesting medics on the scene when they learned that two people had plunged into the harbor. While they tended to the Maria, Gavin rushed to his partner. Nick stood hunched over and would have been stumbling if it weren’t for Gavin who held him steady. He was shivering violently, seemingly dazed and turning frightening pale color; lips blue, face white, teeth chattering.

“Can you hear me? Nick? Nick!”

Nick mumbled a response, unaware of the fact that he was slurring his words. Then he felt someone tugging at his overcoat. It was difficult with the water weighing the fabric down, but Gavin pulled it off and shrugged out of his own jacket to drape over Nick’s shoulders. It took him a moment to realize what was going on, but they were heading the opposite way from which they came; towards the staircase leading to the parking lot. The EMTs raced the rest of the distance, meeting Gavin halfway. Immediately, they grabbed Nick from Gavin’s grasp and rushed the dark-haired man to the back of the truck.

~

“How are you feeling?” the female EMT asked. She crouched down next to Nick who had been stripped of nearly all of his clothes. They’d put him in dry clothing and draped a blanket over his back; even heating up a cup of hot water and mixing in some cocoa powder to help warm him from the inside.

“Better,” Nick replied, still huddled over, cupping the mug in his palms.

“I can tell just by looking at you,” she said with a smile. In her hand, she held a disposable thermometer, “Let’s take your temperature again just to make sure,” and set it under his tongue. After a few moments, she glanced at the numbers and tossed the thermometer in the trash. “97.4—it’s looking better than it was before. Any lower and you’d have had some big problems.”

Behind them, a set of knocks sounded against the door. Gavin stood outside trying to get a better look.

“What’s the news?” he asked.

“Temperatures getting back to normal; he’s got more color in his face and his movements seem to be more fluid.”

Nick set the cup in his lap. “What about Maria?”

“She was a little bit worse off because of her small build, but she’s fine. Actually, they just took off for the department.”

“Well,” the EMT interrupted, “I’d say he’s alright to go. Just make sure you get into some warm clothing and stay out of the cold for now. I doubt things will take a turn for the worse, but hypothermia doesn’t set in until later.”

Nick brushed his slightly wavy hair, having dried naturally, out of his face and pulled the blanket around him tighter. He carefully stepped out of the back of the truck and followed closely behind his partner, still huddled over slightly to keep what warmth he’d managed to retain.

“You said Maria was alright?”

“Yeah; she may be tiny, but she’s got some fight in her. They’re gonna make sure she’s capable of doing this interrogation before anything, though.”

“I want to be there.”

Gavin glanced over his shoulder at the determined look Nick wore and laughed. “Are you kidding me? You’re not even in your own clothes and the ones you have are soaked…”

“That’s…beside the point.”

A short walk a few parking spaces down and they made it to the car. They got in before continuing their conversation; Gavin started the engine while Nick hovered over the controls, eager to get some hot air blowing against his chilly skin.

“Nick…you’re going back to your room. I will take care of this.” Gavin pulled onto the street and steadily steered them towards the motel. “Besides, with the way she took off like that, chances are, Maria won’t say much.”

The car fell silent for a moment. It was always that way: Gavin had a point and Nick couldn’t find it in himself to argue against it. Instead of putting up a fight, the only thing he wanted to do was take a steaming hot shower and then curl up in the covers. He let his head loll to the side and let out a heavy sigh, steaming up the window.

Gavin glanced at Nick every now and then, unable to fight off the smile that tugged at the corner of his lips. Seeing Nick disheveled and more ordinary than he’d seen within the short amount of time they’d known each other was enough to catch his intrigue.

“Don’t look so disappointed. You were pretty impressive tonight, keeping up with Maria like that.”

Nick met Gavin’s gaze, said nothing and did not fight off a smirk.

“What did she do when she spotted you?” he asked. Outside, a handful of people roamed the streets; those brave enough to venture out in the cold.

“She took a swing at me; came outta nowhere, too. I was lucky enough to dodge it ‘cause it looked like it would’ve hurt.”

Softly—almost inaudibly—Nick chuckled and thought of the moment when Maria collided into him. He gingerly rubbed his ribs and winced at the mounting ache.

“Yeah…I’m sure I’ll feel it tomorrow…”

[Bun]

Christmas Without

He knew it was coming. He’d seen the signs everywhere: people braving the harsh weather, wearing heavy clothing and carrying bags as they tromped through the snow; lights strung about on trees and houses—it was Christmas. Ever since he had been left to fend on his own, Nick dreaded the days when he would look out onto the streets and feel his heart drop into his stomach; that’s not what Christmas was about. It was supposed to be a happy time, spending the holiday with loved ones and not in some drafty office. Yet there he sat behind his desk still wearing his coat because of the lack of heat from the building. Although some officers had been scheduled; at 10:00 PM on Christmas Eve, that part of the department was dead.

Nick let out a heavy sigh and threw down the folder he held; the queasiness he’d been trying to hard to fight off was beginning to rise from the pit of his stomach again. At that rate, it would be nearly impossible to get any work done. He leaned his weight back into the chair and closed his eyes, trying to ward off the waves of nausea, but nothing helped. No matter how badly he did not want to think about the fact that Valerie and James were truly gone, it was the only thought in his mind.

If he couldn’t work, then he was truly at a loss. Nick refused to go back to that motel room where he would end up watching Christmas specials, and eventually wind up in a situation where—though tempting—he could rationalize offing himself. That was not what he wanted despite the growing ache that panged in his heart. All he wanted was for it to go away; a simple wish, really, not asking for too much.

Again, Nick sighed and tossed his pencil down. It was no use. He would have to find somewhere else to go, something else to do just as long as it occupied his mind. He began to gather the folders that sat on his desk and went to put them back into the file cabinet against the back wall when he heard a set of keys jingle in the hall. Earlier, he had locked the door behind him seeing as how no one was supposed to be coming in that night and he panicked, wondering who it could be. When the door opened, Nick could only stand and stare in shock at his partner.

Gavin stared back at him as well, momentarily stunned to find anyone in the office at that hour. But when the thought crossed his mind, it didn’t seem as unlikely that Nick would be there, too.

“Nick. What are you doing here?” He didn’t go to his desk, which Nick figured he would do seeing as how he had come all the way to the office. Instead, Gavin watched his partner return to his chair to finished tidying up.

“I could ask you the same thing…”

Gavin shoved his hands in his pockets and strolled over to the desk where he leaned against the corner, peering over his shoulder at Nick.

“I didn’t have anything else to do, so I thought I’d come in; see if anything needed to be finished.” He looked up at the clock on the wall. “What a coincidence, huh?”

“What about Cole?” Nick asked. Not that he really cared to know why Gavin wasn’t spending time with the man.

A chuckle escaped the blond. “Unlike me, he’s got places to go and family to visit.” Gavin looked over his shoulder again, watching as Nick deliberately avoided eye contact. “Actually, were you planning on staying?”

“No,” Nick replied. He stopped what he was doing to meet Gavin’s gaze; a flicker of scheme glisten behind them. Gavin pushed himself off of the desk and headed for the door.

“Let’s get out of here.”

~

The snow had stopped falling by then, and sat piled on the sidewalks and in the trees. It shined brightly under the soft glow of streetlights, some areas disturbed by shoe prints and some left completely untouched.

A heavy silence had settled in the car—Gavin steered them carefully down the road while Nick gazed outside the window at the white scenery. Gravel crunched loudly under the tires having been scattered around the streets left by snowplows; the only sound that broke the silence. That is, until Gavin spoke up.

“I gather you don’t want to go back to your motel…”

“Not really.”

“Then is there any place you had in mind?”

For a moment, Nick thought about the opportunity he had been given. He knew where he wanted to go, but he wasn’t sure if asking Gavin to take him there would be crossing the line. Some part of him was hesitant, but not enough to convince him not to take the chance.

“Yeah, it’s just south of Federal Hill…”

~

Nick was the first to step out of the car, not bothering to wait for Gavin. He hiked a short distance up the hill, eyes darting around in the darkness in search of the right plot. His partner met him shortly, minding the hedge stones scattered about the area covered in a light dusting of snow. Nick came to a stop in front of a stone that shared two names, two separate dates of birth and a few final departing words.

Nick’s breath billowed in front of him as he tried to find a steady rhythm. The longer they stood there staring at the graves, the harder it was to control the stinging sensation that burned his eyes. He wanted to say something but he wasn’t sure what would come out if he opened his mouth. Soon, it began to feel like a bad idea.

“I still can’t believe they’re gone,” Nick said, though his voice wasn’t much louder than the wind that breezed passed them. “Right now, we’d be…at the tree…opening one present each. Val would pick them for us…James’d probably be video taping…” His voice cracked as he laughed and sucked in a deep breath of air. He wanted to cry, though.

It was hard to listen to those words, but Gavin remained silent out of respect for his partner; regardless of whether he was finding it hard to refrain from pulling Nick into an embrace. The next words out of his mouth are what convinced Gavin otherwise.

“I miss them…”

That was enough; he couldn’t listen to it anymore and would not if he had anything to say about it. Without warning, Gavin snaked a hand around the back of Nick’s neck and pulled his partner against him. Nick buried his face in Gavin’s shoulder, trying to fight back the tears, but they spilled over despite his efforts. Being in someone’s arms felt good; and not just anyone’s, but Gavin’s.

He kept his sobbing to a dull roar, sniffling every now and then. Gavin could feel the tears against his skin, soaking into his shirt collar. It didn’t matter so long as Nick could freely express what he felt; whether that feeling was good or bad—it was something.

--

Nick sat stiffly in the booth, gripping his fist with the other hand, waiting for Gavin’s return. Once he’d regained a bit of composure, they left the cemetery and stopped at a diner on the way back; one of the few places that was 24/7.

He let out the breath he was holding when Gavin returned, sliding into the booth carefully so as not to spill their drinks.

“One hot chocolate with cream,” Gavin said, setting the cup down in front of his partner, “and one without.”

Carefully, Nick peeled the top of his cup off and blew gently at the rising steam. After having just poured his heart out — to a man, he’d known for such a short time — Nick could hardly believe he wasn’t feeling utterly embarrassed. He didn’t want to run away and wasn’t wishing for things to be different; in fact, it was the complete opposite. Nick was enjoying his partner’s company, not as a mere colleague, but as a friend, a friend who could help keep his mind away from the thoughts that would surely be his downfall.

It had been rough, however, to expose himself in such a way. But Nick was beyond tired of having the show fixated on him. He’d always been curious about Gavin, and found the man to be fascinating; yet he hardly knew anything about his partner, and Gavin already knew so much about him.

“So, uh…you don’t have any family to visit?” Nick wondered, licking away the foaming white cream from his lips.

“Not really,” Gavin replied. He threw one arm around the back of the booth to get comfortable. He could tell it was going to be a long night. “Well, there is someone.”

Nick stared at him with a curious twinkle in his eye.

“My aunt. She lives in Dorsey, though, and we were never that close anyway. She’ll call once in a blue moon to make sure I’m still alive, but besides that…”

“No brothers or sisters?”

“I’m an only child... Well, I do have a have sister, but we don't see each other much. I don’t really know my parents, either. My dad was gone before I was even born and my mom left me to her mother’s younger sister. She’s the one who raised me until I decided to high tail it out of there and come to Baltimore at 16 years old.”

“That’s pretty young…”

Gavin chuckled. “Pretty stupid while we’re at it. Amazingly, I managed to survive until I decided to join the force.”

Nodding, Nick took another sip of his drink. The whipped cream had been eaten by then and the hot chocolate was getting cold, but he was much more interested in having a real conversation with his partner than to be bothered by the little things.

“Sounds interesting—nothing like me.”

Gavin sat forward, leaning against his elbows. “You didn’t grow up here, did you?”

“I was born in Washington; raised in Seattle until I was 17.”

“Why the big move?”

“My parents passed away.”

“I’m sorry…”

Nick shook his head, dismissing the apology. He missed them, but it was something he’d come to terms with.

“Valerie had already moved to Baltimore to finish school when I was 15. Two years later, she got the call; they died in a car accident and left me to fend for myself. I ended up moving in with Val while she worked and lived with her for another two years after that.”

He looked up to find Gavin’s gaze staring off somewhere passed his shoulder. Gavin murmured his reply, mindlessly nodding when suddenly he jerked out of a stupor and glanced at his wristwatch.

“Hey, look,” the blond said with a smile. He turned his wrist so Nick could see. “Merry Christmas!”

Indeed it was: two minutes passed midnight to be exact.

“Merry Christmas,” Nick replied.

[Bun]

Chapter Eight


Two weeks had flown by since that night on Christmas at the diner, something Nick would think about when he had a moment to himself. After finishing their cups of hot chocolate at the diner, Gavin insisted they swing by a convenient store for some eggnog, which Nick never argued against, and ended up at his motel with the heat cranked up to the highest setting. Gavin had found the television channel that aired feed of a fireplace and retrieved a set of cards from his car; he had everything in there, it seemed. But none of that mattered, so long as Nick didn’t have to be alone.

Now the days were longer and colder, and the department served as a makeshift dwelling with the influx of tips in regards to the case. They could only celebrate the New Year with a glass of Martinelli that Anna had brought in, and then it was back to work.

Even Jim was stuck in the office finishing some last minute paperwork, which he, too, loathed as Gavin made apparent as well.

Looking up from his desk, Jim threw his hands down loudly against the paper, startling the two men sitting across from him. He set his pen down neatly atop the mess that lay scattered across his desktop and smiled.

“We’ve all got the second shift, right? How about, after work, we meet up for dinner and drinks somewhere?”

The proposition seemed innocent enough, but Gavin was enjoying the look of horror in Nick’s eyes.

“My wife is outta town with the kids visiting her mother, which leaves me with some time on my hands after work. I’m sure you guys wouldn’t mind a bit of a break, either,” Jim explained. He seemed to be very keen on the idea, unwilling to accept any answer other than yes.

Gavin flashed Jim a toothy smile and leaned back into his chair. He folded his arms across his chest, turning to face Nick who hadn’t said a word.

“Well, I don’t know about my partner here, but I’m free for the night. You can count me in.”

All eyes were on Nick now, the only one left to accept. He swallowed the thick lump in his throat and flinched as it passed painful down his chest and into his stomach. Aside from with Gavin—though mostly on duty—he hadn’t been out for a night of socialization for almost a year. The thought made his stomach turn and Nick wasn’t sure if he could do it, but he needed to answer.

“Sure,” was all he said. And it was good enough for Jim.

--

The restaurant Jim suggested was not far from the department, but the ride over felt like an eternity. Nick decided to share a taxi with Gavin at the likelihood that they would be drinking and insisted he pay his share of the fare. Out of the backseat and around the car, Nick hopped over the snow still piled against the curb, following his partner up the set of steps that led to the front entrance.

They were greeted by the hostess who pointed Gavin in the direction of the rest of their party. Jim sat at a table in the middle of the crowded, noisy room decorated in dark wood and dim lights. Across the table from Jim, next to his partner is where Nick sat and they were immediately approached by the waitress. After grabbing their drink order, Jim kicked off the conversation, having to lean over the table and raise his voice over the roar of other patrons.

“I was beginning to think you guys wouldn’t make it!”

“Sorry about that,” Gavin replied. He shrugged his overcoat off and slung it on the back of his chair. “Things got pretty hectic back at the department, but we made it.”

For now, Jim picked up his glass of water; already dripping wet with perspiration. He sipped on it and crushed a piece of ice between his teeth. “So this case is really ridin’ you guys, huh? This is the first week since last year that we’ve all been in the office together.”

“Yeah, well, it’s kind of a blessing, you know? As busy as we are, it means we can move forward.”

“Good point!”

“What about Russell? You said you were going to invite him.”

“Oh, Russ couldn’t make it – some thing with his family. He says he’ll be back at the department as soon as he can, which kind of sucks for me since that means my partner is gone. I’m swamped enough as it is. I mean, as much as I miss Diane and the kids, it gives me a bit of time to catch up while they’re gone.”

Gavin wagged a finger at Jim, leaning out of the way when the waitress came back with their drinks. He watched her mindlessly set the glasses in front of them and continued. “You’ve always been pretty adamant about making time to spend with your family.”

“Is that a bad thing?” Jim laughed, diving right into his drink.

“It’s refreshing.”

Meanwhile, Nick had placed his order, handing the menu back to the waitress who went around to Gavin and then Jim. She left for the second time when the conversation suddenly shifted in Nick’s direction.

“Speaking of significant others, I see you’re wearing a ring,” Jim pointed out. “Are you engaged?”

The question caught Nick by surprise. Suddenly, he felt embarrassed by the fact that he was still wearing his ring and brought his hand under the table, twisting it off.

“I was,” Nick answered. He knew Gavin had seen him take the ring off, but the issue would remain separate for now. “Didn’t work out, though,” he clarified. “It’s complicated.”

“Isn’t it always, though?” Nick nearly let out a sigh of relief when Jim brought his drink up for a toast. That meant he wouldn’t have to bother explaining the situation, at least for now. “Let’s forget about that. Tonight—we drink!”

--

Their first course—appetizers—arrived shortly, hot from the oven and ending up being almost too much. Nick quietly snacked on most of the mozzarella sticks while Jim and Gavin spoke and laughed loudly over the roar of parties next to them, dishes clanking in the background and the sounds coming from the kitchen. When their entrees came, the conversation died shortly only to pick up again when they managed to finish a good portion of their meals. The waitress returned a few times to check on them and took their plates. “No rush,” she said with a smile and left the bill. Jim seemed to have no intention of leaving any time soon, in any case.

“What’s this I hear about you falling into the harbor, Nick? I bet that was fun.”

“Hardly,” the brunette rolled his eyes and leaned against his elbows on the table.

Jim snorted at his answer. “I know what you mean. I’ve had the pleasure of testing out the water myself.”

“Testing?” Gavin interrupted. “You jumped right in!”

“You would have done it, too!” Jim griped.

“Well, sure,” the blond admitted, “but I wasn’t there.”

Having no idea what they were referring to, Nick ventured to inquire further. “What happened?” It was Gavin who fielded that question.

“This happened about a year ago,” he began, glancing at Jim across the table. “We got a call at around 10:30 in the morning saying that a woman had driven her car off of the road and straight into the harbor. Not only that, but Jim here had dove in right after her. When I got on the scene, they were loading him into the back of the ambulance because he was under water for a good five or six minutes.”

“Almost drown,” Jim added.

“Supposedly, he rolled up his sleeves and voluntarily marched right in. I mean, this is the dead of winter.”

“I took my coat off!”

That made Gavin laugh. “Weren’t you off duty that day?”

“Yeah. It was the damnedest thing. I happened to be passing by at the same time and saw all of it.”

“That woman was lucky he’s out of his mind.”

“Hey, any good cop would’ve done the same thing,” Jim playfully scoffed, defending his decision at the time. “I broke my arm, too, yanno.”

“Oh, and your poor wife,” Gavin sighed. He slapped a hand across his face and shook his head. “She nearly lost it when I called to tell her that her husband was in the hospital suffering from hypothermia and a broken arm.”

Jim just waved it off, finishing the rest of his drink. It was his fourth one that night and the glasses were quite large. It was obvious, by the way he moved and garbled his words, that he was starting to feel the effects of the alcohol, just like Gavin and Nick.

“She’s always been a worrier.”

“I don’t blame her.”

Out of the seat of his pants, a distinct jingle sounded and Jim fished his cell phone out of his pocket. He squinted to get a better look at the number, half-standing from his seat to excuse himself.

“Sorry guys, I gotta take this.”

Beside Gavin, Nick excused himself as well, taking his overcoat with him. He’d made it through most of the night without a hitch, but some fresh air would help to cool the feverishness he felt flushing in his cheeks.

When he opened the door to the patio, he was greeted by an almost painfully brisk gust of wind that settled shortly. Nick walked a few short steps and leaned against the waist-high brick wall that ran along the length of the patio. Over the side, he could see the lights from the boats on the harbor bobbing up and down in the water. He wanted so badly for the tension to melt away, and felt a familiar yet long forgotten itch that reared its ugly head at times like these. In his breast pocket, Nick found a pack of cigarettes, half empty, from God only knew how long ago. He didn’t hesitate to pull them out and found a book of matches conveniently placed in an ashtray on one of the tables near him. The white stick hung loosely between his lips, which he lit and inhaled, immediately feeling that tranquility when the nicotine hit. Nick closed his eyes and slowly exhaled; the smoke dissipated in the cold air in front of him.

Inhaling again, it burned his throat as it passed into his lungs, but he didn’t mind the feeling. He hadn’t smoked for a few months; another nasty habit he’d picked up to help cope with the stress and one Kelly made sure he knew she hated with a passion. But she wasn’t there now.

From behind, the door opened and—for a moment—the loud atmosphere of the restaurant sounded until it drifted away again, muffled by the plate-glass window. Nick turned to see who it was, surprised to find Gavin approaching him. He almost snuffed the cigarette out on the brick wall, but realized it would be pointless to waste a perfectly good cigarette now that Gavin had already seen.

“I didn’t know you smoked,” the blond said.

“I don’t,” Nick replied, taking another drag. “Is Jim back?”

“No, he’s still on the phone. It’s his wife; he’ll be another few minutes.” Gavin paused and joined his partner by his side, looking out over the vast panorama of the harbor. “It’s getting late, anyway. I think he’s gonna take off soon.”

“Guess we should, too.”

Now, Nick was blowing the smoke away from them, unsure if it would bother Gavin or not.

It was getting to the time where they would need to leave as well. The next morning called for them to be on full alert. After a lengthy wait, they were to serve the arrest warrant at Sydney’s place, but the night was not over yet.

“You were pretty quiet tonight,” Gavin pointed out. “Did you have any fun?”

Of course he would ask that, but luckily for Nick, he had a genuine answer this time.

“I suppose watching you two exchange a good laugh was mildly entertaining,” Nick said. He eyed his partner with a sly grin and blew out a puff of smoke, flicking the ashes into a glass tray.


Gavin nodded once, satisfied with the answer. “I’m glad.” What he did next, however, took Nick by complete surprise. Boldly, and with some manner of mischievousness, Gavin plucked the cigarette that hung from Nick’s mouth to take one last drag. He leaned in closer to snuff it out in the tray, and turned on his heels to head back inside.

“Meet you inside,” he said, only to disappear through the doorway into the liveliness of the restaurant.

When the door shut, that is when Nick allowed himself to react. Nick could’ve sworn there was something more behind what Gavin had just done. There had to be, right? There was no way any man would do such a thing and smirk the way he did if there wasn’t. Nick even thought that maybe it was just his imagination running away with him, but using that as an excuse seemed entirely ridiculous.

As soon as the moment of confusion and hesitation passed, even through the buzz he felt swimming in his head, Nick thought about it clearly. It was the first time in a long while that he had experienced such a feeling; the sudden drop in the pit of his stomach and the way his heart raced in his chest. The only other time had been with James… For whatever reason his body reacted that way, it would have to wait. Jim had to be off the phone by then and the bill had already been paid.

They were expecting him.

[Bun]

Chapter Nine


Part I


“Police!”

The door burst open, hitting the wall behind it with a deafening crack and the officers poured in one after the other. A taller man, outfitted in a vest and police jacket, moved in front of Lieutenant Reese followed by two more officers, Nick and Gavin. Each man split off as the apartment led to different rooms; the kitchen to the right down the front entry and the living room located straight ahead.

Without having any knowledge of the layout of the apartment, it was a big risk for them to waltz right in; the ever-present silence rang loudly in the shadows cast from the sun shining in the window barely rising over the horizon.

At the end of the line, Gavin slipped into the kitchen from around the corner of the entryway. He was relieved to find himself at a dead end. The wall in front of him would not allow anyone to hide, which satisfied his suspicions and prompted him to turn back and head deeper into the apartment.

“This is the Baltimore police department!” Reese called out, loud enough that any loitering individuals hear. “If there is anyone present, make yourself known! Come out slowly with your hands in the air!”

There was no answer—nothing at all.

That was to be expected, however. The lack of anything other than furniture didn’t seem to surprise anyone as they combed through the place, checking every corner they could find. It was a well-known fact by then: supposedly, Sydney had high-tailed it out of town just as the others had and so far, the information proved to be true.

Lieutenant Reese eyed Gavin from across the living room where he stood next to a desk. Atop it lay a few loose papers, a lamp and everything else one could presume would be found on a desk. At that moment, Gavin—though keeping his weapon raised as he approached another door—felt like they had hit another barrier. He knew he wouldn’t find anything in the next room and almost certainly anticipated the rest of the place to be empty as well.

Down the hallway that led to the bedroom, an officer called out his presence. For a moment, all anyone could hear was the sound of feet shuffling until two loud pops sounded, one after the other, echoing vociferously down the hall. A third shot, though delayed, prompted everyone in the living room to swarm to where it had come from. Someone shouted for the Lieutenant and a piercing scream could be heard; knowing exactly who it was made Gavin rush down the hall even faster.

As soon as his eyes fell upon Nick, who lay on the floor on his back, howling in pain, Gavin felt his stomach drop. Another officer sat with his back against the wall, holding his torso, but the blond couldn’t have cared less about what had happened to him; not while his partner was bleeding on the pristine white carpets.

Gavin fell to his knees beside Nick and hovered over the man, checking for any other wounds less apparent than the one that had hit his leg. When Nick managed to catch his breath, he met his partner’s worried gaze and swallowed a thick lump down his throat. Nick wanted so desperately to say something, to let Gavin know that he was alert, but the pain was too much to even think through; white hot and burning fiercely in his thigh. Nick jerked his head to the side and squeezed his eyes shut, feeling a warm palm against the side of his face. Beads of sweat dripped down his forehead yet a violent chill pulsed through his entire body.

“Hey,” Gavin huffed, trying to keep some composure. He leaned in closer to Nick’s face, close enough that he could feel hot breath panting against his skin. “Can you hear me? Stay with me, alright?”

It was hard for Nick to do much of anything other than grind his teeth together, as if that would help fight off the pain. An officer hovered over Gavin’s shoulder, watching the scene with worried eyes. He felt the need to explain what had happened. In the bedroom just a few feet away, Lieutenant Reese stood on the phone with emergency services requesting a medic; another man—the shooter—was being tackled onto the floor.

“He shot at Pratchett first,” the officer began, voice hesitant and unsteady. “The bullet ricocheted off his vest, just at the rib cage and he shot again. The second bullet hit the wall, but the third…”

That was more than Gavin needed to hear.

Now the blood was coming at a steady flow and would need more than a hand to keep it from spilling out. “Get me a towel!” Gavin shouted to the officer, pointing at the bathroom to emphasize the weight of his distress. Within seconds, the officer returned, handing the towel to Gavin who pressed heavily down on the wound.

Nick hissed at the pressure and let his head fall back against the carpet. Everything was getting hazy; his vision blurred and his head swam making it difficult to keep his focus. He was fading fast and Gavin could tell just by the way the color drained out of his face.

Under Nick’s leg, the dark puddle of blood seemed to stop growing, which wasn’t much of a relief considering how much Nick had already lost. The blond clucked his tongue in disapproval, wondering when the paramedics would arrive.

Ten minutes too long and the sound of sirens could be hear from the distance. As each second passed, the sirens became louder, eventually stopping outside of the building. It felt even longer knowing they were on their way upstairs, but the EMT's arrived with a stretcher and their toolboxes only a few minutes later. They pushed Gavin out of the way in order to do their work properly; two men tended to Nick while the other treated the second wounded officer. It wasn’t long before they had Nick on the gurney and were rushing out of the apartment, back to the truck. The entire time, the only thing Gavin could do was watch as they took his partner away. By then it was pertinent they get to the hospital and fast. If they had any chance of minimizing the damage, it all depended on getting Nick out immediately.

--

Gavin did not stay behind while the rest of his colleagues secured the scene. He insisted—no, demanded they allow him to accompany his partner to the nearest hospital. He knew they wouldn't let him ride along in the ambulance with them, so followed in his car as closely as he could and rushed in through the hospital doors right along side the gurney. The trip down the hall to the emergency room didn’t last very long, however. A man dressed in light blue scrubs pushed him out of the room where he would be forced to wait outside in the hall—how long of a wait would remain a mystery. Every second that passed felt like forever; the splotches on the tiled floor were not enough to count during the time Gavin spent waiting outside that room.

He thought he’d go mad and end up bursting inside the room when the doors finally flew open; and this time a doctor came out. The familiar sounds came rushing out, one in particular which frightened Gavin the most. Only ten minutes had passed since they arrived and already Nick was flat lining. Gavin jumped from his seat, blocking the man’s path. All he wanted was an update on the situation.

“Wait a minute, what’s going on? Where are you going? Why--?” So many words spilled out of his mouth, it hardly made any sense, but the doctor stopped him before he could make any less sense.

“Who are you?”

“I’m his partner; I was there when he was shot."

The doctor sighed, removing his mask. He moved them out of the flow of traffic through the hall, obviously in a hurry, but explained as much as he could. "They're trying to stabilize him."

"He's no heartbeat...!" Gavin pointed out, trying to get a better glance over the doctor's shoulder.

"He's lost a lot of blood; it may take a little time to get enough back into his body so his heart can do the job for him."

"Is he going to be alright?"

“I don't know at this point. From what I can tell by just looking at him, the bullet hit is femoral artery.” He slapped the inside of his thigh illustrate. “Now, we’re not entirely sure just how deep the wound goes, but ones the films are taken we can get a better idea of what we’re looking at…”

“How much blood did he lose?”

“It’s slowed at this point, but I’d say around 2 liters.”

“Jesus…”

“He seems to be reacting to the transfusion well enough, but we're worried about his vitals...as you can tell. The only issue right now is getting and keeping him stable. Until then, I can’t say much of anything.”

Gavin winced at the ambiguousness of the doctor’s answer, but it made sense. No matter how badly he didn’t want to believe Nick’s future was on the line, he knew he couldn’t very well ignore the fact either.

“By the way,” the doctor said, adding one more thing before leaving. “We got in touch with his emergency contact; she said she’ll be here as soon as possible.” Soon, the man had slipped away, disappearing into the sea of people that swarmed the hall. Gavin frowned, trying to gather his jumbled thoughts and soak in the news at the same time. Then it hit him. He was shocked at first, remembering the night before at dinner with Jim. Nick had been wearing a ring which he had slipped off under the table. It was his fiancée. They had contacted his fiancée and she was on her way at that very moment.

~

This time, in another waiting area upstairs, which was less crowded than the one downstairs, Gavin sat calmly, slumped in the hard plastic chair. With his arms crossed over his chest and one leg thrown over the other, Gavin stared somewhere beyond the set of seats in front of him, waiting for the moment when that woman would arrive.

He tried to imagine what she looked like, if she had blonde hair or if it was dark like Nick’s. Maybe she was tall and slender or shorter and petite. Those thoughts eventually led Gavin to wonder why the engagement hadn’t pulled through. Was it Nick’s fault? Was it his fiancées? Why was he even thinking about such trivial things? His train of thought was soon interrupted by the distinct sound of heels clicking against the tile floor. Gavin uncrossed his legs and pushed himself to stand upright, moving around the chairs to get a better look down the hall. His eyes fell upon the woman coming straight for him; undoubtedly, exactly who he had been waiting for.

She was of average height—an few inches shorter than him—with long, sandy blonde hair that flowed just passed her chest and was quite beautiful, in fact. The woman wore a black turtle neck sweater under a leather jacket with dark wash jeans and a pair of leather, high-heeled boots that went up to her knees. Their eyes met when she realized Gavin was staring at her and she approached him, lifting her sunglasses to perch on top of her head.

“I’m sorry,” she began, obviously unsure of where she was. “Is this…?”

“You’re looking for Nick?”

The woman let out a sigh of relief and brought a hand to her chest. On her finger, she wore an antique ring that sparkled in the light.

“Yes. They told me that he was in the operating room, but that’s it.” She shifted her purse from one shoulder to the other, glancing at Gavin with a curious inquisition and offered her hand. “I’m sorry. I’m Kelly Porter, Nick’s fiancée.”

Reluctantly, as if touching her would burn his skin, Gavin accepted the gesture and shook if only for a brief moment.

“I’m Gavin, Nick’s partner,” he replied.

[Bun]

Part II



They had stabilized him—finally—after a few agonizing hours of uncertainty; Nick lay in ICU with tubes and wires running in and out of his body still unconscious from the trauma, though the doctors expected him to survive. The entire time, from the moment Kelly had arrived to coming upon the fifth hour, Gavin sat in the waiting area listening to that awful woman yak on the phone with family and friends. She’d called them to let them know what was going on and sounded much less concerned than any normal human being should in a situation such as that one. It soon struck Gavin, by the fourth call, that she had to have been the source of all their problems—there was no other way around it. He wished he had the power of authority to tell her to leave, but, alas, he did not. After all, she was still Nick’s fiancée.

It took Kelly around an hour to make all of her calls, which is when an older man—different from the one before—dressed in a white lab coat exited Nick’s room, prompting both Gavin and Kelly to stand up from the bench they had been sitting on. Dr. Pearson, the name on his tag, shoved his hands in his pockets and let out a heavy sigh.

“Well?” Kelly asked, “How is he?”

“He’s stable, for now. I expect him to remain so as we’ve stopped the bleeding. Nick also responded well enough to the transfusions, but he is exhibiting signs of a reaction.”

This made Kelly frown. “Reaction? What kind of reaction?”

“We refer to it as febrile non-hemolytic transfusion reaction; it’s common and usually consists of an elevated temperature, headache—things of that sort. He’s also been shivering slightly, which may indicate he’s experiencing chills, but it’s hard to be certain.”

“Is there anything you can do for that?”

“Unfortunately, there is not. The fever will go away on its own, but it’s definitely not my major concern at this point.”

It seemed simple enough, to Gavin at least. Kelly, on the other hand, felt the need to make a bigger deal out of the situation than necessary.

“Alright,” Kelly sighed, shrugging her big black purse over her shoulder. “Is he awake?”

“Not right now.”

“Can I see him anyway?”

“Of course,” the doctor nodded and stepped aside. He let Kelly brush passed him, but didn’t follow the woman into the room. Instead, he lingered in the hall with Gavin who hesitated to join her as well.

“Not going inside?”

“Oh…well, not yet. It’s probably best to give them some time together,” Gavin explained.

“Ah...” Through the open doorway, they could see Kelly step up to the side of the bed. She touched Nick’s uninjured leg, squeezing it gently and then moved out of sight. “Then I will be back to check on him later,” Dr. Pearson said, flashing the blond a gracious smile. Now that he was alone again, Gavin wasn’t sure what he should do knowing that Nick would be fine. He’d give them as much time as needed, but he wasn’t going to leave the hospital until he got a chance to speak with Nick himself.

Just as Gavin went to sit back down on the bench, a familiar figure appeared out of the corner of his eyes. He spotted the Lieutenant rushing toward him and met the man half way.

“I’m sorry I couldn’t get here sooner,” Reese huffed, “How is he?” He hadn’t heard anything since they’d left the apartment.

“He’s stable, still unconscious,” Gavin replied with a sigh. “Lost a lot of blood and they had to resuscitate him once or twice, but he’s alive…”

The despondent tone in Gavin’s voice was painfully obvious—he’d almost lost his partner that day.

“I’m so sorry, Gavin. You’ve been through quite a bit yourself. How are you doing?”

“Nah, I’m fine. I’m just glad Nick is still with us.”

“I think we all are.”

Suddenly, the other officer came to mind. “What about Pritchett?”

“Well, he’s no where near as bad as Nick, but he will have a nasty bruise. Everyone was asking for an update, though. They’re more worried about Nick, so they’ll be happy to hear some good news,” Reese replied. He shot a glance into the room, noticing another person in there that wasn’t dressed in scrubs or a white lab coat. It caught him as somewhat odd knowing he didn’t have any family left. “Who is that?”

Gavin’s tone sounded less than enthused. ”His fiancée.”

“Fiancée?”

“Yeah, I…guess things weren’t really working out. She still lives up North, but she’s his emergency contact.”

“I see…” Gavin had heard enough about that woman, however, and did not hesitate to change the subject.

“What about the guy in the apartment?” he wondered, crossing his arms. “Did you find out who he is?”

A smile tugged at the corner of the lieutenant’s lips, though why he was wearing such an expression was not so clear. “The other set of DNA we found on that woman’s body.”

Immediately, Gavin's eyes lit up as he turned to face the lieutenant. “You mean…?”

Reese nodded, this time for emphasis. “Cal Rogers.”

Gavin couldn’t believe what he was hearing. After barging into the apartment expecting absolutely nothing, now they had their first suspect.

“But,” Reese interrupted his thoughts,” this is no place to be discussing such a subject.” He straightened out his jacket, intent on departing with good news. There wasn’t much of a reason for him to stick around since Nick wasn’t even awake, but he thought it would be better to see for himself. “I’m glad to hear Nick is alright. You should take it easy, too.”

“What about Cal?”

“Don’t worry about Cal; I will handle him. I want you to take some time off to gather your senses.”

“For how long?”

“As long as you feel is necessary so long as it’s within reason. We won’t put a number of it just yet.” Just then, Reese turned to make his way back down the hall but stopped to add one more thing. “You will call me if Nick’s condition changes, right?”

Gavin nodded, “Yeah…” and watched as Reese disappeared around the corner from where he came.

--

His stomach grumbled, but the burning in his eyes was enough to convince Gavin he needed something strong to wake himself up instead of food. He wasn’t sure how much longer Kelly was going to stay in the room with Nick and decided to consult the nearest employee as to where he could get some coffee. Before he could even get to the nurses station, two women dressed in scrubs shuffled down the hall passed him and went straight into Nick’s room. Nothing had been wrong before he left the bench in the hall, but curiosity convinced him to turn back and investigate. Inside the room, Kelly stood back while the nurses hovered over Nick’s bed.

“He was asleep just a minute ago,” Kelly explained. Nick stirred slightly under the thin blanket, but the two women weren’t doing much other than monitoring his vitals.

“It’s fine,” one of the nurses said. “He’s probably just disoriented.” Gavin watched from the foot of the bed as the nurse leaned in closer and began to speak to him. “Mr. McCarthy, can you hear me? You’re in the hospital. I need you to stop moving or you’ll pull out your IV.”

Though the struggling continued, Nick seemed to have got the message. Kelly moved back to where she had been standing, back to his side and flashed him a smile. The moment Nick’s vision cleared and their gazes met, he frowned at her presence, softly asking where Gavin was instead. Kelly blinked in surprised and paused for a moment, then glanced up at the blond standing at the foot of the bed.

“How are you feeling?”

Before answering, Nick swallowed a thick lump down his throat. Still disoriented by the trauma he’d sustained; it took him a moment to focus.

“I was shot,” he croaked; his voice slightly hoarse. “How do you think I feel?”

As unexpected as the answer was, Kelly ignored his discourtesy and chuckled softly.

“You’ve been through a lot,” she said, taking his hand in hers. With what strength he could muster, Nick snatched it away and continued to question her presence.

“What are you doing here?”

“What do you mean ‘what am I doing here?’ They called me and told me what happened. I was worried.”

Things were getting more awkward by the second and all Gavin wanted to do was leave the room. He couldn’t have been any more appreciative when Nick asked for a bit of privacy with Kelly, to which his partner and the two nurses happily bestowed. Once the room was empty, Nick continued their conversation.

“You don’t have to be here…”

Kelly laughed in response, genuinely surprised by what Nick was saying. “You must’ve hit your head, too. You’re not thinking clearly.”

“I’m thinking just fine!” Nick snapped, raising his voice enough to make her freeze in her tracks. “And right now I’m thinking it was a huge mistake calling you here.”

“But Nick, I love you, I—”

“It’s over, Kelly. I’ve moved on. You and me…that’s in the past; I have other things to worry about now.”

Kelly shook her head anyway, determined to prove that he was merely confused after what had happened. “I’m not leaving you.”

“God damnit, Kelly, LEAVE!”

It wasn’t common for Nick to shout, but Kelly couldn’t remember the last time he had ever shouted at her, if ever. She stood there staring at him wide eyed and in complete and utter shock. Kelly was offended, to say the least, and the fact that her would be husband was lying in a hospital bed having narrowly missed death had left no selfless impression on her. Instead, she pursed her lips and nodded, twisting his mother’s ring off of her finger before obliging to his wishes.

“Okay,” was all she said; then slapped the ring down on the edge of the mattress just within his reach. “If that’s how you want it.”

From the big chair in the corner, Kelly grabbed her purse and stormed out of the room, purposefully making a scene. Despite the slamming of the door or the loud clack of her heels against the tile floor, Nick could hardly focus on anything other than the swimming feeling in his head; the medication still flowed heavily through his body.

After a few moments, a set of knocks sounded before the door cracked open. Nick lifted his head from the pillow to see who it was and spotted Gavin peeking through, wearing a sheepish smile as he stepped in. Nick couldn’t have felt any more embarrassed to face his partner after what had just happened, but he had little choice of retreat other than to hide under the covers.

“Sorry,” Nick muttered, glancing away so he wouldn’t have to look his partner in the eyes.

“There’s no need to apologize,” Gavin replied and stopped to stand at the edge of the bed.

“Yeah, but I didn’t mean for her to come here.”

“It’s okay. Don’t sweat it…”

He couldn’t care anymore, about Kelly or how uncomfortable the pain was even with the morphine that coursed through his veins. Caring required effort and Nick had little of that left.

“Although I have to say, she is a bit scary,” Gavin joked. It made Nick snicker softly; a welcoming sound to Gavin’s ears. The slight smile that pulled at his lips disappeared and that bad feeling he felt in the pit of his stomach quickly returned. It hung heavily in the atmosphere, making his nostrils flare as he fought back the tears that stung his eyes.

“Hey…” Nick murmured, almost at a whisper. He tried his best not to look Gavin straight in the eye, which wasn’t very hard now that the medication the nurses gave him was beginning to set in. He’d be asleep again soon, but before that, Nick wanted to know what more thing.

Gavin hummed softly, “Hmm?”

“…You’re gonna stay, right?” Nick asked. He hadn’t seen the look on Gavin’s face; just the way his partner took his hand in his was enough of an answer. Nick liked it better that way, the feel of Gavin’s hand gently squeezing his. He even thought he felt someone brush his bangs out of his eyes, but he was much too far away to know for sure.

“Of course,” Gavin replied.



*End Chapter 9*

[Bun]

Chapter Ten



It was sometime late at night or early morning when Nick woke up; the room was almost pitch-black save for a bit of light shining in from the hall. Through the haze of his awakening, Nick peeled his eyes open slowly and his first urge was to kick the covers off, but he quickly remembered the injury he had sustained. Just lying there sent shock waves of pain through his leg, which spread into his entire body. And for a brief moment, all he could do was ride them out until they passed.

Nick let his head loll back into the pillow as he relaxed his tense muscles. A noise, soft—almost inaudible—sounded next to him. Through the darkness, Nick could make out the familiar silhouette to be none other than his partner sleeping soundly in the chair beside the window. Sometime through the night, Gavin must have had fallen asleep and had been covered with a thin blanket that looked to be provided by the hospital. Just the sight of Gavin’s sleeping face was enough to make Nick smile. He looked so peaceful, so calm and perhaps even cute in a way; though Nick would never admit that to his face. The thought even made Nick blush. With as much stress and physical trauma as he had been through in the last day, Nick could only imagine what Gavin must have felt, almost losing his partner. No, Nick was more than that. The way Gavin acted around Jim, Russell, the lieutenant and even the cute, blonde secretary was completely different. He had to be more than just a partner.

Nick’s thoughts were quickly interrupted by a rush of heat and throbbing pain. Without even thinking, Nick slapped around the bed in search of the remote that controlled the dosage of pain medication. He clicked the plus sign, giving himself just enough to take the edge off. In a few moments, effects became quite apparent. His eyes grew heavy and he could no longer keep his head from slumping side to side. Nick teetered on the edge of consciousness long enough to steal one more glance of his sleeping partner. And with that, he let the medication do its job.

--

When the room was no longer dark, but bathed in sunlight, Nick awoke to find that the chair next to the window was empty and found a nurse changing his IV bag instead. She smiled at him and asked him how he was doing, which he replied with something along the lines of ‘I’ve been better’. The woman smiled again and nodded, then pulled back the blanket to expose his leg.

“I don’t think we need to change the gauze just yet, but we’ll have to sometime later in the day,” she told him. The nurse finished what she was doing and, just before departing, Gavin reappeared from the hall.

“Hey, you’re awake,” he said with a smile.

Right away, Nick noticed that Gavin was still wearing the clothes he had on the day of the incident; not only that, but his hair was tousled and his eyes seemed a little darker than usual. Seeing Gavin in such disarray made Nick feel guilty almost, primarily because he was the only reason Gavin was even there in the first place. He wouldn’t have stayed if it was Jim or Russ…would he?

“Uh, Gavin,” Nick began, having to clear his throat as his words cracked slightly.

“What’s up?”

Just as Nick opened his mouth to continue speaking, a set of knocks sounded at the door and both men glanced to find Jim cautiously moving in from the hall.

Jim joined Gavin next to the bed and greeted Nick with a smile. “Hey. I’m not interrupting anything, am I?”

“‘Course not,” Gavin assured him.

“I’m really sorry I couldn’t drop by sooner. I didn’t even find out about what happened until a few hours after. The lieutenant told us you’d pulled through, though.” Jim paused. “You are doing okay…right?”

“Yeah,” Nick said, smiling softly. He noticed the small bouquet of flowers in Jim’s hands, which Jim proceeded to explain.

“Oh, right! These are from my wife’s garden. I’m not good with picking out flowers, so she’s the one who put them together.” Jim shrugged and handed them to Gavin who walked around the edge of the bed to lay them carefully on the window ceil. “Did the doc tell you what kind of damage you’re looking at?”

“Well, I was hardly conscious when he told me the details, but the bullet went through the muscle and nicked a major artery.”

“That doesn’t sound good…you lost a lot of blood?”

“A little over 2 liters.”

“Jeeze.”

“I don’t remember much of it, though. I guess I passed out around the first liter,” Nick joked, trying to make the best out of such a miserable situation.

The frown on Jim’s face didn’t too much to ease the tension, but he had to find out eventually.

“I’m just glad you’re alright. Everyone sends their best wishes.” Jim sighed and hesitated for a moment, nervously scratching the back of his neck. It was obvious he couldn’t stick around much longer. “But uh…I gotta get going. The wife is waiting in the car with the kids.” He had a life, after all; a family to tend to, one that was sitting, waiting for his return. Once they said their goodbyes, and Nick and Gavin were alone again, Gavin moved to lean against the windowsill to admire the flowers.

“That was nice of him,” Gavin began only to be interrupted by his partner.

“You don’t have to say here.” It was hard for Nick to say those words, but he knew he’d feel even guiltier if he didn’t say anything and Gavin, in turn, suffered out of concern for his well-being.

“What do you mean? I don’t mind.”

“I know you don’t mind and I appreciate you wanting to be here, but you should go home and sleep in your own bed. Hell, you’re even wearing the same clothes and I’m sure you’d like to take a nice hot shower.” Nick paused to gather his thoughts. This was proving to be much more difficult than he thought. “You don’t need to worry about me; I’ll be fine here. I’m in good hands, now. Besides, it can’t be too much fun seeing as how I’m out of it half the time.”

It took Gavin a moment to soak in what Nick was saying to him. At first, it hurt him a bit to hear those words, but he did not hesitate to reply.

“I guess you’re right…”

“I just don’t want you to lose anymore sleep over me—” Nick continued, though he was stopped when Gavin raised his hand and shook his head. He went to the chair to grab his coat and made sure he wouldn’t be leaving anything behind once he was gone.

“I may be going home, but don’t think you’re not gonna see me again,” Gavin said, forcing a smile. He had always been exceptional when it came to hiding his true emotions quite well. Unfortunately, this had to be one of those times. At the edge of the bed, Gavin took Nick’s hand in his own and gave it a gentle squeeze. “Get some rest, okay?” Of course he would be back. That was a promise.

~

As badly as Gavin wished he could have stayed, Nick did have a point. The chair he slept in the night before was not as comfortable as it felt when he sat in it, and the blanket the nurse gave him wasn’t much of a blanket at all. He was feeling rather disgusting and wondered if he was beginning to smell now that it had been about two days since he had last showered.

On his phone, which he hadn’t checked since before the incident, Gavin found that he had several messages, most of which had been left by his colleagues at the department, but there were also a few from Cole. It struck him as odd that the man would be so desperate as to leave him more than one message—or any at all, for that matter. He would have to give Cole a call back and find out what the urgency was.

It rang once before anyone picked up. “I heard about what happened,” he said; probably over the news.

“I haven’t had much time to watch TV in the last 40 hours or so…”

“How is Nick doing?” Cole wondered, though that was somewhat of a strange question.


“He’s alive and expected to live, but it was pretty serious.”

“They didn’t divulge too many details. It’s good to hear he’s okay.”

“Yeah, well, I doubt you called to see how Nick is.”

“I’m just worried. Knowing you, you’re probably a mess.”

“Well,” Gavin sighed and moved out of the way to dodge an incoming gurney. He made a sharp left out of the entrance and walked across the parking lot towards his car, “I’m tired and smelly and I’m going home to take a shower right now.” Then he remembered the question had not yet been answered. “Why did you call me anyway?”

Cole hesitated shortly; an unusual behavior for such a naturally articulate man. “We haven’t spoken in a while…” He soon changed the subject. “Besides, I’m going to be heading out of town tonight, but it seems as thought the shit is already hitting the fan. I don’t want to come back and hear you’ve been shot, too.”

Gavin just rolled his eyes. “Don’t worry, I don’t intend to be.”

“I should hope not.” A brief moment of silence passed before either of them said anything, but Cole was the one to speak up first. “Gavin…”

“Hmm?”

“Be careful.”

More silence followed until the line clicked dead. Things had never been this way between then before and it struck Gavin as almost frightening to hear Cole act in such a way. Whatever the reason, he knew there would be no point in pursuing it. Now, he had other things to worry about.

--

As promised, Gavin returned the next day, the day after that and every other day until almost a week had passed since Nick had been admitted to the hospital. Only one or two times, Nick had been asleep but Gavin didn’t bother to wake him and, instead, he sat in the chair next to the window to run over a recent report they had written up regarding the case.

Once he began to read over the details of the interrogation of Cal Rogers, Dr. Pearson entered the room.

“Oh, I see you’re back.”

Gavin shut the folder, placed it on the chair and stood up. “Yeah, I had a bit of time after work, thought I’d drop by and see how he’s doing.”

“He’s doing quite well, actually,” the older man said. Dr. Pearson waited a moment before looking up from Nick to meet Gavin’s gaze. “Now that you’re here, there are some questions I wanted to ask you. Would you join me?”

Obliging the doctor’s request, Gavin followed and joined him in the hall.

They moved to a private alcove before Dr. Pearson began and sat across from each other in two matching chairs. “I’m planning on releasing Nick soon and I wanted to ask you if he will have anyone to look out for him when he does leave.”

“I don’t think so. Right now he’s in the process of moving and he’s holed up in a motel room.”

“Oh, no,” the doctor shook his head, “No, no, no. That’s not going to work.”

“But I have no problem looking after Nick. He can stay with me for as long as he needs to.”

“It wouldn’t be too long; a week, perhaps, at most.” Dr. Pearson paused again, thinking back to the day Nick was brought in. “I know it’s none of my business, but what about that woman that was here; his fiancée?”

“They’re, uh…no longer together…”

“Ah, I see. Well, then, I believe that about settles it. You’ve been so supportive this entire time, and since he’s got no designated power of attorney, I cannot think of a better person for him to be taken care of. I am, however, going to keep him here for another day or two just to make sure everything is where I want it to be, but I’d like you to be here when I tell him about his release. Do you think he’ll have any objection to it?”

Gavin couldn’t help but smirk. He knew Nick would try to refuse the offer, but that would be about as far as he would get. “He won’t have any say in the matter as long as I’m involved.”

~

“A month?” Nick stared, wide-eyed and slack-jawed at Dr. Pearson who stood at the end of the bed with his hands in his pockets.

“It really depends. That is a rough estimate, if anything. We’re going to have to put some time behind us before I can get a clearer picture of how long it will take for you to fully recover. I’d say in a month—month in a half at most—you’ll be up and walking around like you once were; running, even.”

The brunette let out a heavy sigh and glanced at Gavin who stood to his right. If he had had a choice, it would’ve been different, but the situation had turned out to be much more serious than anyone thought.

“Alright, then when do you think I’ll be able to leave the hospital?”

This time Dr. Pearson smiled; a welcome gesture to the daunting task of the recovery ahead.

“I’m going to release you in about a day or so, just to make one hundred percent sure. If I release you too soon and you put too much pressure on your body, you could stall or reverse the healing process. The best thing for you now is to remain here until I’m certain you’ll be okay on your own; although I am going to suggest, when you do leave, that you take it easy.”

“What exactly do you mean by ‘take it easy?’”

“Well, I’d strongly advise you wait another week to start walking around. You may gradually ease yourself into it, but it may take some time for you to get adjusted to the pain. Besides, the medication I prescribe you when you do leave may have some adverse side effects, so you might not even want to be up and walking around anyway.”

“What kind of side effects?”

“Dizziness, fatigue, sometimes nausea; it depends on the individual.”

“Oh…”

“Keep in mind that this is only until you begin your rehabilitation.”

Rehab—Nick hadn’t even thought about that yet.

Dr. Pearson glanced over at Gavin. Nick caught the eye contact and immediately knew that there was just one more thing.

“I also spoke with your partner here today about where you’ll be staying when you do go home. He tells me you’re currently living in a motel room, which kind of concerns me. I would strongly advise that someone is there with you for the first few days, at least. Because you’ll only be a week out of recovery and on some heavy medication, it would be best to have someone around to make sure nothing happens. And Gavin here has offered to take on that responsibility.”

Responsibility? Nick thought. Sounds like an obligation to me.

Gavin stepped closer to Nick’s beside and smiled down at him. “I was the one who suggested it, so don’t go rolling your eyes just yet. You can stay with me in my apartment, at least until you’re able to be on your own, which Dr. Pearson said wouldn’t take very long.”

“Yeah, but is it really necessary to—”

“Yes, it is,” Dr. Pearson interrupted. “Trust me, Nick. It’s either stay in the hospital or be a free man. I know it may not be the most ideal plan, but you’ll understand. The chances of you falling, slipping or crumbling under your own weight are far too probable. And if that happens, then it could mean sustaining even further injury.”

Nick glanced back at Gavin who gave him a look of concurrence.

“You really don’t have any say in this,” the blond said with a smile.

Quite obviously, it should have been apparent from the get go.

[Sabin]

I read chapter ten just for fun. Not that bad actually.
Ugh, I hate reading long posts like this. XD

[Bun]

Lol, sorry for the story being too long? :3 Glad you don't think it's all that bad, though.

(Disclaimer: Gonna be some gayness in this chapter, so if that's not your thing, then I suggest you stop reading.)

- -

Chapter Eleven



He had never been to Gavin’s apartment before and was, frankly, somewhat nervous about it. The fact that his partner had opened up his home and offered his hospitality seemed to be too much to ask for. If Nick had any say in the matter, he would have politely declined, not wanting to burden the man any further; that is, if he knew he had any chance of winning that battle. Of course, having Dr. Pearson on Gavin’s side did not help the likelihood of that happening. Either way, it was a lost cause.

Moreover, Gavin had even taken the liberty of checking Nick out of his motel room, grabbing his belongings before rushing to the hospital to pick him up. Their conversation with Dr. Pearson was brief, only lasting long enough to run through the rules and regulations Nick would need to follow now that he would no longer be in the hands of professionals. Dr. Pearson sent them off with a few handshakes and a prescription and they were off within an hour.

The ride to Gavin’s apartment was not a long one in terms of distance from the hospital, but Nick struggled to stay alert through the medication he had been left with. He snapped out of a short-lived moment of haziness to notice the car had stopped, and glanced out the window at a brick building.

Gavin was already jumping out of the driver’s side and opening the passenger door when Nick realized what was going on.

“The doc said you can use the crutches, but it might be pretty painful.”

Nick was certainly not looking forward to the journey, but he had little choice. “How else am I going to get upstairs?”

“I could always carry you,” Gavin said with a smile, which earned him a glare. He just laughed it off and scratched that idea. “Alright, we’ll do this together.”

Nick had already gotten his seatbelt off and had his right leg out of the door, but he was lost beyond that point. Even the slightest movement in his thigh muscle made him wince at the pain. It was no longer a matter of dignity, but rather being able to pull himself out of a car. All he cared about was getting upstairs and onto something comfortable.

Gavin positioned himself so he could—once Nick had a firm grasp on the doorway—wrap an arm around Nick’s waist to carry most of his weight. The first thing he noticed was how light Nick felt, which concerned him somewhat. It did make hoisting Nick out of the car much easier than he thought it would be. He then kicked the door shut behind them and made sure Nick was holding on tightly before he proceeded to the front door.

“You alright?”

“M’fine,” Nick muttered, though he seemed to be in a bit of pain. Gavin ignored it for the time being; his priority was to get Nick into the apartment unscathed and that’s what he was going to do.

Down the walkway was easy enough. A passerby held the door open for them, which made getting inside the lobby no problem at all. At the elevator, Nick began to exhibit signs of exhaustion by the way his body sagged from time to time, but the cab arrived shotfly.

They were on the fourth floor in no time, walking down the hallway to a door labeled ‘412’. For a moment, Gavin struggled to keep a hold of Nick while fishing through his pocket for his keys. Once he managed to get a hold of them and found the right one, the door opened and they were greeted by a rush of tepid air. The first thing Nick noticed was the scent of his partner; not strong or overpowering, by any means, but familiar and comforting.

Unfortunately, the apartment tour would have to wait. Gavin rushed them into the bedroom, straight to the bed which had been tidied before they arrived.

“You want me to take your bed?” Nick asked. “I can’t do that.”

“The only other choice is the couch and there’s no way I’m going to make you sleep out there.”

“But—"


“Don’t argue with me,” Gavin snapped and came down to his knees. “It’s just until you can settle down in your own place.”

By then, Nick had become used to Gavin’s slightly overbearing ways. He was much too exhausted to put up a fight either way. He barely even noticed Gavin take his shoes off and fell into the feathery pillow instead. It felt nice to be in a real bed and not some gurney surrounded by machines in a cold, sterile room. This was much different. This was comfortable.

“I’m gonna head down to the car and grab everything,” Gavin said as he put Nick’s shoes in the closet. “Do you need any help?”

All Nick could reply with was a muffled groan, not even a real word. He was already falling asleep once his head hit the pillow.


~


As Dr. Pearson had warned, the new medication came with unwelcome side effects.

As Nick woke up only a few hours after passing out on Gavin’s bed, he was hit with a wave of nausea; so much that he thought he would expel the few contents of his stomach if he didn’t get out of bed and into the bathroom at that moment. Still groggy and disoriented from the medication made it difficult to sit upright, but he managed to swing his legs over the edge of the bed. It must have still been taking effect since he wasn’t experiencing too much pain. He noticed the crutches leaning against the wall and went to grab them, but had miscalculated the distance. Having not used his injured leg since before the incident, which had lost a significant amount of strength, Nick went crashing to the floor instead, narrowly missing hitting his head on the corner of the nightstand.

Within seconds, the bedroom door flew open and Gavin was in the room rushing around the bed to Nick’s aid. He felt to his knees and helped the man back onto the bed, still on his knees in front of Nick to check for any injury.

“What the hell were you doing getting out of bed like that?! Are you okay?” When he received no answer, Gavin continued to make sure nothing had happened, looking specifically for any signs of bleeding from his wound. “Nick? Nick, can you hear me?” Still no answer.

“Do you remember getting out of bed just now?"

Nick blinked a few times and frowned. “I remember waking up…”

The blond let out a heavy sigh and dropped his head. Nick seemed to be okay other than the fact that he was just getting adjusted to his medication.

“You scared the hell out of me,” he said and took a seat next to his partner. “Are you alright?”

“I’m feeling pretty nauseous.”

Gavin didn’t even need to ask when Nick was already trying to stand on his own again, but with some help this time. They stumbled to the bathroom where Nick was lowered onto the floor in front of the toilet. He could only dry heave without having anything in his stomach to drive out; when he no longer had the strength to do even that, Nick sat against the door to give his body time to rest.

Gavin sat against the adjacent wall. He knew there wasn’t much he could do to help alleviate the symptoms, but he still felt horrible having to watch Nick suffer.

“I think that’s it for now,” Nick groaned, ready to get up from the cold tile floor. Gavin helped him and, instead of going back to the bed, went to the living room where they parked themselves on the couch. Nick made himself as comfortable as possible, but couldn’t help noticing the papers scattered around the coffee table.

“What are these?” he asked, picking out familiar names and information.

“I didn’t want to tell you this right away, but the lieutenant stopped by after you were put into ICU. He said the shooter in the apartment was Cal Rogers.”

Nick stared at Gavin, wide-eyed and slack-jawed, unsure of what to say.

“Wh-- but why was he…? And Sydney…”

“He said he was there waiting for Sydney, but we showed up instead. He said he got spooked and started shooting.”

“Then that means…”

“Nobody knows where Sydney went. Now that the news is all over the story, it looks like we’ve scared him off again.”

For a moment, Nick allowed the news to sink in before he said anything more. He was shocked, to say the least, and equally devastated knowing one of their suspects had escaped.

“Has Cal said anything about where Sydney might be?”

“No,” Gavin sighed. He pursed his lips and shook his head, but he wasn’t expecting Nick to react in such a manner. Even he was disappointed about losing Sydney, but Nick’s response seemed rather odd.

“I can’t believe this,” Nick muttered.

“We’re still working with Cal, but he doesn’t seem to know much of anything. We’re doing the best we can.”

“If this hadn’t happened…” Nick spat, motioning to his leg. “Maybe I could’ve done something more.”

“Done what? We’re all at kind of stumped here.”

It was eating at him, tearing him apart and the one man that might possibly understand was sitting right there, open and willing to listen to whatever he had to say. He couldn’t hold it in anymore. There was no way he could. If he did, he would explode and there was no telling what would happen.

“THAT…that man, Sydney…” Oh God, here it goes. “He was one of the suspects in the case that James was working on before he was murdered.”

There it was. It was out and Nick had no idea where it was going to take them.

Gavin, although quite obviously shocked by the fact, did not reply, so Nick continued.

“I didn’t realize it at first because I wasn’t assigned to the case, but I knew I recognized his name from somewhere. He was the one they were trying to take down the whole time and now he’s gone again; just like that.”

As surprised as the blond was to find this piece of information out now, of all times, he was glad that Nick had trusted in him enough to divulge such a thing.

“I- I’m sorry…I didn’t realize—"

His apology was cut off when Nick stopped him and shrugged. “How could you have known?”

“Well, I wish you had told me earlier.”

Nick turned to face his partner and, in a tone much angrier than he really meant, spat his reply. “Why? So you could get me booted off the case before I did something stupid?”

This sudden outburst had taken Gavin by surprise. “Of course not! Why would I do something like that?” Nick didn’t answer. He just sat there trying to hold what composure he had left. “I’m offended that you would assume I’d go and rat you out,” Gavin continued, though he didn’t take it too personally. Now all he could see on Nick’s face was a lingering expression of guilt. “That is the last thing I would do, for Christ’s sake.”

Turning to face his partner, Gavin scooted closer and glanced down at the fabric on the couch. “Listen…”

From out of nowhere, Gavin was pummeled by a powerful surge of nerves; although he had felt that way around Nick before, it was never like this. His heart beat loud enough that he could hear it in his ears and his hands were shaking and sweaty. Just being that close to Nick made it harder for Gavin to refrain from reaching out and touching him. With his partner on the verge of tears, the only thing he could think to do was to comfort the man, to take him into his arms and hold him like he had done a few weeks ago. The question was, however, whether he would allow himself to be swayed by his hesitation.

Not a word came to mind. He was completely and utterly speechless and resisting the urge to close the distance between them; Gavin’s will deteriorated as each second trudged on. And before he knew it, he could feel Nick’s hot breath against his lips. He had already gone too far at that point, unable to pull back as though nothing had happened. But what shocked him the most was, when their lips met, that Nick had not shoved him away. It was the opposite, in fact. Timid and unsure, the kiss lasted only a few seconds until Nick pulled back. His eyes were closed and his breath was heavy; he had a firm grasp on Gavin’s arms to steady himself.

Gavin licked his lips, reveling in the taste that lingered on them, but Nick had not said anything. Their eyes met again, this time speaking those unspoken words that Nick wished he could say. Suddenly, he was kissing his partner again, though much hungrier than before. Nick was almost glad he couldn’t stand because if he could, he would’ve been knocked to his feet. The kiss was completely different from how it began, no longer filled with the inhibition it started with, but somewhat needy and deprived.

Slowly, Nick began to warm to the contact and even allowed himself to moan softly at the way Gavin’s hands roamed around his body. He could tell that the man was holding himself back, undoubtedly because of his leg. Nick couldn’t have been anymore frustrated than he already was. He wanted to return the contact and press his himself against Gavin, eventually losing his mind in the craving.

Nick shifted on instinct, hoping it would allow for a better angle, but the weight of Gavin’s body had come down at the wrong time on the wrong spot. Nick let out a loud yelp, mostly out of fear that it would hurt more than he thought it would and Gavin immediately rolled away.

“I’m sorry!” the blond gasped, cupping the outside of Nick’s injured thigh.

“S’fine,” Nick sighed and let his head fall back into the couch cushion. He took a moment to compose himself and felt Gavin laid his head on his chest. On impulse, Nick brought a hand up to pet Gavin’s hair; the pain quickly subsided leaving only a dull throb.

“Are you okay?”

“Maybe we shouldn’t…”

Gavin whined under his breath, obviously irritated knowing it would be best if they stopped for safety’s sake. The last thing he wanted to do was hurt Nick any further, and it certainly not while fooling around.

[Saki Liu]

Sorry to tell you I didnt read the whole thing. I only read the first post, but it was amazing. I like the way you describe your settings its easy to picture and the beginning was great!

[Bun]

Sorry to tell you I didnt read the whole thing. I only read the first post, but it was amazing. I like the way you describe your settings its easy to picture and the beginning was great!

Glad you like it. I guess people just don't like reading too much these days. D:

[Sabin]

^No, no. It's good and there's nothing wrong with how long it is. It's just easier to read on paper.
Not your fault in any way. :P

[Bun]

^No, no. It's good and there's nothing wrong with how long it is. It's just easier to read on paper.
Not your fault in any way. :P

It still kinda sucks though. Because even if it isn't my fault, that's not going to change peoples minds about reading it.

[Bun]

Chapter Twelve



Gavin was exhausted and more than ready to go home. He had never been so excited to get in his car, but he knew it would be just a bit longer before he could relax. On the route he normally took, Gavin stopped at a stop light just before ascending a hill. He didn’t have to wait long for the light to turn green again and he gave the car a bit of gas to get going again. That particular road had been a shortcut, less crowded than the main highway which shaved off at least 10 minutes. It curved around the outskirts of a steep rock face and descended back down into the city, putting him just behind his apartment a few blocks away.

Halfway up the hill, Gavin reached to his right to turn the radio on. Somehow, the station had been left on something that made Gavin sneer, which he quickly changed to a random preset. Once he was satisfied with the music playing lowly in the background, Gavin gave the car a bit more gas to climb up the hill. He’d always had somewhat of a lead foot, especially when it came to driving to a song that pumped his adrenaline. Soon, his hand was drumming on the wheel to the beat of the song and he was turning to straighten the path of the car when the road leveled out. Before he knew what was happening, something forced the car forward like he had been struck from behind, sending the car forward.

He didn’t slam on the brakes. Although his heart dropped into his stomach, his eyes darted to the rearview mirror, and two headlights could be seen. Gavin gripped the steering wheel even tighter and braced himself when he saw them coming at a frightening speed. This time he would be ready.

- -


He was tired of being cooped up in the bedroom and desperately wanted to be able to stand, to walk around and move his body, but the pain was still significant enough that Nick could only go from the bedroom to the living room without feeling a white-hot fire burn through his leg. Nick made it to the couch and leaned his crutches against the cushions just in case, settling into the seat with a sigh of relief. Just that bit of movement had taken a lot out of him and it was disheartening to know he’d have to work hard to get things back to normal.

Luckily, the remote was lying on the cushion next to him. Nick grabbed it and went to turn the television on, but just before he could press the power button, a set of loud, distinct knocks sounded against the front door. He frowned, wondering who it could be and pulled himself off of the couch with his crutches. Nick managed to hobble to the front door where he peered out of the eyehole to see who his visitor was. Outside in the hall, the woman from before stood there nervously glancing over her shoulders. Immediately, Nick undid the locks and pulled the door open to Gale’s surprise.

“Oh! I’m sorry. Is Gavin not here?”

On his crutches, Nick moved aside to let her in and made his way back to the couch.

“Not yet,” Nick replied, leaving Gale to shut and lock the door. “He was supposed to be home about an hour ago, but I haven’t heard anything since.”

“I see.”

Over his shoulder, Nick said, “Feel free to wait if you want,” and took to the task of sitting back down. He fell hard onto the couch again with little effort this time and Gale took a seat in the big armchair adjacent to where Nick was sitting.

“I guess I can wait for a moment.” When she sat, there was an awkward silence between them, only natural seeing as how they knew little about each other despite sharing one thing in common. “May I ask what happened to your leg?”

Nick met her curious gaze and thought back to when it happened. During the night, he had been plagued with dreams of the moment the bullet pierced his skin. It was fresh in his mind and he wouldn’t soon forget it.

“I was shot while on duty.”

“Oh, I’m—I’m very sorry,” Gale said with a frown. “Was it serious?”

“Well, I almost died from an excessive amount of blood loss, so yeah…it was pretty serious.” Nick paused again, realizing that the situation had not been all that bad. She would be pleased to hear some good news. “Gavin was there when it happened; he never left my side, either. He even offered for me to stay with him until I’m able to be on my own.”

That made Gale smile. He no longer felt the sickness churning in his stomach that he usually felt.

“That sounds like Gavin,” she said and laughed softly to herself.

Nick found her response to be somewhat odd and stared at her with a curious gleam in his eyes.

“Forgive me. I just thought, with you staying here, that maybe you two were together.”

It took Nick a moment to realize what she had meant by ‘together’, but when he did, he found himself stumbling over his words to correct her assumption.

“Gavin and I? Oh, no. We’re not—I mean, we’re just…”

“Partners,” Gale said with a small chuckle this time. She thought Nick was cute when he was panicking.

He knew he had gone red in the face as he was feeling rather embarrassed by the way he had acted. “Yeah…”

The room was blanketed by the same awkward silence they had felt before.

“I should be going,” Gale said as she stood from her seat. Nick went to push himself off of the couch when Gale stopped him. “Don’t get up! I’ll show myself out.”

Just as the woman made it to the front entryway, she stopped and turned to say one last thing.

“Could you tell Gavin that I need to speak with him?”

Nick nodded, of course, he thought and watched as she smiled and headed for the door. When he heard the lock click shut, Nick let himself relax into the cushions.

~

It was 11:41 PM when Gavin parked his car and a few minutes had passed when he finally came through the back door of his apartment building. He took the stairs instead of the elevator and fished his keys out of his pocket quietly before arriving at his front door. He stepped in quietly, shutting and locking the door behind him and crept through the entryway towards the living room. The flickering light from the television through the darkness caught his attention. There on the couch he found Nick sleeping upright with his head slumping sideways. Gavin moved deftly around the edges of the coffee table and sat down next to his partner. It took Nick a moment to rouse, but when he did, he was rather flustered.

“Where th’hell’ve you been?!” Nick huffed, obviously relieved to see the blond.

“I’m sorry I didn’t call,” Gavin replied as Nick held onto him. “Something happened…”

“What? What happened? Is everything alright?”

He didn’t know how to begin to explain the night’s events. Even Gavin was still trying to soak in what had happened and he was sure Nick would hardly believe it either.

“I was on my way home, on the back roads, when this car came out of nowhere and rammed me from behind.” Nick’s eyes shot wide open, but no words came out of his mouth. “They were trying to run me off of the road, but I managed to lose them.”

“Who were they?”

“I don’t know,” Gavin shrugged. “The car was pretty common; no plates either and the windows were tinted so I couldn’t see inside. Like I said, I lost them before anything else could happen.”

“Well are you alright?” Nick asked, pulling at Gavin’s clothing as if to check for any injuries. It was almost endearing the way his partner seemed to be so worried, but also slightly upsetting as well.

“I’m fine. A little shaken up, but nothing happened. If anything, I should be worried about my car; it got pretty beat up.”

“Then you must’ve contacted someone?” Nick wondered. He was referring to the fact that four hours had passed since they’d last spoken to each other.

“Yeah… I ended up having to go a different direction. I figured whoever was in the car wasn’t trying to kill me or else they would’ve done it sooner. They must’ve been following me from the department, so I called Jim since he was the closest. We met up at a park, got a hold of the lieutenant and took things from there.”

The frown that Nick wore only stiffened. The entire situation had been one big shock and he was still trying to process the news.

“What are you going to do?”

Gavin pushed himself off of the couch, placed his hands on his hips and moved around the coffee table to pace the room. They could only follow procedure at that point, but there was no telling if anyone would be caught.

“We’ll have to keep quiet about it until there’s more to go on. And I’ll have to be more careful moving around, as well.”

“This is crazy,” Nick spat and shook his head. Things were becoming awfully reminiscent of the incident with James and Valerie and he didn’t like it one bit.

Gavin stopped in his tracks in the middle of the living room to glance at his partner through the dark room. Nick had dropped his gaze and was avoiding eye contact, no doubt playing the worst-case scenarios through his head. Seeing his partner like that, Gavin wasted no time in joining Nick again on the couch. He snaked an arm around the back of Nick’s neck and pulled the man down into his shoulder.

“I’m fine,” he told him, but Nick let out a dry laugh.

“Yeah, this time.”

Enough was enough. Gavin couldn’t stand to hear Nick speak like that any longer. He pushed him back, close enough that he could still stare into Nick’s eyes.

“I’m not going to leave you, alright?” He could’ve sworn he saw a glimmer of light as they glazed over with a thin film of tears, but Nick wasn’t crying; at least he was trying not to.

[Bun]

Chapter Thirteen



This was the first time since Mindy’s death that he was allowing himself to venture out in public. If the police didn’t find him first, it would’ve been some backstabbing, money-grubbing traitor looking for a quick reward by bringing his head on a silver platter, but Jackie couldn’t have that just yet. He had a meeting with an old friend and one he wouldn’t miss for the world.

In a room located down a long hallway at the back of the club, Jackie waited patiently, sitting on the couch that made an L shape around the room. The building vibrated from the intense beats that pulsated through the air. He knew he had heard the song before somewhere, but couldn’t recall the name of it; although muffled, it was still loud enough that no one would be able to listen in on their conversation.

Jackie knew he wouldn’t have to wait much longer for their meeting to commence. A few moments prior, he had been informed of his associate’s arrival, giving him just enough time to clear his mind. Before the man stepped in, Jackie heard a set of loud knocks on the door. He stood from the couch and smoothed out his dark, tailored blazer, watching as the door opened and Sydney stepped inside.

“Long time no see,” Sydney said with a smirk, but Jackie never once offered anything more than a nod. Instead, he took a seat on the couch again and threw both arms over the back, crossing one leg over the other.

“Yes, well it was a shame that I had to cancel our meeting in Philadelphia.” Jackie glanced up at Sydney who took a seat on the sofa across from him. “I see you’re looking well.”

“As well as anyone could look,” Sydney replied with a snicker. “After everythin’ that’s been goin’ down…”

“I heard about the incident in your apartment. It seems as though that detective survived.”

“Yeah, that idiot Cal went and got himself arrested for it. They’ll give him some time for that one.”

“What a shame…”

Only the loud thump of music could be heard until Jackie spoke up again.

“There’s something I’ve been meaning to ask you about now that we’re together—in regards to Mindy.”

Sydney gulped and hoped that the other man might’ve missed his reaction, but he was well aware of just how vigilant of a man Jackie had always been.

“Don’t worry, Sydney,” the taller man laughed, “Her death was necessary. I guess you were right about her. I don’t appreciate it when people take advantage of me and my business. But the thing is; now the cops are all over this.”

“Yeah…”

“I wasn’t planning on having to deal with such a mess and I don’t think my associate is very happy about it either. Cleaning up your lack of common sense has cost me a lot of time and a lot of money, you know.”

Someone announced their arrival with a knock on the door, which Sydney craned his neck over his shoulder to get a better look at. Two men slipped into the room, not immediately attacking him, though they confirmed his previous suspicion.

“I can’t afford another screw up, Sydney. Had you been more inconspicuous about things, I might’ve thought to show you a bit of mercy, but I gave you more than enough chances to prove yourself and you’ve failed each and every time.”

Jackie stood from the couch when he received no answer, shoving his hands in his pockets and strolled across the room to stop just beside the man still sitting down on the couch.

“I thought perhaps I had made the right decision in deciding to work with you,” he said; his voice filled with an apathy that would frighten any man. Jackie then glanced up at the two men who waited in the corner of the room for their next order. They had been told previously not to touch Sydney until Jackie was in the hall and well on his way out of the club. He would be long gone, just another person in the crowd when they brought Sydney to the floor and in his car when Sydney was no longer breathing.

--

“Developing news tonight at a nightclub in downtown Baltimore. Police have arrived on the scene of what appears to be a shooting. Authorities are telling us that a white male who appears to be in his 30s has been shot and killed in a back room of club Rush; a popular venue which has since been cleared out due to this incident. It happened sometime after 10:00 PM when police were contacted by one of the managers of the club. The club’s owner is said to be away on business, but is cooperating with the authorities on the matter. Again, we are unsure of the identity of the victim and police are not releasing any information on whether there is a suspect in the case just yet. Stay tuned to the 11:00 o’clock news for more information as it comes—”

Gavin dropped his head in his hands. He wanted to let out a loud, painful groan, but he was too tired and preoccupied with other matters to do much of anything. He barely even noticed it when Jim muted the television and rounded the desk to lean against the corner.

“It’s almost one in the morning, Gav. Why don’t you take off?”

The idea would’ve sounded nice had he not been dreading facing Nick. Despite having the media swarming all over this thing, he knew his partner was completely unaware of the fact that the man they had been after for such a long time was now lying somewhere on a cold table in a hospital morgue. He knew he would be devastated and Gavin was at a complete loss as to how to approach the situation.

“I mean, the lieutenant even sent you away earlier and you’ve been here for an hour now. When are you planning on going home?”

“I don’t know,” Gavin sighed and slapped his hands down on the top of his desk. “I just…”

“…Need some rest,” Jim answered for him, but he had no idea what the real problem was. Regardless of the fact, the detective plucked Gavin’s coat off of the rack and handed it to him. “You were supposed to take some time off anyway after what happened. I doubt it’ll be a big deal if you leave now.”

He would have to face Nick again sometime; there was no way around it. Without putting up a fight, Gavin pushed himself out of his chair and headed for the door, but not before Jim gave him an encouraging slap on the back. At least he knew he wouldn’t walk into the apartment and, right away, see that look on Nick’s face. If he had some time to think things through, maybe he could come in prepared.

The drive home, on a different route after what had happened, seemed to be much longer than it normally took. Gavin pulled into the underground structure and parked his car in his designated spot. He grabbed his coat out of the front seat and made his way upstairs to the fourth floor. This time, when Gavin entered the apartment, the television was not on and he could hardly see a thing had it not been for a light shining through his balcony window. It was somewhat of a relief to find the couch empty this time, meaning Nick was asleep in the bedroom.

Gavin almost didn’t want to sneak inside, but he couldn’t very well sleep in his suit. He had no choice but to open the bedroom door as quietly as possible and slip inside. Heading straight to the dresser, Gavin reached out to pull the top draw open when he heard Nick shift under the covers.

“Sorry,” he murmured. “I didn’t mean to wake you.”

“I was drifting in and out,” Nick said as he sat upright. He ran a hand through his tousled hair and stifled a yawn. Even through the darkness, he could tell something was wrong. “You okay?”

The only thing Gavin had been thinking about the entire trip home was how to break the news, but he was still at a loss and was desperately looking for a way to make this easier. Gavin ignored his clothes for the moment and went to sit down on the other side of the bed. He kept his back to his partner, never making any eye contact but only because he was too much of a chicken shit to do so.

“You didn’t happen to watch the news tonight, did you?”

Nick frowned a bit and remained silent as he thought about what Gavin might be hinting at. He made the connection quickly, recalling watching the breaking news story a few hours earlier.

“Yeah, why? What happened?”

Gavin closed his eyes and braced himself. I don’t know how to tell you this, but… “Sydney’s dead.”

The room fell deathly silent. The only thing Gavin could hear was the loud pounding of his heartbeat in his ears. And then it came.

“…What?”

“The man who got shot at the club today was Sydney,” the blond continued. “We don’t know who did it, but it’s him.”

Again, a heavy silence blanketed the room, but this time it lasted even longer.

“I don’t understand. How is that possible?”

If only Gavin could answer that question. He might feel better then.

“Nobody saw it happen. The manager wasn’t even sure who was in the room before that. He said there might’ve been two men and possibly another one…” Gavin wasn’t even sure why he was trying to explain himself. It almost felt as though he was the one at fault, but that seemed ridiculous when he thought about it. The lack of a response from Nick was killing him; he had to turn around and face the man. But he wasn’t expecting to see such an expression on Nick’s face. He couldn’t even read it.

“That’s it?”

Gavin blinked curiously at the question, unsure of what the question meant or even how to respond.

“I…guess?” Lifting his legs onto the bed, Gavin turned to face his partner and scooted closer. “Are you alright?”

It took Nick a moment to respond, but when he did, it was not what Gavin had imagined it would be. Nick dropped his head into his hand, rubbing at his weary eyes. “Yeah, I'm...just tired, I guess,” he said, slinking further under the covers and turning his back to his partner. Nick settled his head against the pillow, pulling the blanket up to his chin though he did not intend to go to sleep.

Gavin spoke softly, “Okay,” and stood from the mattress. He wasn’t going to pry any further seeing as how late it already was.

--

Neither of them spoke about the night before. The morning was spent in almost complete silence on the way to the hospital and waiting for Dr. Pearson was just as reticent. Fortunately, the doctor arrived quickly enough that they didn’t have to wait long.

Dr. Pearson smiled as he stepped into the room and approached Nick who sat on the bed.

“You’re looking much better,” he said and took a seat on a stool. “So, how is the pain?”

“Not as bad as it was, but it comes and goes…”

“And have you been able to walk with the crutches?”

“I’m getting used to them, finally.”

Dr. Pearson nodded and glanced down at his leg. “I’m going to need to take a look at it,” he said and met Gavin’s eyes. “Will you be staying…?”

The blond stood from the chair and shook his head. Although it looked as though Nick wanted to say something, he kept his mouth shut instead and watched as his partner excused himself from the room.

Once they were alone, Nick—with some assistance—removed the obstructing piece of cloth and lay down on the bed to allow Dr. Pearson to examine his thigh.

“The stitches seem to be in tact and the wounds are healing quiet nicely. You’ve been avoiding walking around much; I can tell.”

“Doesn’t exactly feel all that great when I try.”

“As expected,” Dr. Pearson replied. He checked both the entrance and exit wounds and told Nick he could get dressed again. “I can't put an exact date on when you'll be able to start walking without the crutches, but chances are it will be at least a month.” Dr. Pearson paused as he remembered something and changed the subject. “You were staying with your partner, correct? When exactly was it you planned on moving?”

“By the weekend, actually.”

“So tomorrow, then.” The room fell silent as Dr. Pearson thought to himself. “It shouldn’t be a problem so long as you don't exert yourself more than necessary. You do plan on having people to take care of the move for you?”

“Of course.”

“And I assume there’s been little issue with the medication you’re on?” Nick nodded in reply. “Have you become acquainted to the crutches yet or is it still somewhat difficult to walk around with them?"

"I can do it, it's just uncomfortable."

"Then if you feel confident enough to function on your own, I don’t see any problems with you returning home.”

It was a relief to hear such good news after everything that had happened in the last week. But Nick couldn’t help feeling somewhat disheartened by the fact that he was no longer going to be staying with Gavin.

“Well then, I’ve been in touch with your department about rehabilitation, but we won’t get into that just yet. It will take another few weeks before you can delve into the actual process, so that’s why I want you to keep healing.” Dr. Pearson stood up from the stool and extended his hand which Nick shook. “I look forward to seeing you soon,” he said, leaving the room shortly after.

[Bun]

Chapter Fourteen will not be posted as it contains graphic imagery and can be found on its website.

[Bun]

Chapter Fifteen



Gavin was anxious to leave the department to check out Nick’s apartment. They had discussed it the night before while lying in bed. He hadn’t voiced his displeasure of the fact that Nick was going to leave, but knew he was being childish about it. There was no way that Nick could stay there. He had his own life, his own things, his own routine, and a new place to get away from the world. It would be important for him to feel like he was finally settled in, especially during such a difficult time. Just as Gavin readied himself to leave the office, he groaned inwardly when the lieutenant caught him as he stood from his chair. He hadn’t a clue what Reese wanted and couldn’t exactly refuse to speak to the man either. Instead, he followed Reese into his office, hoping that their conversation would be a quick one.

Reese sat behind his desk and extended a hand to the chair in front of him before he said anything. “Please, have a seat.”

“What is it you wanted to speak with me about, sir?” Gavin asked as he got settled.

Leaning forward, the lieutenant laced his fingers together and propped them on the desk. He inhaled deeply, taking his time to being only unnerving the detective even more. “I was doing a bit of research recently when I stumbled across something that caught my attention. It was rather concerning. I’m assuming you’ve already made the connection by now, if Nick hasn’t already told you?”

Gavin had an inkling as to what he was hinting at, but it was in his best interest to play dumb, however. “About what, sir?”

“The murder of his sister and her husband. She was the Assistant DA and he was a cop. It was all over the news.”

“Yeah,” Gavin muttered, “I…heard.”

“So you do know?”

“He told me about it—yes.”

“Then you may already know where this is conversation is headed.” Reese paused to gather his thoughts and continued. “It seems that our deceased suspect had a hand in their murders. Unfortunately, the case is still cold.”

“He did mention something about Sydney.”

The room fell silent when Reese said nothing in reply. He simply stared at Gavin, obviously thinking something yet not saying it. What came out of his mouth next, Gavin was not expecting. “I’m going to take both of you off of the case.”

Gavin sat frozen in his seat, staring at the lieutenant and at a complete loss for words.

“You’re what?”

“Nick has become a liability now.”

“But you can’t do that…”

“I’m afraid I have little choice at this point.”

“How is taking your primary detectives off the case going to get it solved any sooner?” Gavin barked, bravely raising his voice to emphasize his irritation.

“That is not the point. It’s become way too personal. I have one man out of commission and he won’t even be able to return to work for a month; if that. It makes no sense to have half a team now that things are getting complicated. And who knows what he’s capable of doing considering his mental stability.”

“Nick isn’t mentally unstable if that’s what you’re implying.”

“I believe the psychological evaluation will answer that.”

“With all due respect, sir, you don’t spend all day with him. If anyone knows the answer to that question, it should be me.”

“You’re stepping out of line, detective; this not a matter that you have jurisdiction over. Whether he is or isn’t, I cannot take the chance that he’ll do something when he does return.”

Behind his back, the decision had been made. There was no point in arguing unless he wanted to be reprimanded even further and Gavin knew better than to push his luck. His only concern at that point was Nick.

“…Has this been decided yet?”

“It’s not set in stone, but I will need to tell him sooner or later. I am worried, however, since he’s been aware of the fact for some time now. Now I’m not saying that he will pursue it on his own, but it’s better for everyone if we don’t give him the chance to. He’s your partner, Gavin and you seem to be rather close to him. I want you to make sure he doesn’t do anything stupid...”

--


“Hey.”

When the door opened, Gavin’s stomach dropped the moment he met Nick’s gaze. The only thing he could think of was how unsuspecting the man was and how bad he felt for what was to come.

It took every ounce of strength for Gavin to remain composed, but he still found it difficult not to look completely devastated. “You all settled in?”

“If you call this settled,” Nick chuckled and turned back to the living room. He took a seat on the couch, propping his crutches next to him and met the blond’s nervous gaze. “Um, you look like a wreck. Is everything okay?”

“Yeah, I just…had a long day.”

“Well, take a load off.”

Reluctantly, Gavin accepted the offer and took a seat next to his partner at the other end of the couch. He had deliberately left some space in between them for fear that Nick would pick up on his nerves. Instead of making eye contact, he glanced around the room and noticed a few boxes had been cut open. The top of the desk was covered with the contents of at least one box, but not much else had been tampered with.

“It looks like you’ve been busy.”

Nick scoffed and rolled his eyes. “Hardly. The entire day and I get through three boxes.”

“You haven’t been pushing yourself, I hope?”

“As much as I wish this place was already unpacked, I didn’t want to end up making things worse. It looks like it’ll have to wait.” Nick sighed and glanced to his side. He couldn’t help but shake the odd feeling he got just from looking at Gavin and felt the need to ask again. “You sure you’re alright? It seems like something is bothering you.”

“Huh? Yeah, I’m fine. Things are just crazy at the department,” Gavin answered, much too hastily than he intended. He stood from the couch and fidgeted with his jacket, more than ready to leave. “Look, I should probably go. I gotta get up early...”

“Alright…” Nick rose from the couch, following Gavin to the door.

“I’ll stop by tomorrow, okay? You should get some rest.”

Nick nodded in reply, but Gavin didn’t stick around long enough for Nick to say anything more. The man was gone before he could delve any deeper.

--

Nothing of had been mentioned about the decision during the next twenty-four hours and that scared Gavin. He could hardly concentrate on his work, eventually forcing Jim to comment about his nervous behavior. Gavin ignored the comment, however, and rushed out of the office as quickly and quietly as he could, hoping that no one would cross his path. If they had, he thought he might not stop.

He sped the entire way to Nick’s apartment and parked his car out front at the only spot available. Gavin didn’t bother to hit the lock button or wait for the elevator. He pulled open the door at the back of the building and took the stairs, two, three at a time, finally arriving at the fifth floor. Winded and panting for air, Gavin found his way to Nick’s door and knocked loud enough to disturb the neighbors. No one came out, however and no one answered the door. It made his stomach drop and his heart flutter with anticipation. He reached out to grab the knob to find it unlocked and opened the door only to be greeted by a cool breeze.

“Nick?” Gavin called out, but there was no answer. “Where are you?” He checked down the hall, in the kitchen and finally reached the living room, finding nothing. “Hey, Nick?” Gavin couldn’t help but think of the worst possible scenario, especially when his eyes fell upon the bedroom door, which had been closed. He approached it slowly and pressed his ear against the wood, hoping to hear something that would ease his tension. “Nick, are you in there? Are you okay?”

A moment of silence passed until the door swung open and Gavin jumped back. He moved out of Nick’s way, surprised to see the man looking so upset—almost as if he wanted to throw a punch at him. But instead of doing that, Nick shuffled across the room and stopped at the coffee table.

“The lieutenant dropped by,” he said, keeping his back to the blond.

Oh, shit…

Nick paused, not necessarily waiting for a reply. He knew Gavin was speechless and didn’t even allow him to try and explain.

“Why didn’t you tell me?” Nick asked, finally turning to face the man.

“I—”

“…’cannot fucking believe you,” Nick spat.

“Hey, I didn’t even find out until yesterday myself!”

“But you knew.”

“Well, yeah…”

“And you didn’t have the decency to mention anything?”

“He sprung it on me just like he did you. What was I supposed to say?”

“I don’t know! You could have mentioned that he was planning on swinging by to tell me I’m off the case.”

“Why are you mad at me? It’s not like I made the decision. I had no say in the matter.”

Nick could hardly see straight he was so exasperated, but Gavin was not backing down.

“That’s not the point. I thought maybe you would’ve told me instead of hiding it.”

“…So this is my fault?”

“You sure as hell aren’t making things any easier.”

“He took me off the case, too, y’know—just in case you forgot.”

“Doesn’t sound like you did all that much to fight the decision.”

That was a downright low blow, a comment uncalled for, but despite Nick’s stubborn attitude, Gavin wasn’t going to give up without a fight. “Alright, I’ll admit. Maybe I should have said something to you, but I had no control over this.” Nick just tore his glance away, avoiding having to make things worse by allowing that connection. It was offensive and Gavin would not let his partner get away with it. He closed the distance between them and grabbed hold of Nick’s arm. “Damnit, Nick, look at me!” Nick was shocked by it at first, but he remained silent, allowing Gavin to continue. “I didn’t mean for this to happen, but I don’t have the power to change things either!”

“How long were you planning on keeping this a secret?”

Gavin frowned and blinked, surprised at how reproachful the man was. “Secret…?”

“Forget it,” Nick replied, shaking his head. He shrugged his arm out of Gavin’s grasp and hobbled towards the front door, speaking in a low tone. “I don’t want to talk about this anymore.”

“Wait a minute.”

“You should go home.”

“I’m not going home.”

“Get out…”

“No, I will not—”

“LEAVE!”

The sudden outburst stopped Gavin dead in his tracks. Now he was on the receiving end of Nick’s temper and it felt not only humiliating, but painful as well. Somewhere, deep down, he knew he had little chance of convincing the man to see otherwise. He’d never seen Nick so upset before. It was heartbreaking and frustrating at the same time. There was no leveling with the man at a time like this.

Gavin said no more, knowing if he continued to argue that things would quickly spiral out of control and become much worse than they already were. He said nothing, barely even looked at Nick and slipped passed him through the entryway. It hurt to have to walk away without a chance to explain himself, but if it would save them from any further confrontation then he would gladly oblige.

--

Cole didn’t know what to think when he got the call from Gavin’s cell phone only to hear the line click dead the moment he answered. Gavin had not left a message either and that was what convinced him that something was not right. Straight from his meeting, Cole decided he would at least stop by to check on things and arrived just after sun down.

He could hardly believe his eyes when the door swung open. There in front of him stood Gavin, bleary-eyed and quite obviously drunk or at least well on his way. Cole said nothing at first, just slipped inside the apartment and shut the door behind him as Gavin made his way back to the living room. He watched the blond stumble in his steps and joined him shortly.

Something seemed off—missing, he thought.

“Where is Nick?”

“Went home,” Gavin muttered, though his words were somewhat slurred.

“Already?”

When he received no answer, Cole quickly got the idea that something must have happened between the two.

“You’ve always been very good at hiding your feelings. What’s going on?” the dark-haired man asked and joined Gavin on the couch. It took him a moment to answer, seemingly unwilling to talk though clearly in need of some sort of outlet.

“We’re off th’case.”

The news was surprising at first. Cole wasn’t sure how to respond.

“…What?”

“The l’tenant thinks it’s getting too personal. He told Nick earlier tonight and when I wen’over there…”

“And took it out on you?”

Gavin shrugged, snorting at the thought.

“He thinks I was hiding it on purpose, but I only found out the day before. Nick shouted at me and told me t’get th’hell out.”

On some level, Cole had been waiting for this day since he realized there was something more between them. He couldn’t say he felt bad about what happened and saw it as a chance to slip in undetected. At any other time, Cole would have allowed himself the pleasure of comforting the blond, but somehow it was different. Gavin had never been so upset over someone before, at least not in the time they had known each other and never over him.

“Sounds like it was pretty brutal.”

“Brutal? I’ve never been so humiliated,” Gavin spat; then let his head fall back into the cushions. “I couldn’ do anything…”

Gavin leaned forward and dropped his head into his hands. He nearly jumped when he felt a hand glide up his back. A part of him had summoned Cole for comfort. Anytime he needed someone to fall back on; Cole was there. The man had been a stable part of his life for quite some time, reliable and a means of support. There was no one in the world he trusted more than Cole, but that was different now.

“I’m sorry…”

“You’re not sorry,” Gavin snapped, shooting a glance over his shoulder.

Cole rolled his eyes and kept his hand on Gavin’s back. “I’m going to ignore your snotty attitude because you’re drunk.”

“I’m not drunk.”

“You’re well on your way.”

Standing from the couch, Cole shrugged his blazer off and went to hang it over the back of a chair. Gavin watched curiously, having not expected the man to even show up.

“Get up.”

“What?”

“You heard me,” the dark-haired man said, waving his hand. He moved back to the couch to give Gavin a hand, but Gavin didn’t accept it.

“Where are we going?”

“To your bedroom.”

“But…”

“Come on,” Cole said, physically picking Gavin up from the couch. He staggered behind the taller man and flinched when Cole shoved him onto the bed. He settled on his back on the mattress, watching as Cole stuck a finger into the knot of his tie to loosen it. Gavin crawled backwards to sit upright to be joined shortly.

On his hands and knees, Cole crawled over him onto the mattress. He pushed the blond down and nearly grinned at the wide-eyed, slack-jawed expression that Gavin wore, but managed to keep a straight face as he lay down beside him.

“I’m not tired, you know,” Gavin grumbled. He stopped struggling against Cole’s grasp and let his head rest on the man’s chest.

“It’s not your decision.”

“Yes, mother…”

[Bun]

Chapter Eighteen posted on website.

[sobchack]

it's pretty great you wrote something original and stuff, but i think both me and a lot of other people find it a drag to read "books" off our computer screens. i don't know, it just doesn't feel right.

[Bun]

It's not a book, but I understand what you mean. The concept of eBooks or any kind of electronic literature more than one chapter is very off putting to people as it is still find it a novel idea. I put this up here for the people who actually care to take the time to read it, so it's their choice ultimately. Thank you for the input, though.